The Unheard Shot
by IReallyLoveSantana
Summary: No one thought a patient had been injured during the shooting.  But when Lexie stumbles across a wounded teenager, she does everything she can to save her.
1. Chapter 1

Mr. Clark walked the seemingly empty hallways warily. He had seen the SWAT team vehicle outside in the parking lot, and was sure that they would enter the hospital soon enough. A sudden movement caught his eye, and he raised the pistol quickly. There stood a woman in dark blue scrubs, the scrubs he had learned that only surgeons wore. Without so much as hesitating, he fired the gun and the woman dropped quickly. Blood pooled out around her and she only convulsed once before dying.

"Hey! You sick bastard! You just shot her!" A voice rang out behind him, and Mr. Clark whirled around. He fired his gun into the figure instinctively, not bothering to see who it was until it was too late. Much to his regret, he realized that he had just shot a patient. Even worse, it was a young teenage girl. She lay in a growing pool of blood, sobbing and clutching her side.

"I'm so sorry." Mr. Clark muttered, shaking his head. He went to turn when footsteps and the sound of wheels caught his attention. He saw a young blonde woman in light blue scrubs pushing a cart come around the bend.

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><p>The bleeding girl on the floor fought to hear what her shooter was saying as her heartbeat pounded in her ears. Her vision blurred in an out of focus, but she could make out the form of a woman in scrubs. After a few seconds, much to her dismay, she heard a gunshot, and the woman dropped. Hopeless, the girl closed her eyes and waited to die.<p>

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><p>Lexie had to fight to keep herself together. She had just nearly been <em>shot. <em>She was almost with George and Izzie and her mother again. The thought haunted her the whole way back to Alex's room, where she forced herself to clear her head and focus on helping the bleeding man.

When the SWAT team finally came to escort them out, Lexie, Sloan, and Alex were ushered out of the hospital. It was when she finally got outside that Lexie remembered her sister. Mr. Clark had said he had only intended to kill three people: Dr. Weber, Derek, and herself. And wherever Derek was, Meredith was going to be. Without thinking for her own safety, Lexie ran back into the hospital to find her sister.

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><p>Lexie sprinted through the halls, her loud footsteps echoing off of the walls. She rounded another corner and suddenly found herself flat on her back, staring up at the ceiling. A pain shot through her spine and tailbone, and she groaned. Feeling warmness on her back and arms, she looked down to see she had slipped in a giant pool of blood. Lexie turned to see a young girl staring at her helplessly, trying to stop the bleeding from her side.<p>

"Oh my God. Can you hear me sweetie?" Lexie stuttered, grabbing a pair of gloves off of the abandoned supply cart next to them. She pulled them on and gently rolled the shot girl onto her back. To her relief, the girl nodded weakly.

"Ok, good. I need you to tell me your name, alright?" Lexie said gently. She undid the girl's gown enough so that her torso was exposed, leaving her only with her bra. Blood was still streaming out of the wound heavily, and Lexie quickly grabbed gauze off of the cart. She held it to the wound and pressed firmly on it.

"A-Alice." The teenager panted out. She groaned as Lexie applied more pressure to the wound.

"Ok, Alice, you're going to be alright, understand?" Lexie told her, pulling the blood soaked gauze away from the wound. Alice nodded and clenched her jaw. Her face and lips were drained of color, and her skin had begun to feel cold.

Lexie grabbed everything she could salvage off of the cart, but there wasn't much. She ended up with only a role of medical tape, more gauze, several clamps, a few forceps, and a few bandages.

"Ok, Alice, I need you to bite down on this, because this is really going to hurt." Lexie said as comfortingly as she could. The teenager took the bit of gauze into her mouth and prepared herself for the pain.

Lexie rolled the much younger girl onto her side and saw that there was no exit wound. She gently set Alice onto her back again and saw the look of anguish on the teenager's pale face. "I'm so sorry." She said, tears welling in her eyes. She took one of the forceps and put a finger on opposite sides of the wound. With that, the doctor plunged the forceps into the wound and gripped the bullet. She pulled it out slowly, trying to block out the cries of agony from the writhing girl she was extracting the bullet from.

At last, the bullet was out, along with a lot more blood, and Lexie tossed the surgical tool to the side. It skidded down the hallway as she immediately held more gauze to the wound. Alice had fallen silent except for the occasional whimper, and she spit the gauze out onto the floor beside her.

"You're doing great." Lexie told Alice. The teenager made eye contact with her for the first time.

"I thought he shot you." She nearly whispered. Her eyelids fluttered and she forced them open.

"Almost." Lexie said breathlessly. The fresh memory came back to her and she shook it away, intent on stopping the bleeding.

Alice didn't say anything else, and her muscles clenched further. S small squeak escaped her lips and to Lexie's surprise, she started trying to sit up. "Hey, you need to lie back, okay?" The doctor said, putting a bloody hand on the girl's shoulder. Alice fell back onto her elbow and stared past Lexie.

"You shouldn't have come back here." The low voice cause Lexie to freeze. She looked into her patient's eyes and saw the terror, which instantly told her who was behind her. Turning around and getting up out of the kneeling position, she came face to face with Mr. Clark.

_**Okay, so I was watching a re-run of this episode on Netflix, and got the inspiration to write this. Tell me if its worth continuing please! Thanks.**_


	2. Chapter 2

"Why are you back here?" Mr. Clark demanded, pointing the gun at Lexie. She raised her hands slowly, but didn't reply.

"Answer the question." The man snarled coldly. He pushed the gun's barrel closer to her face and she backed up.

"I-I came in looking for Meredith, but then I found her." Lexie choked out. She gestured with her head back towards Alice, who was struggling to stop the bleeding on her own. Her hands shook quite violently as she stared at the man who had shot her.

"You said you only wanted to shoot Sheperd and Weber and I. Why'd you shoot her?" Lexie asked, trying to stall, though she had a feeling that the SWAT team wasn't going to intervene this time.

"It was an accident!" Mr. Clark nearly screamed. Lexie saw a tear stream down his face and decided to play on it.

"If you shoot me, she will _die _Mr. Clark. I'm her only chance to survive." Lexie told the man. His jaw locked and his eyes flickered from her to Alice.

"Ok. I won't shoot you now. But as soon as you're done saving that girl, I'm putting a bullet between your eyes." Mr. Clark said. He seemed to have regained his composure some.

Lexie nodded shakily, and then kneeled back down beside Alice, who had her hand pressed as firmly as she could against the bullet wound. Lexie's unsteady hands took over, and Alice was grateful for the break. Her breaths came out in little, labored pants that she struggled to control.

"How's she doing?" Mr. Clark asked after a few minutes of unbearably tense silence. He fidgeted with the gun's safety, clicking it back and forth anxiously.

"Um, the bleeding is started to slow, but if she doesn't get an IV…..she's probably not going to make it." Lexie answered truthfully. Alice's skin had become nearly ice cold, her lips were as white as her skin, and Lexie could tell it took a large effort just to keep breathing.

Lexie looked up from the wound just in time to see Alice's eyes flutter shut. "Alice! Alice, you need to stay with me." The young woman said, nudging Alice's head gently. The teenager's eyes shot back open and she stared up at Lexie.

"I thought you said I was probably going to die." The teenager's voice was barely audible and Lexie had to strain just to make out the words. Lexie bit her lip, and struggled to think of a response.

"That doesn't mean you get to stop trying." The doctor said, getting the last of the gauze and holding it to the wound. She took the small roll of medical tape and ripped a strip off. Soon Lexie had taped the gauze firmly over the bullet wound and then put one of the bandages over it.

"But I don't want to see you get shot." Alice said, looking up at Lexie, and then to Mr. Clark, who had continued to watch them in silence.

"You already shot me. If you shoot the woman who tried to save me, that's like a double sin. Please, don't." Alice continued. The words were barely above a whisper, but Mr. Clark heard them. To both Lexie and Alice's surprise, he raised the gun and pointed it at Dr. Grey.

"You told her to say it, didn't you?" He accused angrily.

Before Lexie could process what was happening, there was a gun barrel pressed her her head. "Please Mr. Clark!" She sobbed, letting the dam that was holding her tears back break and they ran down her face.

"You killed my wife, and you're letting this little girl die." He snarled, digging the barrel into her head. Lexie squeezed her eyes shut and waited for the shot, but Alice's voice was the only sound to be heard other than her whimpers.

"She's not the one letting me die; its you. You shot me, and if you shoot her, I die." Alice said, attempting to prop herself up her elbows, but failing to do so.

"Just leave." Alice pleaded. Just trying to sit up and left her even more exhausted than before, and her eyelids drooped.

Lexie sucked in a deep, unsteady breath as the gun barrel was removed from the back of her head. She wiped away at the tears and then turned to see Mr. Clark walking away from them. "Thank you so much." She said, turning back around to Alice.

"I can't-" The teenager's voice faded away and her eyes closed. Her body fell limp and her head lolled to the side.

"Alice! Open your eyes!" Lexie said frantically. She pressed her fingers to the girl's neck and found a pulse, though it was weak and slow. Alice had simply passed out. Unable to think of anything else to do, Lexie slapped Alice across the face, and her eyes shot open.

"Alice, you have to keep your eyes open, alright?" The doctor told the teenager.

Alice nodded and Lexie tried to give her a comforting smile. "Ok, good. I'm going to ask you some questions now, to keep you awake, ok? So, how old are you?" She asked her dying patient.

"15." Alice forced out. A series of chills ran through her body and she shivered.

"Ok, why were you hospitalized?" Lexie asked, struggling to think of questions. She knew the poor girl needed a transfusion, but if the SWAT team didn't come in the next 30 minutes, the teenager would most likely die of blood loss, and whatever other damage the bullet had caused.

"I broke 2 r-ribs in ch-cheerleading." She took gasps in between syllables. Lexie noticed the sweat that had formed on the 15 year old's skin, the series of tremors that ran through her body every couple minutes, and all the color had drained from her skin. Alice was going into shock.

_**Hey guys, thanks for the couple reviews. Keep it up! This is my first Grey's Anatomy story, and I'm not a doctor, so it probably won't be %100 medically accurate.**_


	3. Chapter 3

Lexie knew she needed to get Alice help, and fast. She looked around her for something she could move the poor girl with, and spotted the cart that she had taken gauze and the other supplies off of. Sighing, Lexie realized that it was her only option.

"Alice, I'm going to move you up onto the cart, and we're going to get out of here, ok?" Lexie told the teenager. Alice flickered her eyes towards her and nodded slightly. Her entire body was racked with tremors, and her jaw was locked.

Lexie wiped the empty bandage boxes and other debris off of the cart and turned back to Alice. "Come one." She said, putting an arm under the girl's back and pulling her up. Alice cried out and nearly fell back to the floor, but Lexie caught her in time and practically lifted her onto the cart.

Alice was a tall girl, so she was forced to sit up partially onto the cart. Her back rested against Lexie as the young doctor began pushing the cart down the hall. A whole new wave of pain had hit Alice from being moved, and she whimpered as the cart jostled her.

"It's going to be ok." Lexie told the 15 year old as they neared the elevator. When they finally stopped, Lexie pressed the down button. The frowned when it didn't light up, and she realized that the elevators were turned off.

"Shit." Lexie swore hopelessly. She slammed her palm up against the metal doors and looked down at the floor, defeated.

"Lexie! What the hell are you doing in here?" A loud voice echoed through the hall. The young doctor jumped and looked up to see Mark coming down the hall.

"I came in here looking for Meredith. But then I found her. She's shot Mark, we have to get her out of here." Lexie explained quickly, pointing to the cart Alice was sprawled out on.

Dr. Sloan immediately sprinted to the cart and started to inspect Alice's limp body. His eyes locked on the makeshift bandage Lexie had used. It was now soaked with blood and partially falling off.

"Lexie, she barely has a pulse." Mark said, pressing his fingers to the girl's neck.

"I know. Can you please just carry her down the stairs?" Lexie replied, looking at Alice worriedly. Her eyes had shut, yet she was still shaking violently.

Mark nodded and wrapped an arm around Alice's back and under her legs. He lifted her frail body up with little effort and then started towards the stairwell quickly. Lexie followed behind closely.

Sloan carried the dying girl down the stairs as quickly as he could and opened the door at the bottom with his back. He made it into the hospital lobby and Lexie ran in front of him to open the door. The two doctors and their patient emerged from the hospital.

Police started sprinting towards Mark and Lexie as soon as the exited the door. They escorted them to the nearest ambulance after seeing the pale, unconscious girl in Mark's arms. Two paramedics from the Presbyterian hospital immediately loaded Alice onto a stretcher and shut the ambulance doors before Lexie or Mark could climb in.

Lexie watched the ambulance drive away and then turned to Sloan. "You want to go to the hospital?" He asked, thinking more of Alex than the girl in the ambulance.

Lexie nodded and Mark led her towards his car. He opened the door for her and then hurried around to the driver's side. Sloan sped off in the direction of the hospital.

"So who are you going to check on first?" Mark asked as he flipped of the car that had just cut him off. Lexie looked up at him in surprise and her eyebrows scrunched together.

"I….I don't know." The young woman answered truthfully. Alex's face, contorted with pain, flashed into her mind and she felt herself wanting to see Alex. But, she took an oath, and even though she wasn't Alice's official doctor, she considered her a patient. And patients come first.

"Alice." Lexie answered. She watched Mark's face for a reaction. His eyebrows rose in surprise and he glanced at her.

"What, do you love her too?" He replied almost coldly.

"She saved my life Mark. Mr. Clark came back and pressed a gun to my head and she talked him out of it." Lexie snapped. She looked down at her bloodstained hands and clothes and prayed that Alice hadn't died on the way to the hospital.

Dr. Sloan didn't reply, and he and Lexie rode in silence the rest of the way. As he parked near the entrance to the hospital, Lexie ran out of the car and into the hospital.

Approaching the woman at the front desk, Lexie struggled to catch her breath. "A girl, Alice, was brought in, gunshot wound to the lower right side-." The woman cut her off.

"She's being treated right now. Why don't you take a seat in the waiting area." The woman said tiredly. It was obvious that she was tired with dealing with worried people from the shooting. Lexie scowled at her before going to sit down.

An hour passed before anyone came out into the waiting room. The doctor scanned the room and then finally spoke. "Is anyone here for the teenage girl with the gunshot wound?" He asked tiredly.

Lexie raised her hand and he looked surprised. "Aren't you a little young to be the mother to a teenager?" He asked skeptically.

"I'm not her mother; I'm the one who found her. Is she ok?" Lexie replied, too worried to confront the man about being so rude.

"We gave her a blood transfusion and sealed up the wound. She should be fine. You can see if if you wish. We haven't contacted her parents yet." He said, gesturing towards the elevator.

"Room 216." The man called after Lexie. She nodded and went towards the elevator.

_**Hey guys, thanks for the reviews. I put a bit of McSteamy in, cause I love him bunches and bunches haha. Please leave a review and I'll try to update again tomorrow.**_


	4. Chapter 4

Lexie pressed the second floor button and watched as the elevator doors closed. Once again, her mind wandered back to Alex, pictures flashing into her mind of him bleeding on the floor of the elevator. The doctor shook the memory from her head as the doors dinged and opened.

Lexie stepped out into the nearly empty hallway and began reading the room numbers. She finally got to the end of the hall, and came to room 216. Knocking lightly on the side of the door frame, Lexie poked her head in cautiously.

"Hey." Lexie said, seeing the Alice was awake. The teenager turned and looked at her in surprise.

"Hi." Alice replied softly. Her voice was hoarse and weak, but some of the color had returned to her face, and she was, well, awake.

"How're you feeling?" Lexie asked, sitting in the bedside chair. She inspected the heart monitor and was pleased with Alice's vitals.

"Do you want the whiny answer, or the lie?" Alice laughed softly, then winced.

"The whiny answer." Lexie laughed as well. The teenager was just so innocent, it was unthinkable that anyone had shot her.

"Then I feel like crap." Alice answered truthfully. Despite the mild pain medication she had received, the area around the bullet wound ached terribly at the slightest movement.

Lexie nodded and once again checked the monitor. The numbers hadn't changed; blood pressure was good and her heart beat was steady.

"That's like the second or third time you've checked that in the last minute." Alice noted. She fiddled with the IV that had been stuck in her hand and bit her cheek as the tape pulled on her skin.

"Just making sure you're alright." Lexie replied. She struggled with what she was going to say next.

"Alice, I wanted to thank you for saving me. If you hadn't talked him down, I'd be dead." Lexie finally managed to say. She had never had to thank anyone for saving her life obviously, and it was a lot harder than what you see in the movies.

"Well, you saved me too. I would have bled to death on the floor if you hadn't found me." Alice replied, actually blushing a bit. Lexie took that as a good sign and gave the girl a comforting smile.

"I guess we saved each other's lives then. Now, I'll be right back, I have to go check on one of my friends." Lexie said, knowing Alex would be wondering where she was.

Alice nodded and leaned back into the pillow. It was obvious that she was exhausted and Lexie knew she could use a long rest.

Lexie walked out into the hallway and remembered that she hadn't even asked about Alex. Unsure of where to go, she glanced around for a doctor, but instead heard someone yelling her name.

"Lexie! Lexie, in here!" Alex shouted from his hospital bed. He groaned in pain as the muscles around his bullet wound stretched.

The blonde haired doctor walked into Alex's hotel room and he smiled at her. "Where the hell did you go? I thought you were going to meet me at the hospital as soon as we got here." He demanded irritably. His mind was clouded from the pain medication and he winced again.

"I stayed to look for Meredith and I found this girl who Mr. Clark shot. I had to help her Alex." Lexie explained quickly. She could tell Alex wasn't himself.

"I'm sorry Alex, I have to go check on her." Lexie said, turning to leave. All she got in reply was a snore; Alex had fallen asleep.

Lexie returned to Alice's room to find her staring blankly in front of her. Her gaze broke as Lexie came through the door.

"You're back." Alice noted. She had been doing her best to ignore the aching in her side, but it was becoming unbearable.

"Just wanted to make sure you're ok." Lexie replied, smiling at her. She checked the heart monitor and then once again sat down in the bedside chair.

"Have your parents been notified?" The doctor asked after she had sat down. She watched as a trace of sadness flashed over Alice's face.

"They're in Pennsylvania visiting my sister at her college." Alice said in a quieter voice than she had been using. She averted her eyes from Lexie's and stared down at the bed.

"Oh. Do you have any other family in Seattle?" Lexie asked. Her eyebrows scrunched together in concern.

Alice shook her head and finally looked back up. "They'll be back next Thursday." She told the older woman. Lexie nodded, though her face still showed signs on worry.

Lexie knew that Alice would be discharged in at least 3 days, maybe 2. And what was she supposed to do, go home by herself and think about what had happened. The only thing keeping Lexie from obsessing about the day's events was her concern for Alice and Karev.

"So you're just going to go home when you're discharged, all by yourself?" Lexie asked, wanting to make sure. Alice nodded.

"I mean, what else am I supposed to do?" The teenager shrugged, then winced because of it.

"Well, if you want, you can stay with me. I don't think it's a good idea for you to stay by yourself after…..this." Lexie suggested carefully. She wasn't sure how Alice would react to the invitation.

"Really?" Alice asked. Her eyebrows rose when Lexie made the offer. She was beyond surprised.

Lexie nodded and smiled, then checked the monitor out of habit again. Alice smirked, then felt herself get hit with a wave of fatigue. Her eyelids drooped and she yawned. The 15 year old quickly dozed off, sinking back into the pillow.

Dr. Grey watched as the young girl fell asleep. Her vitals were stable, Alice herself seemed to be emotionally stable, and the hospital was crawling with nurses. But, Lexie couldn't bring herself to leave her. So, situated herself in the chair, and fell asleep herself.

_**So, what do you guys think? Do you think that Alice and Lexie should become close, and I should continue with their relationship, or just kind of have them drift apart? Any advice is certainly welcome! And please leave a review!**_


	5. Chapter 5

Lexie woke up to the sound of whimpers. She sat up in the less than comfortable chair she had slept in, and rubbed her eyes. It took her a couple of seconds to realize that the soft whimpers were coming from Alice, who was still asleep in the bed.

"Alice, wake up." Lexie said, putting a hand on the teenager's shoulder. Alice's eyes shot open and she looked around, confused, for a few seconds before finally calming down.

"Sorry." Alice said. She attempted to sit up, having forgotten about her injury, but was reminded as pain flared up her side. She groaned quietly and waited for the pain to fade.

"It's fine. Are you ok?" Lexie asked, smiling, though there was still concern etched across her face. She had seen the look of fear on Alice's face just before she had woken up.

"I'm alright; it was just like….a flashback dream. Wait, have you been here all night?" Alice raised an eyebrow in surprise.

Lexie nodded almost sheepishly and looked at the time; 8:36 in the morning. Her thoughts were interrupted as a nurse walked in. Lexie stepped back and let her do her work.

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><p>The next two days were uneventful, but actually pleasant. Lexie spent most of her time in Alice's room, only slipping out when the girl was sleeping to check on Alex. The two girls got to know each other and found that they got along well. Alice was a very bright girl and actually very interested in surgery. Lexie spent hours describing some of the more unique cases the hospital had dealt with, like the woman who had cardiomyopathy and lived without a heart for six weeks. They shared many of the same interests, like horror movies, cheerleading, and the same bands. Alice was mature for her age, and Lexie found herself enjoying her company.<p>

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><p>On the third day in the hospital, the nurses had contacted Alice's parents and she had been discharged. Lexie brought her a pair of scrubs to wear until she could pick up clothing from her house. The two girls walked down the hallway together, heading for the hospital lobby.<p>

"I feel like a doctor." Alice noted as she walked next to Lexie. The older of the two laughed and nodded her head.

Lexie and Alice made it out into the parking lot and to Lexie's car, which Mark had driven. He sat in the driver's seat, parked outside the hospital entrance. Lexie climbed into the passenger seat while Alice got into the back. Mark pulled out onto the road and started following Alice's directions to her house.

Lexie and Mark sat in the car alone, waiting for Alice to finish packing a bag. "Lexie, I'm sorry about what I said." He apologized. Lexie looked up at him and gave him a small smile.

"It's ok." The doctor replied. Mark nodded, though he could tell she had still been hurt. Before the conversation could evolve, they heard the front door to Alice's house shut and she came walking out with a large duffel bag slung over her shoulder.

Alice climbed back in the car and Mark took off again. The car was strangely silent now that Alice wasn't giving directions, so the teenager decided to try to make conversation.

"So, Dr. Sloan, what kind of a surgeon are you?" She asked, relaxing in the seat. His eyes flickered to her's in the rear view mirror before he answered.

"I specialize in plastics." The man replied. He nearly missed his turn and jerked the wheel to the side.

"So like nose jobs and stuff?" She asked.

Mark chuckled a bit and shook his head. "I've given a man a face after his was destroyed. But yes, I have done a lot of nose jobs."

"I bet you get a lot of clients because you're so pretty yourself." She laughed.

Mark did one of his booming laughs and Lexie felt her stomach do a flip. Her face reddened and she turned to look out the window so that no one noticed.

"Well, here we are." Mark said, pressing on the breaks. The car came to a stop and all three got out of the vehicle.

"Bye Dr. Sloan." Alice said, smiling at the surgeon. He grinned back and then turned to Lexie. Before she could react, he pulled her into a hug, and then turned to go back to his own car.

Lexie led Alice up onto the porch of the house, still able to feel Mark's touch, and started to open the door when his voice rang out behind them again.

"And Alice. You might want to consider becoming a surgeon, because the scrubs really suit you." Sloan yelled from his car.

Alice laughed and then followed Lexie into the house.

"Hi." Dr. Kepner said as she met Lexie and Alice at the door. She extended her hand towards Alice and Lexie gave her an odd look.

"Hi. I'm Alice." The teenager said, shaking the woman's hand.

"Alice, this is Dr. Kepner." Lexie introduced her. She could tell that April was still on edge, and wondered how long it would take for her to calm down a bit.

"Please, call me April." Dr. Kepner corrected Lexie. Alice nodded and April turned around and returned to what Alice guessed was the kitchen.

"Well, you can come put your stuff up here." Lexie said, starting up the staircase. Alice followed close behind, moving gingerly so she wouldn't jar the healing bullet wound.

Alice followed Lexie into her room and set her duffel bag in the corner. She realized a sharp breath as her injured side was stretched and Lexie frowned.

"Are you alright?" The older of the two asked, worry painted on her face. Alice nodded and grimaced, waiting for the intensity of the pain to decrease.

"Lexie, are you ok? I mean, you've been so concerned about me, but you had a gun pointed at your head." Alice asked suddenly. She looked at Lexie, searching her eyes for an answer.

"Yeah, don't worry about me. I'm fine." Lexie replied. It was a lie.

_**Hey guys. I put some Slexie in again . And also some Alice/Mark friendship because again, I love him. So, what do you guys think so far? Please leave a review. I love getting advice and suggestions and hearing what you guys want to happen next. :D**_


	6. Chapter 6

"Well, I'll leave you alone to get changed. April and I will be in the kitchen if you want to come down." Lexie said, walking towards the door. Alice nodded and Lexie closed the door behind her as she left.

Though the scrubs were comfortable, Alice was happy to get back into normal clothes. Before she pulled her t-shirt over her head, she stared at herself in the mirror. There was a large bandage over the bullet wound and she wondered how long it would take for it to heal. As Alice put her shirt on, she was forced to stretch the muscles in her side and then groaned as the injury protested.

After changing into a pair of jeans as well, Alice opened the door and ventured downstairs. She could hear voices from the kitchen, and followed them, as she didn't exactly know the layout of the house yet.

"Hey." Alice said as she walked into the kitchen. Lexie smiled at her and gestured to the bar stool beside her. Alice crawled up onto it with a little pain, and then relaxed as she finally got situated.

"Do you want any tea, or anything?" Lexie offered as April left the kitchen to be by herself. Alice didn't take offence, as it was obvious she was still incredibly shaken by what had happened.

"Tea sounds good, yeah." Alice replied as she watched Dr. Kepner leave. She had never hung out with adults much, and she tried desperately not to be around her parents much. As if on queue, Lexie opened her mouth.

"So what's your family like?" Dr. Grey asked as she turned the stove burner on. She set a kettle on the heated burner and then started searching the cupboards for tea bags.

"Uh, there's not really much to say. We don't…..get along." Alice said quietly. Her voice had gotten smaller, and she averted her eyes from Lexie's. She had felt guilty for lying to her ever since the shooting, and knew she couldn't keep it up any longer if she was going to be living with the woman for awhile.

"Lexie, I lied to you earlier, when you asked me why I was in the hospital. I didn't break my ribs in cheerleading." Alice blurted out. Lexie looked up in surprise at the sudden outburst and raised one of her eyebrows.

"Then how'd you break them?" Lexie asked, though she wasn't exactly sure she wanted to hear the answer. She had noticed the sudden change in mood when she had asked about Alice's parents.

"My mother….she pushed me down the stairs." Alice admitted. Lexie was the first person she had ever told about her parents.

Dr. Grey's eyebrows raised and then she frowned. "Oh my God." She murmured as the tea kettle started whistling.

"But she was drunk, and she's schizophrenic, so she doesn't always know what she's doing." Alice said quickly. Her mother wasn't actually schizophrenic, just bipolar, but she needed to make the woman seem more innocent. She didn't want to be put in a foster home, though Alice knew staying with her parents wasn't a good or safe idea.

"Alice, if they're hurting you, you can get help." Lexie told the teenager. Alice shook her head and gave her a small smile.

"It's always been like this. I'll be out of the house in a few years." Again, Alice felt like she was lying by not telling the entire truth about how terrible her home life was.

Lexie gave Alice a sympathetic look, but she didn't press for any more information. She knew if someone came and tried to ask her about her dad, she would get defensive too.

Lexie made two mugs of tea and set one of them in front of Alice, who seemed lost in her own thoughts. Slowly, the teenager lifted the steaming beverage to her lips and took a sip, seemingly unaware of how hot it was.

The two girls drank their tea in silence that was suddenly interrupted by the front door opening. Footsteps sounded through the house and both Lexie and Alice watched the doorway to see who would walk through. Surprisingly, it was Meredith.

"What are you doing here?" Lexie asked in surprise. She figured Meredith wouldn't be home until Derek was.

"Derek insisted I got home and get clothes. Who's this?" The older of the sisters asked, eyeing Alice.

"This is Alice. Alice, this is my sister Meredith." Lexie introduced the two. Alice seemed to break out of her trance and shook Meredith's hand.

"Alice got shot, but her parents are out of town, so I told her that she could stay here until they could get back. Plus she kind of saved my life." Lexie explained further. Meredith nodded, smiled at Alice, and then went upstairs.

"Well, at least you and your sister get along." Alice said once Meredith had left. Lexie laughed quietly.

"Not always." Dr. Grey told the younger girl. Alice smirked somewhat bitterly and then sipped at her tea again.

The rest of the day was spent talking about various subjects and watching the news stories about the shooting. Alice's family was not brought up again, but she seemed to remain somewhat troubled throughout the day. Lexie was battling her own mind as it began to think more and more about the shooting. She kept thinking that she had heard gunshots, but of course, she hadn't.

Night finally rolled around and both Lexie and Alice were exhausted. They had both changed into pajamas and completed their nightly routines, and now sat in Lexie's room.

"Well, I'll be down on the couch if you need me. Goodnight." Lexie said. She grabbed a pillow and blanket and started towards the door.

"Night." Alice replied quietly. She crawled into the freshly made bed and shut her eyes as Lexie turned off the lights.

Lexie stared at the ceiling and then turned to the clock. It was three in the morning and she hadn't slept a wink. A soft noise caught her attention, though she doubted its existence for a few seconds. But it was definitely there, and she got up off of the couch, paranoid thoughts creeping into her mind.

Realizing it was coming from her room, Lexie crept up the stairs and slowly opened the door. She squinted in the darkness and saw Alice on the bed, her face contorted with distress and scared murmurs coming from her mouth.

"Alice, it's ok. Wake up." Lexie whispered loudly. She gently shook Alice, and the teenager's eyes flashed open. Her breathing was ragged and it took her awhile to collect herself.

"Sorry." Alice finally managed to get out. She wiped at the sweat on her forehead and sighed.

"It's fine." Lexie assured the younger girl. She turned to leave, but was stopped.

"Lexie? Will you stay?" Alice asked hesitantly. The dark thoughts that infested her dreams were already coming back, and she couldn't stand the thought of being alone again.

Lexie nodded, actually glad she would have someone to lie next to. She slid into bed next to Alice, and the two girls attempted to find sleep again.

_**So, should Alice actually tell Lexie how bad her home life is? Or should she keep hiding it? Again, suggestions are welcome and I would like to thank BekaRoo for her contributions to the story. Review!**_


	7. Chapter 7

Lexie listened to Alice's steady breathing as she tried to sleep herself. But she knew her insomnia wouldn't allow it, especially because of what had happened. So she focused on what Alice had said earlier about her mother. Lexie had noticed the bitter smile, change in personality, and general upsetness that had come when she asked about Alice's family. So maybe the mother wasn't the only one hurting her.

By the time morning came, Lexie had still not slept, and she knew she wasn't going to. So, she got up quietly, careful not to wake up Alice, and went downstairs. She started the coffee pot and rooted around the kitchen for something to make breakfast. Her mind was still racing, and she desperately tried to distract herself while cooking, but it was no use.

Lexie looked up from the sizzling pan on the stove to see Alice stumble into the kitchen sleepily. She rubbed her eyes and took a seat at the counter.

"Morning." Alice yawned, still trying to blink the sleep away from her eyes.

"Morning." Lexie replied, forcing a small smile.

"How're you feeling?" Lexie asked, gesturing to the gunshot wound. She then quickly stirred the hash browns that were frying in the skillet.

"Sore." Alice answered truthfully. Her side ached at the slightest movement, though she tried hard not to show it.

Lexie couldn't allow the odd tension to go on any longer in the room. "Alice, are you being abused?" She blurted out. Alice looked up in surprise, and maybe fear, before shaking her head.

"Lexie, seriously, don't worry about it. My mother has problems, but I've lived with them my entire life. It's not a big deal." Alice said quickly. She looked up at Lexie.

"What about your father?" Dr. Grey asked as she emptied the skillet onto a plate. She handed Alice a plate of eggs, hash browns, and sausage.

Alice dropped her gaze from Lexie's and bit her lips. "He's…..he's kind of an alcoholic. They both are. And yeah, sometimes when he's mad, he hits me." That was a lie. It wasn't just when he was mad, it was every day, for reasons Alice couldn't figure out half the time.

"My dad's an alcoholic too. If you need help, you have to tell me Alice." Lexie nearly pleaded. She had a feeling that there were other scars and injuries from the girl's parents that she couldn't see, and knew Alice wouldn't tell her about.

"Lexie, its fine. Can we please drop this?" Alice said. It was obvious she had never told anyone about her parents and was getting upset and uncomfortable.

Lexie nodded and the two girls ate their breakfast in silence.

* * *

><p>Lexie and Alice were cleaning up the breakfast dishes when they heard a knock at the door. The older of the two put down the plate she was carrying and went to the front door. Her stomach flipped when she saw Mark standing on the porch.<p>

"Hi. What are you doing here?" Lexie asked nervously. She felt heat rush to her face as the smell of his cologne hit her.

"Just wanted to check on Alice. Is she up?" The handsome man asked. Lexie simply nodded and let him into the house, surprised at his concern.

"Dr. Sloan, hi." Alice greeted the man as he came into the kitchen. He smiled and waved before sitting down at the counter.

"I just wanted to stop by, see how you're doing. You feeling ok?" Mark said, emitting the part where he had wanted to check up on Lexie too.

"Yeah, it still hurts of course. But I'll survive." Alice told the older man. She liked Dr. Sloan. Not only was he handsome, but she could tell he cared about her. And Lexie.

Since Lexie had disappeared, Mark took his chance. "Is Lexie doing alright?" He lowered his voice and leaned in towards Alice.

"She says she is, but I don't think she slept at all last night." Alice replied quietly. She herself was worried about the older girl.

Before Mark and Alice could talk anymore, they heard footsteps coming towards them. Lexie entered the kitchen and looked at them curiously. "What?" She asked when she noticed Mark staring at her.

"Nothing." The doctor replied quickly, averting his eyes. But he had noticed how exhausted Lexie looked. Her eyes were bloodshot and drooping, and she was slightly hunched over, something he knew she only did when she was tired.

"Well, I better get going. I just wanted to stop by." Sloan said, standing up from the bar stool. He wrapped Alice in a gentle hug and whispered into her ear. "Keep an eye on her and call me if you need to."

Alice nodded slightly as she and Sloan leaned back from the hug. He gave her a small smile before turning to Lexie.

Lexie smiled unconvincingly at Mark as he walked past her, barely unable to keep from pulling her into a hug. But he forced himself to walk out the door, out onto the street.

"So do you like him?" Alice asked as soon as she heard the door shut. Lexie looked at her in surprise.

"What? No! Well not anymore-." Lexie sputtered out.

Alice looked at Lexie skeptically and raised an eyebrow. Lexie sighed and sat down next to her at the counter.

"We used to be together, but…long story short, we broke up. But yes, I still like him." Lexie admitted.

"That's what I thought. Why don't you tell him that?" Alice continued.

"I can't. He doesn't care about me anymore. Plus I have Alex." Lexie said sadly. She had nearly forgotten about Alex.

"I wouldn't be so sure about that." Alice said, smirking a bit. Lexie looked at her curiously and then blushed.

_**Hey guys, first of all, thanks for all the reviews. I'm still on the fence of having Alice admit that she does need help, because I think it would be interesting to see Lexie have to force Alice to let her help, or call Social Services without Alice asking her too or something. And do you guys like the Mark/Alice friendship? Anyways, review!**_


	8. Chapter 8

Lexie and Alice hung around the house for a few hours, watching movies and talking about everything but Alice's family and Mark. Lexie realized that if she tried to talk to Alice about her family, the younger girl would bring up Mark. So the doctor kept her mouth shut about the girl's family and Alice didn't mention Mark.

The sound of the door opening silenced the conversation Alice and Lexie were having as they sat on the couch. Lexie prayed to God that it wasn't Mark, and to her relief, it was Jackson.

"Where've you been?" Lexie asked, standing up from the couch. She hugged him, having not seen him since before the shooting.

"I had to go home to visit my mom; she was going crazy after she saw it on the news." Dr. Avery said, hugging Lexie back. He wished he could hold her a little longer, but the young woman pulled out from the hug after a few seconds.

"Who's this?" Jackson asked, turning to Alice. She smiled and waved despite the pain it brought.

"This is Alice. She was shot, and she saved my life." Lexie had to admit she was tired of explaining Alice's presence in the house.

"Nice to meet you." Jackson said, outreaching his hand. Alice shook it and smiled again.

"I was going to watch some of Meredith's mom's old surgery tapes, but I see you two are having a Scream marathon." The doctor said, noticing the Ghost-face killer on the TV.

"Surgery tapes?" Alice asked, obviously interested. She raised an eyebrow.

"Yeah. You interested?" Jackson asked, taking down a cardboard box from above the TV. He opened it and began sorting out old VHS tapes.

Alice nodded and Lexie smiled. The girl seemed to get along with _everyone. _She was friendly, not shy in the least, and was definitely mature for her age.

Jackson found his favorite and stood up. "In this one, she removes a tumor the size of baseball from some lady's small bowel." He said excitedly, popping the tape into the VCR. The old machine whirred and then pressed play.

Jackson plopped down on the couch next to Alice and switched the input on the TV. An overhead view of an operating table appeared on the screen, and the three settled in to watch the surgery.

* * *

><p>In two hours, the tape finally finished as the first Dr. Grey finished stitching the woman up. Jackson stood up and turned off the VCR while yawning. Alice stood up and stretched absent mindedly and then yelled out in pain.<p>

Lexie and Jackson immediately rushed to Alice's side as she collapsed back down onto the couch.

"Did your wound reopen?" Lexie asked frantically as she rolled up Alice's t-shirt. The pain plagued teenager shook her head, but Lexie still pulled the bandage off. However, the pulled wound had not reopened, and appeared to actually be healing well. It was when Lexie remembered the reason Alice had originally been hospitalized that she realized what had happened.

"Call Torres." Lexie told Jackson as he stared at Alice in concern. He looked up at Lexie, confused, but followed her instructions.

* * *

><p>Callie Torres frowned as her phone rang. Mark looked up at her from his spot on the couch and raised his eyebrows.<p>

"Hello?" Callie answered the phone, holding it between her shoulder and ear as she cut green onions for the dinner she was making. Arizona walked into the kitchen and was about to speak when she saw her girlfriend was on the phone.

"What? Okay, I'll be there soon." Dr. Torres replied, still unsure of what was needed of her.

"Where are you going?" Arizona asked as she sat down next to Mark and stole the remote.

"Grey's. I guess they have a kid there who needs a rib set or something. I really don't-" Callie was cut off as Mark leapt up from the couch.

"Alice." The man said to himself, walking towards the door. He pulled his shoes and coat on quickly.

"If there's a kid, I'm going." Arizona said definitely. She got up from the couch as well and followed in Mark's footsteps.

Callie shrugged and then pulled her shoes and a jacket on. Mark was already halfway down the hall and shouting for them to hurry up and Arizona was looking at him curiously for the doorway. Finally, all three doctors were on their way.

* * *

><p>Lexie held Alice's hand as the girl struggled to control her breathing. All of the pain made her body practically need to pant, but if she inhaled too deeply, the broken rib that had shifted out of place lit up with pain. Also, it risked puncturing a lung. Sadly, Alice couldn't control herself and sucked in a large breath and cried out in result, squeezing Lexie's hand. Lexie bit her lip and held back tears as Alice's cries of pain reminded her of the day in the hospital.<p>

* * *

><p>Mark drove <em>recklessly <em>to Grey's house and the trio made it there in 17 minutes; a new record. He bolted out of the car and nearly tripped racing up the porch steps. Without knocking, Sloan burst through the door into the living room.

Callie and Arizona hurried in after Mark into the house. He hadn't said a work on the way there, but they could tell he was incredibly worried. As they made their way into the house, they were surprised to see a teenager girl, obviously in pain, and were even more surprised to see Mark stroking a strand of hair out of her face.

"She was hospitalized for broken ribs about a week ago and one of them just shifted out of place. I mean, you can literally _see _it." Lexie said, looking up from Alice. Callie and Arizona nodded and then walked over to be beside Alice.

"Hi, I'm Dr. Torres." Callie said, giving the poor girl a comforting smile. Alice didn't make an attempt to return it, just nodded and forced her own name out.

"Ok, Alice. I'm going to need to push it back into place. If you want pain meds, we can take you to the hospital-" Callie was cut off.

"No. No hospital." Alice said between sharp breaths. She locked her jaw and prepared herself for the pain. Mark and Lexie both took a hold of each of her hands and stole worried glances off of each other.

"Alright, on the count of three. One, tw-" Callie pushed the rib back into place, catching Alice off guard. The teenager yelled out, but then relaxed as the pain began to fade.

_**Well, that's kind of a weird place to stop, but at least its not a cliffhanger! Please review!**_


	9. Chapter 9

"Better?" Callie asked, standing up straight. Alice nodded and her breathing slowed as the pain faded. Gingerly, Mark helped her to sit up, guiding her forward with a hand on her lower back. Alice smiled at him and he returned the action.

"Thanks." Alice said breathlessly. A thing sheet of sweat layered her forehead, and her face had been drained of color.

"No problem. But you should probably get some ice on that." Dr. Torres replied, turning to Lexie. The younger woman immediately went into the kitchen and returned with a bag of ice wrapped in a towel. Alice took it and pressed it gently to her side. The cold soon began to numb the injured area and she relaxed.

After a couple of moments, Alice stood up slowly. The doctors watched her nervously, but the teenager seemed to be alright.

"Anyone want coffee?" Lexie offered. All of the doctors, and Alice, nodded and followed her into the kitchen.

"Are you sure you're alright?" Sloan asked quietly as he came up behind Alice. The 15 year old nodded and he squeezed her shoulder comfortingly.

Alice and Mark sat at the counter, while Lexie, Jackson, Arizona, and Callie sat at the table, waiting for the coffee to brew.

"So, Alice. Who are you?" Arizona asked finally. She and Callie had felt completely lost from the moment they stepped into the house.

"Well, I'm the one patient that got shot. And Lexie saved me, and she's letting me stay with her until my, um, parents get back in town." Alice explained, rolling up her t-shirt so Arizona could see the bandage.

"Nice to meet you." The blonde woman smiled.

Lexie had gotten up and set mugs down in front of everybody. She poured steaming coffee into all of them, then set the cream and sugar down on the table. Everyone made their drink to their liking and drank them in a comfortable silence.

After the coffee had been drunk, Callie, Arizona, and Mark stood up to leave. They walked back towards the front door, with Alice, Lexie, and Jackson following.

Mark pulled his coat on and then turned to Alice. He wrapped his arms around her, gently, and then leaned down slightly.

"Is she doing alright?" He barely whispered. Alice shrugged honestly and Sloan nodded, slightly worried.

Alice waved goodbye to the other two doctors as they left after thanking them once again. After the three adults had left, Jackson said he was going to bed and gave both Alice and Lexie a quick hug. The girls also decided to go to bed.

After Alice and Lexie both changed and did their nightly routines, they sat in Lexie's bedroom. The doctor gently peeled the bandage off of Alice's side and inspected After the three adults had left, Jackson said he was going to bed and gave both Alice and Lexie a quick hug. The girls also decided to go to bed.

After Alice and Lexie both changed and did their nightly routines, they sat in Lexie's bedroom. The doctor got out gloves, anti-bacterial cream and new bandages, then sat down on the bed next to Alice.

Lexie gently applied the cream, and then the bandages. As she was finishing up, Alice opened her mouth.

"It's a good thing I'm staying with you, or I'd have to do all this crap myself." The teenager said. Lexie chuckled and smoothed the bandage gently over the girl's skin.

"How much longer until your parents get back?" Lexie asked, rolling Alice's shirt back down and standing up to throw away the gloves and bandage packaging.

"Two days." Alice said. There was obvious disappointment and anxiety in her voice, though she tried hard not to show it.

Lexie nearly grimaced, then nodded. She honestly knew it would be hard for her to say goodbye to the teenager, especially knowing that she would be going home to a potentially dangerous household after a traumatizing event. But also because she felt…comfortable with Alice around. The girl had begun to seem like a sister, maybe even a daughter to Lexie.

Alice crawled under the blankets in the bed and yawned. Her rib still ached, though not nearly as bad as before Dr. Torres had pushed it back into place.

"So do you want me to stay, or go back down?" Lexie asked, remembering the events of the previous nights. It truly didn't matter where she went, since she knew she wasn't going to get any sleep anyway.

"Here." Alice said, almost bashfully. Lexie smiled at her, then climbed into bed next to her after turning the lights off.

* * *

><p>Lexie had stared at the ceiling for three hours. The only sound in the room was Alice's quiet breathing. Suddenly, the breathing quickened and Lexie snapped her head to the side to look at the teenager.<p>

Alice's face was scrunched together with distress, and she whimpered softly in her sleep. Lexie didn't wake her just yet; she had an idea that she wanted to check.

The whimpers gradually got louder, and unidentified words began to mix in with them. So far, Lexie had been able to make out "mom" and "please". She knew she would have to wake Alice soon, before everyone else awoke as well.

"Stop!" Alice shouted. Lexie didn't have to wake her; the teenager shot up in bed and her eyes searched the room frantically.

Lexie sat up next to Alice and rubbed her back soothingly. Alice waited until she had gotten her breathing under control before she spoke.

"Don't let me go back home."

_**Will Lexie try to get custody or something of Alice? Will Mark find out about her home life? Will he also fight for her? Will Lexie ever be able to sleep? Leave some reviews to find out!**_


	10. Chapter 10

Alice lifted her head to look at Lexie, who was shocked. She struggled to think of something to say, something comforting, but realistic.

"Do you want me to call Social Services? They could help you." Lexie offered, turning on the bedside lamp.

"I….I don't know. I don't want to be in foster care and get thrown around." Alice said, pushing the hair out of her eyes.

"You know what, just forget it. It was just a nightmare, I'll be fine." Alice said before Lexie could offer any other help.

"Alice, are you sure? If you really need help, we can get you a social worker or something." Lexie said. She was still skeptical about the way Alice had suddenly denied needing help. It didn't make sense.

"I just had a nightmare, it's nothing." Alice smiled weakly. Lexie nodded, somewhat regretfully, and yawned. She was _so _tired, but her mind just wouldn't let her sleep. Every time she closed her eyes, she saw Mr. Clark, pointing his gun at her. Sometimes she saw Alice, bleeding on the floor. She had grown so fond of the younger girl that it sent chills down her spine to think about her that close to death.

Alice leaned back into the pillow and suppressed a yawn. She wondered if Lexie had slept at all, and knew she needed to ask, for Mark's sake.

Just after Lexie turned the lamp off, Alice rolled over to look at her. "Lexie, are you sleeping ok?" She asked.

Lexie's eyes widened in the darkness, and she decided to lie. Alice didn't need to worry about if she was getting enough hours of sleep a night.

"Yeah, fine. I just woke up when I heard you." The older woman lied. She wished she could see Alice's face, just to know if the girl had bought what she was saying.

"Ok. Just wondering." Lexie tried to read Alice's voice, but she couldn't.

Eventually, Alice drifted off to sleep again, leaving Lexie alone with her own thoughts. She stared at the ceiling and did her best to block the dark thoughts for the rest of the night.

* * *

><p>Like the morning before, Lexie slid out of bed before Alice woke up. She got a shower, pulled her hair back into a bun, and went down into the kitchen. She was surprised to see Jackson and Alice together, cooking breakfast.<p>

"You have to check before you flip it. I thought surgeons were supposed to be good with this kind of stuff." Alice laughed as Jackson flipped a pancake before it had cooked completely, and it fell apart.

Jackson chuckled as he scraped the mess out of the pan. Alice grabbed the spatula from him and started flipping the other pancakes in the skillet before the older man could ruin them as well.

"Morning Lexie." Alice smiled, making sure to have it look like nothing had happened. She stirred the eggs frying in the other pan and then tended to the sausage in another. It was obvious the girl was used to cooking, maybe for her parents.

Jackson and Alice finished up in a couple of minutes and then set plates full of food down onto the table.

"Kepner! Come down and eat!" Jackson yelled towards the staircase. A few moments later, the surgeon came down the stairs looking unrested and not very sociable.

April sat down at the table and gave Alice a tiny smile, though she could tell there was a lot of effort behind it, and then fixed her plate in silence.

"So Alice, how long are you staying with us?" Jackson asked after he swallowed the food in his mouth.

"My parents get back in town tomorrow." The young girl said, masking the nervousness in her voice. Lexie still detected a trace of it though and exchanged a look with her.

Breakfast was soon finished and everyone cleaned up their dishes. Lexie and Alice were the last ones in the kitchen, as Kepner had retreated back to her room and Jackson had gone out to do some grocery shopping.

"You have to promise to call me if you need anything after you leave, Alice. I can't be stuck here after you leave wondering if you're alright." Lexie told the teenager. Alice turned to look at her.

"I'll try Lexie, I promise. But you have to promise that if you're having trouble, you'll call Mark. He cares about you Lexie, a lot. He asked me to keep an eye on you." Alice replied.

Lexie's cheeks turned red at the mention of Mark, but she nodded nonetheless. Alice gave a small smile before wincing as she stretched to put a plate away on the top shelf. Lexie frowned and wondered how the girl would do once she was back with her parents.

* * *

><p>Lexie and Alice spent the rest of the day together, both of them anxious about the arrival of Alice's parents. They were set to pick her up at 5:00, and soon enough, there was only a few minutes left before the hour.<p>

The two girls sat in Lexie's room, finishing packing Alice's duffel bag back up. Mark was in the living room with Jackson and Kepner, waiting. At last, everything had been stuffed into the bag and Alice picked it up, despite the strain it put on her side.

Lexie and Alice walked out to the living room together. Alice sat her bag down by the door and the turned to the surgeons in the room.

Jackson hugged Alice first, finding that even though he hadn't spent too much time with the girl, he knew he would miss her. Kepner hugged the girl next, though it was hesitant considering she hadn't spoken with her more than twice. Mark stepped up and pulled her into an enveloping hug, and they stayed in it for a couple of lingering moments. She sniffed and she looked up at him in surprise to see him quickly rubbing his eyes. She smiled sweetly at him before turning at the sound of a car.

A car was visible as it pulled out outside of the Grey residence. It honked its horn a few times and Alice rolled her eyes. Lastly, she turned to Lexie. The woman wrapped her arms around Alice and hugged it tightly. "Thank you. For everything." Alice whispered, feeling a lump form in her throat and then choking it down.

Lexie smiled a teary smile as they both leaned back from the hug. She picked the bag up off of the floor, gave everyone a final wave, and then walked out of the house.

_**Hey guys. So that was a little sad. Do you think Alice will keep in touch with Lexie? And how will Lexie be now that she's gone? And most importantly, will Alice be ok at home? Review to find out!**_


	11. Chapter 11

Alice walked off of the porch towards the waiting car and braced herself. She had been dreading this moment for days and tried to take her time getting there. But, eventually she made it and crawled into the backseat.

Lexie watched through the window as Alice got into the car. After a few seconds the vehicle pulled away from the curb and started down the street. The woman forced herself to break her gaze and then turned around to face the other people in her house.

"You ok?" Mark asked, stepping towards her. He himself had a hard time letting the younger girl walk out of the house.

Lexie nodded and bit her lip. She walked around the taller man, to the stairs, and then hurried up them. Tears were welling in her eyes, as she now felt truly alone for the first time since the shooting.

* * *

><p>The car was deafeningly silent as it rolled down the street. Alice sat in the back, eyes fixed to the floor, rubbing her side absentmindedly. She could literally <em>smell <em>the booze on her father as he sat in the passenger seat, though she wasn't surprised. Lexie kept flashing into the young girl's mind, and she was filled with concern about her. Alice prayed Mark would be able to look after her.

Soon enough, the car pulled up to Alice's house, and she was the first one out of the car. Thunder clouds had begun to form in the sky and Alice smirked at the suiting weather. She hurried into the house, biting her cheek as her side lit up in pain.

As soon as the teenager entered her house, she ran up to her room as fast as she could without causing herself too much pain. She made it to her room and closed the door behind her. It wasn't much; just a mattress on the floor and small table and a chair in the corner.

Alice sat down on her mattress and sighed. Her ribs still ached from being pushed down the stairs, leading her to wonder what kind of mood her mother was in today. The woman had been quiet in the car, which normally meant that she wouldn't be much trouble. But Alice had learned at a young age not to trust her mother's ever changing moods.

* * *

><p>Evening came for both Lexie and Alice, and they were forced to get ready for their first night away from each other. They completed their nightly routines slowly, almost uncaringly. Alice finally realized that she needed to eat if she was going to keep her strength up in order to heal. So, she crept down the stairs and entered the kitchen.<p>

Alice kept her vision focuses straight ahead as she passed both her mother and father, who were sitting at the kitchen table. She opened the refrigerator and pushed aside beer bottles.

Alice jumped as her father leapt up out of her chair. He was clutching a letter in his hand tightly and a vein was popping out in his forehead. The man grabbed his daughter by the shirt and shoved the paper in her face.

"Do you see how much your little accident cost us?" He bellowed. Alice couldn't make out the entire number, considering the paper was being shoved in her face, but she did see a lot of zeros.

"I'm sorry." Alice said immediately, though she didn't mean it. She didn't have one bit of regret for going to the hospital after her mother had pushed her down the steps. Sure, she had gotten shot, but she also met Lexie.

Alice's father threw the paper down and then slammed the refrigerator door shut. "After costing us that much money, you think we can afford to feed your fat mouth?" He shouted. Alice gagged on the smell of alcohol on his breath.

"But I'm sure you'll be able to buy all your booze." She muttered, the instantly wished she hadn't. Her father's face turned a whole new shade of red and he raised his hand. Before Alice had dodged it, the man's fist crashed against her cheekbone and she yelped in pain.

Alice's father released his grip on her shirt and the girl staggered backwards, clutching her cheek. She turned to see her mother watching almost contently from the table.

"Get up to your room. _Now_." The man growled. Alice turned, still cradling her cheek sensitively, and hurried towards the steps.

* * *

><p>Alice slammed the door to her room shut and sat down on the mattress. Her eyes had started watering as soon as she had left the kitchen, but she had kept the tears at bay until she was behind the door of her room.<p>

* * *

><p>Lexie stared at the ceiling of her room and bit the inside of her cheek. The bed felt cold and empty without Alice's presence. And all Lexie could do was think about if the girl was alright, and what her parents had said, and if she was taking care of the wound, and if the ribs were healing alright, and flashbacks of what had happened in the hospital. Lexie tried to stop the racing thoughts, but she knew she wouldn't be able to control them.<p>

* * *

><p>Alice quit the tears and got under the one blanket on her bed. She wrapped it around herself, but couldn't seem to get rid of the cold, empty feeling. She knew it was because of not having Lexie next to her and found herself wondering about the woman. Would she be able to sleep at all tonight? And would Mark keep his word and look after her?<p>

_**Hey guys, please leave some reviews! Thanks!**_


	12. Chapter 12

One week went by. Then two. Then three. And still, Lexie hadn't gotten one single call, or letter, or text from Alice. The girl had simply dropped off the face of the earth. Lexie had even driven past her house a couple of times in hope of her being out in the front yard, but she never saw a trace of her.

Lexie hadn't slept more than a couple hours combined in the three weeks. She stared at the ceiling in bed all night and thought about Alice, and Mr. Clark, and Sloan. The thoughts _never _stopped. And now, she could add another thing to be stressed about, considering she was going back to work the next day. The therapy groups hadn't helped whatsoever, though she pretended they did. Lexie was a nervous wreck.

* * *

><p>Alice was miserable. Her parents had screamed at her nearly every day since she had returned home. She had lost a lot of weight since coming back, and her ribs poked out through her skin sharply. The injuries had been healing well, at least she thought they were. Her parents had forbidden her from going to the follow-up appointments because of the price. Alice often thought about calling or texting Lexie, but she couldn't bring herself to do it. She knew Mark would be looking after the woman.<p>

* * *

><p>Lexie got up out of bed the next day, after another sleepless night. She got a shower, through her hair up, and pulled on jeans and a t-shirt, not really caring about what she looked like. She ate breakfast with the other doctors. Everyone was home and going to work, except for Dr. Shepard of course. He wouldn't be back for another week or so.<p>

Lexie drove to work nervously. She could have sworn that she saw Mr. Clark in a car next to her, that is until she blinked and realized that it was a woman.

Lexie pulled into the hospital parking lot and took the keys out of the admission. She took a couple of deep breaths before getting out of the car, clutching her bag tight against her. She walked quickly through the lot and came to the hospital doors. Her feet were suddenly glued to the sidewalk, and the only thing she could do was stare at the doors. Suddenly, a hand on her shoulder made her jump.

"You going in?" Mark asked as he stepped up beside Lexie. Her face seemed pale and sunken in, like she hadn't slept well.

Lexie nodded, stood up a little straighter, and then walked through the automatic doors. The antiseptic smell hit her like a wall and she felt her stomach tighten with anxiety. But Mark's cologne filled her nose when he walked in front of her, and she felt herself relax a bit.

Lexie changed into her scrubs in the locker room along with the other returning doctors. There was an air of sadness around the room, as they were all reminded of the doctors that used to change in there with them. The doctors who were no longer with them. The doctors that they had watched die.

Everyone began rounds with a somber look on their face. Lexie plastered on a fake smile and began greeting patience. She had finally begun to feel better, distracted, until she came to a certain hallway. The hallway where she had found Alice.

Lexie couldn't bring herself to walk across the line on the floor that separated the ICU wing from the hallway. She stood there, looking at the now spotless tile floor that was once coated in the teenage girl's blood. Now, not even a faint stain remained. Lexie jumped as Mark once again came up behind her and put a hand on her shoulder.

"How is she?" Dr. Sloan asked, gently leading Lexie through the hallway, remembering when he himself had seen Alice for the first time; barely breathing and coated in blood.

Lexie turned to frown at Mark. "I thought she was talking to you at least." She said, a whole new wave of worry washing over her. What if something had happened to her? Something bad.

"I figured she was talking to you." Mark replied. His eyebrows came together in a frown and he bit the inside of his cheek. Not only was he worried about Alice, but it wasn't good for Lexie to be obsessing over something else.

* * *

><p>The rest of the day crawled by for Lexie, as she was kept out of OR's and was forced to deal with insensitive patients. At last, she came to the locker room and changed back into the jeans and t-shirt she had worn earlier that day. Her mind was made up; she was going over to Alice's house.<p>

Lexie hurried out of the hospital, relieved to be out of the building, and got into her car. She saw Mark heading her way from his car, so she quickly started the car and drove off.

Mark watched as Lexie drove away from him and frowned as she pulled out of the parking lot and went right instead of left. To get to Meredith's house, she always took a left. And "coincidently" you had to take a right to go to Alice's house.

The car came to a stop and Lexie got out. She took a few seconds to ready herself, then got out of the vehicle and walked up the sidewalk to Alice's front porch. She rung the door bell, found it broken, and then knocked. After a few seconds, the door opened and Alice stood there.

Lexie's smile faded as she took a look at the girl. Alice had lost a lot of weight, and her already frail frame looked ready to break. She was dressed in a tank top and shorts, her skin visibly paler than when Lexie had seen her last. Her hair was held back in a bun, and she smelled vaguely of cigarette smoke and perfume.

"Lexie?" Alice asked. Lexie snapped out of her daze.

"Alice, hi. I was worried about you and you didn't call, so I stopped by." Lexie said, unable to keep her mind off of how…unhealthy the teenager looked.

"Yeah, sorry about that. Come in, if you want." Alice said, stepping back from the door. Lexie smiled a bit and walked in.

_**Hey guys, sorry I haven't updated lately. I've been really busy, but I hope you like this. Please review.**_


	13. Chapter 13

Lexie followed Alice into her house. She couldn't take her mind off of how much weight the girl seemed to have lost. She also seemed to be limping a bit, further worrying the older girl. Alice had already been quite a skinny girl, and it seemed impossible that she had grown any thinner.

Alice led Lexie into her kitchen and sat down at the table. The doctor sat down next to her and smiled.

"So how've you been?" Lexie asked, trying to read the emotions on Alice's face. Something was different about the girl, though she couldn't place her finger on it.

"Fine, I guess. I'm pretty sure everything healed okay." Alice replied quietly. Her face was sunken in, pale even. She played with her hands and kept her gaze lowered.

"Mind if I take a look at your side?" Lexie asked, just wanting to be sure everything _had _healed right.

Alice nodded somewhat reluctantly and stood up. She rolled up her shirt to show Lexie the still fresh scar on her side. Lexie stood as well to take a closer look. She was forced to suppress a gasp as her eyes fell upon a fresh, fist sized bruise on her rib cage, just above the scar.

"Looks good." Lexie forced herself to say. Alice nodded, knowing that she had seen the bruise, and sat back down along with Lexie.

"Have you been sleeping alright?" Alice didn't bother in being subtle. The matter had been bothering her since she had left.

"Uh, fine. I've been sleeping fine. How've you been, emotionally and all?" Lexie quickly changed the subject. How had Alice known she hadn't been sleeping?

"Just dandy." There was a tone of bitterness in Alice's voice. Both of the girls knew that they were lying to each other.

"Are you-What the hell are you doing?" Lexie's voice rose as she watched Alice pull a pack of Marlboros out of her pocket and light one.

Alice raised an eyebrow. "Jeez, relax. It's just a cigarette."

"No, I won't relax! You're 15, you shouldn't be smoking!" Dr. Grey tried to snatch away the cigarette, but Alice pulled it out of her grasp.

"Lexie, calm down. It's not that big of a deal. I've been smoking for a while. But I think you need to go." Alice told the young woman. She took a long drag from the cigarette and blew it out her nose.

"Alice, please. I saw the bruise." Lexie said desperately. If she had to leave now, who knew when she'd be able to see her again?

"I fell off my bike." Alice replied quickly. A surge of panic flashed in her eyes.

"Alice, do you even have a bike? You look need help, considering the fact that you look like crap." Lexie told the girl. She didn't believe the bike story for one second, considering Alice had hidden the reason her ribs were broken for a while.

"Get out of my house. And don't come back Lexie." Alice said quietly. Lexie's eyes widened with hurt and she struggled to think of something to say.

"But-" Alice cut her off before she could try to apologize. "Get the hell out! Don't you get that I don't need you anymore?" The younger of the two shouted, slamming her fist down on the table.

Lexie didn't say anything else. She got up, fighting back tears, and walked out of the house. Alice watched her go, taking another drag on her Marlboro.

Lexie got into her car and finally let the tears fall. She sobbed, resting her head against the steering wheel, for who knows how long. Finally, she pulled herself together and started the vehicle.

* * *

><p>Lexie managed to make it back to her house without breaking down again. She finally was able to get to the privacy of her bedroom, where she immediately allowed herself to sob again. <em>Don't you get that I don't need you anymore? <em>The girl's words rang in her head, matched with the picture of her pale, unhealthy form.

Eventually, the tears ran out and Lexie sat up in bed. She wiped at her red, splotchy face and struggled to control her breathing again. Her eyes literally _hurt _from lack of sleep, but she knew she wouldn't so much as drift off tonight.

* * *

><p>The next morning Lexie drug herself to the hospital. She numbly changed into her scrubs, not answering as her sister questioned whether or not she was okay. She went into the pit and started on her first patient. She was snapped out of her daze when the woman said she didn't know the medication she was on. Yet another human being who didn't care about her life.<p>

Before she could even register what was happening, Lexie found herself screaming. "Do you want to die?" She shrieked at the woman, though she was thinking of Alice the whole time.

* * *

><p>Mark came to the source of the shouting and saw to his dismay that it was in fact Lexie who was causing the ruckus. "Someone get psych in here!" He yelled, watching the young woman knock over a tray, shouting about someone wanting to die.<p>

* * *

><p>Alice walked along the hospital hallway, hoping to catch sight of Lexie. What she had said yesterday had been eating her up inside, and she knew she wouldn't feel right again until she apologized. She knew that she had really hurt Lexie by saying that. Her attention was caught as she heard yelling. Curious, Alice hurried towards the source of the noise.<p>

Lexie froze when she saw the small figure standing in the doorway. Was she really so sleep-deprived that she was hallucinating? Either way, there stood Alice, a concerned expression on her face.

"Lexie? I came to apologize about yesterday-" Alice quit talking as Lexie lunged at her.

"Why do you want to die?" Lexie screamed in the 15 year old's face. She would have went on, but suddenly found herself being forced onto a rolling hospital bed by other doctors.

Alice couldn't bring herself to break her eyes away from Lexie's struggling form. Doctors used Velcro straps to restrain her, and eventually her body fell still as she was injected with a sedative. Just as Mark turned to look from her to Alice, the younger girl whirled around and bolted out of the hospital.

_**Hey guys. I now know I need need NEED to finish this story after watching the finale. HOW COULD LEXIE BE DEAD? I literally bawled like a baby when she died. Now, Slexie will never happen. Anyways, I kind of have a co-writer now. Big thanks to drsnvamps! Please review!**_


	14. Chapter 14

Three months, two weeks, six days. That was how long it had been since Lexie had had that psychotic episode, induced by severe sleep depravity. After her brief admission to Psych where she was able to get some much needed sleep, things started to improve. There was no hiding her sleeping issues now, and because she had help thrust upon her, she was finally in a better place. She took a sleeping pill to calm her nerves so her mind wouldn't race as she tried to sleep, and made a habit of trying to maintain as best of a routine as she could with shift work. Though she was physically doing better, the constant worry for Alice's safety continued to linger.

* * *

><p>Strong arms gripped Alice, and she whimpered as pain shot through her body. A boot nudged her yet again re-broken ribs and the voice of her father filled the room. "<p>

"Shut the hell up." He growled and tossed her in the car. She heard her mother fumble for the keys and the ignition flared to a start. The jostling of the speeding car sent impossible pain through her bruised, bloody and broken body and it became all too much. The hum of the engine filled her ears and the world faded to black.

* * *

><p>Alice woke with a start as her father yelled at her. "Get the hell out of my car. I'm fucking done with your bullshit. " He slurred. Alice's father stepped out of the idling car and pretended to help her out like a concerned father. As soon as she was near the Emergency Entrance he let go of her and stormed back to the waiting car. Her mother stepped on the gas and the car squeeled out of the parking lot.<p>

Alice stumbled into the hospital, the scent of disinfectant hitting her like a wall. She made it over to the Nurses' Station where several of them leapt up to help her. They rushed over and tried to support her but she moved out of their grasp.

"Don't touch me. I want…I want Dr. Robbins." She demanded, and to her surprise they agreed. A few minutes later, a familiar blonde figure strolled down the hall. She stopped in front of the Nurses' Station, but Alice couldn't make out the conversation from where she stood waiting. The room was starting to spin and she wasn't sure how much longer she would be able to stay on her feet.

Alice watched as Arizona turned to follow the gestures of the nurse. Her normally pleasant features turned into a mask of shock as she rushed over towards her. Alice took a step back and nearly fell.

"Oh my God, Alice? What happened to you?" She reached out to Alice's shoulder and the girl gasped in pain. "Great, that's probably broken too." She mumbled. "I need a wheel chair," Arizona yelled to one of the nurses. "Alice, I'm going to take you up to pediatrics, and Callie's going to come in and help you, alright?" She said softly. Alice nodded, gripping the doctor's arm so that she wouldn't collapse.

A nurse immediately brought over a wheelchair and Arizona helped Alice to slowly sit in it. The girl cried out in pain at the tiniest movement, and it was obvious she was close to passing out.

Arizona quickly wheeled the chair into the elevator and pressed the fourth floor button. Her foot tapped impatiently and the ride seemed to take longer usual. The blonde doctor's mind was racing. What the hell had happened to the poor girl?

* * *

><p>Alice was afraid to <em>breathe <em>because of all of the pain. Every inhale, every exhale sent her entire chest into a whole new wave of pain. She could feel blood running down her face and had to guess that her forehead had been busted open. There was a loud ringing in her ears, and she was barely able to make out the dinging of the elevator. In fact, she could barely see because of the swelling.

Arizona quickly wheeled Alice to the first available room she could find. Nurses gave her startled glances when they saw the beaten, bloody girl in the wheelchair, when she obviously should have been on a gurney. Arizona ignored them and shut the door behind her. As gently as she could, Arizona wrapped an arm around Alice and helped her up onto the examination table. The poor girl screamed in pain at the movement.

A pattern of red covered Alice's shirt and Arizona realized with a gasp that it wasn't an abstract shirt, but blood seeping through the fabric. She frantically started yanking gauze packages out of the drawers. She placed them on the table and moved towards the now barely conscious girl. Even in her weakened state, she had wrapped her arm gingerly around herself and curled into a ball as best as she could with the broken ribs and dislocated shoulder. Her already bleeding arms were now smudged red from her elbows to her wrists. A gasp came from the doorway. Callie stepped into the room and immediately moved for the girl. Alice struggled to sit up and wiggle away.

"Oh no you don't." Callie muttered, and then made a bee-line for the examination table. Her hip grazed a metal tray and it went flying off of the counter, hitting the floor with a crash. The noise startled Alice and she tried to dart out of the room. Callie caught her in a gentle grasp and Alice thrashed violently.

"LET ME GO!" She sobbed as she repeated the phrase over and over. A combination of blood loss, pain, and fatigue slowly wore at her and she stopped moving. "Page Lexie." Callie instructed the blonde doctor. She nodded swiftly and reached for the small device attached to her hip.

* * *

><p>Lexie heard her pager go off beside her and she sat up in the pitch-black on-call room. She swiped it frantically off of the table and hurried to the room number that she had been paged. Not fully alert and still drunk with sleep, she didn't think twice about the fact that she was in Pediatrics until a concerned Arizona met her outside the door.<p>

"What is it? Who's the patient and what's their history." She asked, running through the usual questions. Arizona's sad eyes met hers, and she sighed quietly.

"15 year old girl. Previously treated for a GSW to the abdomen, and for broken ribs. Currently in here with multiple lacerations to her entire body, as well as bruises, broken bones and a dislocated shoulder. Lexie, it's Alice." Lexie immediately brushed past Arizona and steeled herself for the sight before her.

Callie had Alice pinned down onto the exam table. The dark haired doctor glanced over her shoulder and then back at the petite girl. "Alice, Lexie is here for you." She murmured quietly and she slowly stepped away.

Lexie perched on the table and looked Alice in the eyes. "Sweetie, I know it hurts and I know you're scared but I need you to let us fix you, you're pretty banged up." She said in a gentle tone. For the first time since she got to the hospital, Alice was compliant. She nodded weakly.

"Good girl," She murmured. "Will you let Callie and Arizona fix you up so that I can sit with you?" She asked. Alice said nothing, her blank eyes staring past to the ceiling, but she nodded almost imperceptibly. Lexie sat dutifully by her head and the two other doctors we able to get to work.

Callie started an examination while Arizona went to get more supplies and coffee. Dr. Torres worked efficiently, cutting Alice's shirt off to reveal a lacing of gashes that criss-crossed over her stomach. She pressed her lips together to suppress a gasp and gently tugged off the blood stained shorts. The girl yelped in pain as Callie re-set her ribs and shoulder.

"There, shouldn't be as bad now." She offered. Arizona stepped into the room and clicked the door shut. Armed with medical supplies, Arizona and Callie started cleaning and stitching the wounds. Even with the two people working on her, it took close to two hours to fully treat the extent of her injuries.

_**Hey guys, I've kind of been on a writing spree today. Drsnvamps and I are now officially co-writers. Yay! She came up with a lot of the stuff for this chapter, so be sure to credit her in the reviews! **_


	15. Chapter 15

**_Hey guys, the song that inspired this chapter is called Shelter by Birdy. Give it a listen :)._**

Lexie hadn't been able to take her eyes off of the gashes on Alice's stomach the whole time the girl was being treated. Out of everything else that had needed treated on the girl, the lacerations took the most time. And they weren't just on her stomach; they were everywhere. Three on her left arm, two on her right arm, a rather large one across her thigh, one across her right shoulder, and nine on her abdomen.

Callie and Arizona had given Alice a small dose of morphine to help her sleep through the pain and the girl passed out within a minute. She now rested on the hospital bed, breathing softly with her heart monitor beeping steadily next to her.

* * *

><p><em>His whiskey scented breath filled her face as he loomed over her, his face red with rage. Alice cringed back, only to find the wall blocking her from getting out of the way. Her body was already covered with forming bruises, and she could feel blood running from her nose and lip. Of all of the times that he got drunk and lost his temper, she had never feared him like she did now. This man resembled nothing of her father. No matter how angry he was, it was never weapons; just fists. This was the first time he had pulled a knife on her, and the first time that she feared for her life.<em>

_His screams of rage, barely comprehendible from the slurring, filled her ears. Her mother sat on the couch, sipping vodka from the bottle and watching with a bemused expression. "Fuck off." She snarled at him. He slashed the knife across her stomach, once, twice, again and again until she could no longer take it. _

_"Please Daddy, no more." She sobbed, any trace of defiance gone from her voice. The man pulled the knife away as if he were going to stop. She sighed in relief, only to watch in horror as he moved it to her legs. He wasn't stopping; he had simply run out of places to cut. Agony ripped through her as he slashed the soft skin. With each drop of blood that stained the hardwood, Alice could feel any memories of being safe, loving her father, having a halfway decent life. She could feel the darkness pressing on her more now, and gave up fighting against it. Let death come, anything was better than this, she decided. _

_"Oh shit Jerry, you went too far. If we don't get her to the hospital, we're going to have to deal with her goddamn body. We'll just drop her off and get out of here." Her mother's voice was fuzzy and far away. Hands gripped her and she whimpered as the pressure made the cuts burn. "Shut up you useless bitch." He snapped at her as he nudged her re-broken ribs._

* * *

><p>"What the hell happened?" Lexie asked as soon as Alice's eyes had fluttered shut. Callie turned to Arizona, considering she had seen the girl first.<p>

"I guess she just stumbled in through the emergency entrance and asked the nurses for me. She was barely able to stand, but I didn't see the cuts until I got her up here. And then I think she got scared when she realized what was happening, because she basically tried to break out of the room." Callie took the story from there.

"That's when I came in and she was pretty much trying to escape. I caught her and just kind of help her until she calmed down. You were the only person I could think to page, but I still had to hold her down until you got here." Callie finished.

"So you didn't see who dropped her off?" Lexie asked. Both doctors shook their heads. It was then Lexie remembered the new security cameras that had been set up after the shooting. The emergency entrance would have been recorded.

"I'll be right back." Lexie told the women as she whirled around and jogged towards the elevator. She knew she would have to be back in time in case Alice woke up. God knows how the girl was going to react when the drugs wore off. She wasn't the same kid she was a couple of months ago.

Lexie pressed the first floor button and soon enough arrived in the lobby. She walked past the Nurses' Station to a room labeled SECURITY and opened the door. To her satisfaction, a whole wall of screens glowed in the otherwise dark room, showing various locations in and around the hospital. Two guards sat at a desk in front of the screens, and had turned to look at Lexie.

"I need to see the Emergency Entrance tapes from uh, about two hours and 15 minutes ago." She said, glancing down at her watch. The guards shrugged and nodded, then turning around to the control panel. Lexie shut the door and walked up behind them.

The tapes had been rewound and Lexie watched as one of the guards pressed play. Nothing happened for several minutes. "Fast forward it a bit." She told him, leaning on the back of one of their chairs. The guard obliged, sensing the urgency in her voice, and sped the tape up. A car zoomed up to the curb and he pressed play.

Lexie watched in sheer horror as she saw a dark form drag Alice from the backseat of the car and then walk her up to the doors. She was even more disgusted as the man nearly let her fall as he ran back to the car. The vehicle sped away and Lexie watched Alice stumbled into the hospital. Those sick bastards had abandoned her.

_**Please leave some reviews, and once again, don't forget to thank drsnvamps!**_


	16. Chapter 16

"Thank you." Lexie said to the guards before rushing out of the security room. She ran for the elevator and was glad it was the middle of the night and there wasn't much traffic in the hospital. Dr. Grey arrived on the Pediatric floor and rushed out of elevator as soon as the doors dinged.

"Lexie, where were you?" Callie demanded as the young woman entered the room again. Lexie took a few seconds to catch her breath before answering.

"I went down to look at the security footage. Her parents abandoned her." Lexie said quietly. She watched as looks of concern and pity came over the two doctor's faces.

"What do you mean?" Arizona asked, wanting to know the whole story. She was about two seconds away from calling the CPS.

"I mean her father drug her out of the car, dropped her by the doors, and drove away." Lexie said tiredly. She knew how badly Alice had been afraid of getting put in a foster home.

"What do we do with her?" Callie asked, glancing at the girl on the bed, who turned in her sleep.

"She can stay with me. At least until we get everything figured out." Lexie quickly volunteered. She looked at Alice as well and knew it wouldn't be like the first time the girl had stayed with her.

"Are you sure? She seems kind of…unstable." Arizona asked. Lexie didn't have any teenage siblings, or daughters for that matter.

"She's stayed with me before, and it's better than one of those foster homes." Lexie nearly pleaded for Alice's sake.

"She's going to wake up any minute. We only gave her a little bit of morphine and the moment that wears off, she's going to be up." Callie replied, continuing to watch Alice. The 15 year moved again and a tiny whimper forced itself out of her lips.

* * *

><p>The three doctors waited in silence for Alice to wake up. Callie had been right; Alice woke up 10 minutes later. Her eyelids cracked open slowly and she squinted against the fluorescents. Fear suddenly struck her when she didn't remember where she was. Shooting up in the bed, she was reminded of what had happened when an impossible amount of pain hit her like a ton of bricks.<p>

"Woah, easy honey. You're alright." Lexie immediately rushed to the girl's beside and tried to get her to lean back again. Alice refused, afraid of the pain that would come with movement.

"What's going on?" Alice asked quietly. Her eyes flickered to each of their faces and she absolutely _hated _the pity she saw on all of them.

"We know your parents left you Alice. You're going to be staying with Lexie until we can get everything sorted out." Arizona told her carefully, waiting for a reaction. Alice didn't reply, but stole a glance off of Lexie.

"Do you want more morphine?" Callie asked, noting that Alice was remaining as still as she could, no doubt trying to cause herself the least amount of pain possible. Alice nodded hesitantly and Callie went out of the room to fetch the medication. She returned shortly and injected it into the IV. The raven haired doctor waited a minute before she helped Alice to lie back on the bed again. The girl's eyes drooped and then shut.

"Well, you'll need some help. Arizona and I will take her back to the house while you get her stuff if you want." Callie continued with the conversation they had been having before Alice woke up. She had found herself wanting to help the girl in any way she could.

"Really? That'd be great." Lexie said, surprised. She and Callie had never really talked much before.

For sure." Callie replied and turned to Arizona who nodded in approval.

"I'm going to go call CPS and get this sorted out." The blonde doctor excused herself and stepped into the hallway. Callie and Lexie sat quietly, both thinking the same thing. Callie was the one to voice it. "You know she's not the same Alice that you knew a few months ago. She lived in hell and she's come out of it. She's a changed person, Lex." Callie warned her. Lexie simply nodded.

"I know," she half whispered as she reached out and brushed a stray lock of auburn hair from Alice's face. "But I can't just leave her alone. It's going to take some time but I'm sure she'll come back from this. She's a fighter, Callie." The opinionated doctor simply nodded and bit her lip to keep from voicing her thoughts. Callie didn't know the girl as well as Lexie did. Perhaps she could find herself again.

* * *

><p>A mere hour later the CPS deemed Alice's parents to be unsuitable and released Alice into Lexie's custody. One of the social workers hung back and accompanied Callie, Lexie, Alice and Arizona to the home that Lexie shared with a few other residents.<p>

* * *

><p>Callie and Arizona kept their offer to stay with Alice while Lexie went to the house to gather Alice's belongings. Even though it was 2am on a Sunday, the house was humming with activity. Three residents chattered as they ate cereal at the table, and there was a shower running upstairs.<p>

Arizona slipped her arm around Alice's waist as she helped the girl into the house. Alice, though groggy from the morphine, whipped her head to the side to glare at her. "Don't touch me!" She grumbled.

The three residents in the kitchen froze in mid-position, with spoons hanging in the air as they took in Alice's broken appearance. They collected themselves quickly and busied themselves with cereal and conversation about surgeries they hoped to do. Alice rolled her eyes and yanked out of Arizona's grasp, hobbling up the stairs. Profanity rang out though the house as every movement made her cuts sting agonizingly.

Callie clicked the door shut and wandered into the kitchen before fixing herself a bowl of cereal. April was the first of the residents to speak. "Wh… What happened to her?" She sounded outraged.

"Her father attacked her. Almost killed her. Broke her ribs again, cut up her stomach, legs _and_ arms. Dislocated a shoulder." She said in a low hiss.

"Fucking asshole." Alex deadpanned.

"That's not the worst of it either," Arizona piped up. "He realized he almost killed her, so he dumped her at the hospital and they skipped town. No way of contacting them. CPS has placed her in Lexie's custody; she's at the house gathering Alice's things."

"Poor kid." Jackson commented, and he stood to clear his dishes. The two others did the same.

"We've got to get back to the hospital, and she's probably better off if the house is quiet right now anyways." Alex tossed his bowl in the sink and headed for the door. April and Jackson followed suit. Exhausted, Callie and Arizona took advantage of the quiet and collapsed on the couch together.

* * *

><p>Eventually, Lexie returned lugging several suitcases. It was around three in the morning and she yawned as she put them down by the doorway.<p>

"Get everything?" Callie asked somewhat sarcastically as she eyed the bulging suitcases. She and Arizona both sat up on the couch.

"I think so. Where is she?" Lexie asked as she took her coat and shoes off. Before either of the other doctors could answer, Alice came limping down the steps.

"Upstairs." Callie replied, glancing at the stairs. Lexie nodded.

The youngest of the three settled on the loveseat across from Arizona and Callie. They took advantage of the always stocked wine fridge in the kitchen. A now half empty bottle of Merlot sat on the counter.

"I am _so tired_." Was all that Lexie said as she sipped at the wine. The two on the couch nodded in agreement. They were quietly discussing Alice but their chatter was brought to an abrupt halt when they heard her coming down the stairs.

Alice made her way into the living room and sat down on the couch beside Lexie. Callie and Arizona exchanged surprised glances as Alice curled up beside the older woman, resting her head on her shoulder. Lexie's shocked gaze flickered to the couple on the couch, but she said nothing. She traced abstract patterns on Alice's back and Alice quickly relaxed. She still had yet to say anything but seemed perfectly content with sitting quietly.

* * *

><p>The trio went back to talking, but kept their conversations trivial. 20 minutes passed, and the doctors noticed that Alice was shifting uncomfortably, lips pressed in a thin line. Recognizing it as a sign of pain, Arizona was the first to speak up. "Alice, sweetie, if it hurts just say so. You're not supposed to tough all of this pain out for the sake of hiding it from us. We're doctors, it's our job to make people feel better."<p>

"I'm fine." Alice insisted.

"No, you're not." Callie said adamantly, holding Alice's gaze.

"I said I'm fine. Let. It. Go." Her tone changed from quiet and submissive to ice cold and blades of steel. Callie huffed but said no more. Alice rose from the couch and groaned quietly as the movement caused the pain to flare up. "'S'cuse me." She mumbled and walked out of the living room.

* * *

><p>"I'm worried, she should be taking something for her pain. The morphine is wearing off. A patient in the hospital would be receiving more meds by now, she shouldn't be any different." Callie pointed out.<p>

"I know, you're right. But she's refusing, and the last thing she needs is people forcing her to do something she doesn't want to." Lexie argued. That shut Callie up; she knew that Lexie was right.

* * *

><p>Meanwhile, Alice had taken advantage of their bickering and slipped into the kitchen. She snagged a wine glass from the honey oak cupboards and poured herself a healthy sized glass. She leaned against the counter and took several large swallows. The ache of her muscles, the burn of her cuts, and the agony of her thoughts were all numbed. She had a glass and a half down before Lexie came wandering in for a fill up. She stared at Alice in shock.<p>

Alice glared back, not a hint of remorse in her eyes. Callie and Arizona came to see what was taking Lexie so long and stopped dead beside her. "What the hell, Alice?" Lexie finally found her voice.

"I lied. It hurts Lexie, it fucking _kills_. My ribs, my shoulder, my cuts, my thoughts. Wine made it better. It was either alcohol," she tipped her head towards the bottle "or drugs." She nodded to Arizona's medical bag. "Pick your poison." She snapped at her. She tipped the glass skyward before they could stop her and effectively finished her second huge glass. The 15 year old slammed it down on the counter and stumbled drunkenly up the winding staircase.

_**So, drsnvamps and I have spent like the last three hours working on this super long super AWESOME chapter. So you better review! :D**_


	17. Chapter 17

_**Hey guys. Sorry I had to repost this because I sort of forgot to add the beginning. Oops. We picked a couple of songs that were kind of inspirational to this chapter, so feel free to listen to them while you read! :D**_

_**Without a Word- Birdy**_

_**Between- Courier**_

_**Echo- Jason Walker**_

_**The Lonely- Christina**_

The three adults stood in the kitchen dumbstruck with shock. "Did that actually just happen?" Arizona shook her head in disbelief. Callie bounced back the quickest.

"Okay, I'm not sure about you two but I'm not letting her get away with that." Callie stepped out of the kitchen and followed Alice's path up the stairs. Neither Lexie or Arizona made a move to stop her. Callie stopped outside of the room that Alice was in. The door was closed. She knocked on it gently.

"Go away." A muffled voice came from the room. Callie ignored the request and stepped in anyways. Alice was stretched out on the bed with a pillow over her face.

"You can't seem to listen, can you?" She yanked the pillow away from her face and sat up quickly, clearly not thinking about her actions. "OWWW, oww, fucking owwww!" She yelped, gasping in pain.

Callie walked swiftly over to the bed and sat down beside the girl, reaching her arm out to support her. Her actions were not well received.

"I don't need your help." She slurred. To Alice's surprise, Callie pulled her arm away and shifted so she was facing her.

"I know it's miserable, Alice. I get it. You're in pain, mentally and physically. It sucks, and it's not something that I would wish on anyone. But you're strong, Alice. Damn strong. And we're not going to watch you throw everything away like this." Callie held her eye contact. Alice glanced away.

"Then don't watch. It's my life, and I'll do with it what I want. Don't you have a broken arm to re-set or something?" Callie rolled her eyes and didn't move. "Get out." Alice demanded quietly. Callie stayed put. "I barely know you, Callie. You have no right to be in here lecturing me about what I can and can't do. SO GET THE FUCK OUT, AND TELL THE OTHER TWO NOT TO BOTHER WHILE YOU'RE AT IT!" She whipped the pillow at Callie, but missed by a mile. Callie stood up and left the room without a word.

Lexie and Arizona cringed as they heard Alice's profanity filled shouting from upstairs. Soon after, Callie came walking down the stairs.

"What happened?" Lexie asked immediately.

"She wasn't exactly...thrilled that I was in her room. And she's apparently decided that she's going to do whatever she wants. I told you Lexie, hell and back." The dark haired doctor said. She bit her cheek irritably.

"Do you think she was serious about the drugs?" Lexie questioned worriedly.

"Wouldn't surprise me. I'd keep an extremely close eye on her if I were you. I've seen kids go through this before, mostly after abuse. They turn to self-medication, drinking, violence." Arizona said, thinking of the several kids she'd had committed to Psych in the past.

"Are you going to be okay staying here with her for the rest of the night? Because Arizona and I have to get back to the hospital in like, an hour." Callie said before Lexie could reply to the blonde doctor.

"Yeah. We'll be fine. She's probably just going to sleep it off anyway." Lexie replied quickly. Arizona and Callie both gave her questioning looks.

"Alright. Well call us if anything happens." Arizona said finally. She and Callie walked to the door and let themselves out.

Lexie collapsed onto the couch and sighed shakily, close to tears. It had only been minutes before that the teenager had been leaning on her affectionately, acting like the Alice Lexie had come to know in the week following the shooting. And then her vicious, defensive attitude has returned just as suddenly as it had left.

* * *

><p>After Lexie had sat, drank the rest of her wine, and prepared herself, she started up the stairs. The house was incredibly silent, setting Lexie on edge. She reached the second floor and walked down the hallway to Alice's closed door. She raised her fist to knock, then decided against it. The doctor pressed her ear against the door and listened. Silence. Lexie took a deep breath and opened the door slowly.<p>

The lights were out in Alice's room, and Lexie squinted in the dark. Alice's still figure was sprawled out on the bed and Lexie listened to her steady breathing. The dark light made her nearly unrecognizable, thanks to the dark bruises marring her face. Since she had changed into a tank top and shorts, the bandaged cuts on her limbs were visible. Lexie didn't realize that she was tearing up until she blinked and salty water streamed down her face. Suddenly, Lexie jumped as Alice turned in her sleep. The young doctor quickly backed out of the room and shut the door quietly.

* * *

><p>Lexie ended up dozing off in the room across from Alice's. Her light sleep was broken around 7:00 when the sound of Alice retching filled the house. Lexie quickly blinked the sleep out of her eyes and jumped out of the bed, jogging towards the bathroom. She stopped at the doorway to see Alice hunched over the toilet, her body wracked with fading dry heaves. Lexie bent down next to her and held the girl's hair back as another wave of nausea hit her and she threw up once again into the toilet.<p>

Lexie grabbed a paper cup off of the sink counter and filled it up with cool water. She handed it to Alice, who had leaned back from the toilet and was catching her breath. Almost reluctant for a small amount of help, Alice took the cup after a few seconds and rinsed her mouth out.

Eventually the nausea passed and Alice was left with a wicked headache. She groaned and shoved away from the toilet, brushing past Lexie without a word. "I need drugs." She complained to Lexie. The surgeon raised an eyebrow. Alice rolled her eyes.

"Oh, I'm supposed to deal with all of this," she gestured to the length of her battered body "without anything for the pain?" Lexie shook her head, and reluctantly fetched the meds that Arizona had left for her. The last thing she wanted was for Alice to get hooked on painkillers, but it wasn't fair to make her go without either.

Lexie returned to Alice's room a few moments later with a couple of pills in hand. Alice threw her head back and swallowed them dry. Lexie shook her head with concern but decided not to say anything. "So… breakfast?" She suggested. Alice dragged her eyes to her.

"Don't you have to get back to the hospital?" Her voice was so void of emotion it made Lexie flinch. She nodded reluctantly. "Well don't let me keep you then." Alice motioned for the door, her lips in a sarcastic curl. She sensed Lexie's hesitance. "I'm cut up and bruised, not on my death bed. Just go." She started down the stairs and Lexie followed.

"If you're sure you'll be ok…" Lexie searched her face for any hint of emotion, but the girl's features were set in an emotionless mask as she lied down on the couch. "Someone will be coming in about," she glanced at her watch "thirty minutes. There's a list of cell and pager numbers on the fridge. Arizona's and Callie's are on there too. Don't hesitate to call if you need anything." She stressed. The injured girl nodded. "Okay, I'm off then. I'll see you when my shift is over." Lexie grabbed her keys and dragged herself out the door, wanting nothing more than to stay with the unstable teenager.

* * *

><p>The lock on the door clicked, and Alice sat up with a jolt, ignoring the pain that shot through her body. A broad, obviously male figure stepped through the door. "Lex?" He called out, his voice ringing through the hallway. Alice got off of the couch she had been resting on and wandered cautiously towards the hallway. "Mark." Her voice was shaky.<p>

Mark's eyebrows shot up in surprise when he heard her voice and shock crossed his features. "Alice? What the hell happened to you?" His voice was filled with concern. Uncertainty flickered across the 15 year old's face.

It's just Mark. Lexie's friend, your friend. You're safe with him, she tried to convince herself. He stepped towards her, completely unaware of the fear that had overcome Alice, and reached out to her arm. His fingers brushed her arm as he tried to get a better look at the gashes. A flood of memories rushed over her. Mark was no longer himself; it was her father standing in front of her. The hand became a knife, slashing her over and over. She choked out a sob.

"Please, don't touch me." She begged. Mark pulled his hand away, totally confused. Alice spun around and booked it up the stairs, slamming the door of the bathroom. Her sobs rang out though the house.

Fear overwhelmed Alice, and she couldn't think. Her mind shut down, flashbacks of the previous night flitting though her head over and over again and she struggled to think of a plan. Anything to put distance between her and that awful man; anything to save her life. She locked the bathroom door and crouched in the shower stall, arms wrapped around herself protectively. Pain wracked her body, brought on by the sudden bursts of movement.

Alice could barely hear the words of the conversation he was having with someone on the phone over the pounding of her heart. Time passed agonizingly slowly. It seemed like hours later when she heard the door open downstairs.

"…Lexie's in surgery…" "… see what I can do." Alice could only hear snippets of the new voice. Footsteps up the stairway, louder as the person neared the door. They knocked softly. "Alice?" She saw the lock click and the door opened slowly. Alice sighed in relief when she saw it was Callie and Arizona. It was safe now; he couldn't hurt her. Just as she began the struggle to sit up, pain sliced through her stomach. She felt a hot gush of blood stream down her skin and soak through the shirt she was wearing. The metallic smell only brought on more memories last night and Alice felt her breathing speed up again. "Damnit, she ripped some stitches." The voice came from Callie. Alice tried to get up but it was like her body was disconnected from her mind. Callie stepped forward and picked her up effortlessly.

Arizona moved out of the way as Callie carried the now still girl out of the bathroom. Her eyes widened as she saw the dark red that had stained Alice's shirt and was spreading onto Callie's dark blue scrubs.

"Is she alright? Do you want me to carry her?" Mark asked, unaware of how much fear he struck into the teenager.

Alice literally _clung_ to Callie as she processed _his_ words. "Please, don't let him hurt me again." She barely whispered, uncaring about how weak she seemed. Mark looked down at her, alarmed, and then backed away.

"I think you should go Mark." Arizona said, watching as Alice tried to hide herself from the man. He nodded at her and quickly left the house.

"Alright Alice, we're going to get you stitched back up and then we'll stay with you until Lexie gets back." Callie told the 15 year old. Even more blood had seeped out, creating a large stain on Callie's scrubs.

Arizona and Callie worked quickly to reseal the lacerations on Alice's stomach. She calmed down into an almost trance like state, unwilling to make eye contact with either of the doctors or reply to their questions.

* * *

><p>The complex surgery ran right to the end of her shift. Lexie changed out of her scrubs and tiredly made her way home, wondering how Alice had managed the day. Soon enough, she parked her car outside of the house.<p>

Lexie unlocked the door and tossed her coat on a nearby chair. Callie stepped out of the kitchen. "Finally." She stepped forward.

"Callie? What are you doing here? Where's Alice?" Lexie was beyond confused. Callie jerked her head towards the couch, where the girl sat.

"Mark came looking for you. Guess he triggered some sort of flashback but she had a meltdown. Ripped several stitches, and now she won't say a word." Callie explained grimly.

"Damnit." Lexie swore under her breath. Two steps backward. "Thanks for staying with her. I'm sorry I couldn't get home sooner, I was in surgery all day." She explained. Callie nodded empathetically and gathered her stuff.

"Night, Lexie." She called out and shut the door behind her and Arizona, who hadn't said a word. "Bye." Lexie mumbled towards the door. She slipped off her shoes and headed over to the couch. Alice sat there totally apathetic.

"Alice, I'm so sorry I couldn't make it back sooner." No reply. "What happened today?" Still nothing. "Why were you so upset? You know Mark isn't going to hurt you." Alice cringed and flinched back as she said Mark's name. Lexie thought back to the security tapes. Mark was around the same height and build as her father, and they both had the same hair. He must have triggered memories of last night.

"He reminded you of your father, didn't he?" Lexie asked quietly. Alice's head snapped to the side and her eyes studied Lexie's. She opened her mouth to say something, didn't, and dropped her gaze. Lexie watched as the teenager got up slowly from the couch with a small squeak of pain and then hobbled up the stairs.

_**Hey guys, thanks for all the reviews. Drsnvamps and a I have been working on this for the past few hours, so we hope you like it!**_


	18. Chapter 18

_**Song list for this chapter:**_

_**How to Disappear Completely- Radiohead**_

My Immortal- Evanescence

The Scientist- Coldplay

_**Mad World- Gary Jules**_

_**Enjoy **_

The pounding bass of the music rattled the house where the party was being held. It was really starting to get on Alice's nerves. She downed the rest of the beer she was drinking and tossed away the can into her growing pile. This was her fourth. Her eyes scanned the crowd until she found the guy she had been chatting with earlier today. He was slightly hippie, always seemed half-baked, but was easy to get along with and didn't seem like the type to pass up sex, so he would do for now. She wandered over to him and dragged him with her to the kitchen. They took a couple shots each, and chatted drunkenly about bands. She glanced at the stove clock. 2:08 AM_. Shit, I've gotta get back and I have no idea where I am, _she cursed herself for not paying more attention to where she was.

Alice knew the host from school, but it was dark when she arrived and she hadn't driven so she wasn't paying attention to the directions. She gave hippie-boy her number and excused herself. Weaving through the crowd of bodies, she was finally able to find her coat from the chaos in the front hallway and burst through the front door. The fresh air was a huge relief. She pulled out her phone and contemplated her options. Alice sighed and dialed Arizona's number, figuring she'd be the one who would give her the least grief.

* * *

><p>"It's Alice." Arizona said as she read the caller ID on her mobile. Lexie and Callie both gave exhausted, relieved sighs and then fell quiet as the blonde doctor answered the phone.<p>

"Alice? Are you alright?" Arizona asked immediately as she answered the call.

"Put it on speaker." Callie hissed. The blonde glanced at her and then nodded. She pressed the speaker button and held the phone away from her face.

"Yeah, I'm fine. Listen, can you come get me?" Alice's voice slurred from the small device. Loud music and shouting was evident in the background. Callie rolled her eyes, pissed at the fact the 15 year was at a party.

"Where are you?" Arizona asked calmly, glancing at Lexie and Callie. She knew if she started lecturing the girl, she would just get hung up on.

"I….I don't know, hold on," Alice's voice grew fainter as she turned away from the phone "Hey! Hey you, where the hell are we? What?" There was a long pause. "Okay, say it…say it again. Alright, Arizona, I'm at… 336 Sunset Drive. Hey, are you going to bitch me out when I get in the car? Cause I'll just stay in the " Judging by her voice, it was obvious the girl was drunk, maybe even high.

Before Arizona could react, Callie grabbed the phone. "Alice, get your ass out of that party, now." She growled.

"Hey Callie." Alice laughed into the phone. The Hispanic doctor's jaw locked in anger and frustration and she handed the phone back to Arizona.

"Alright, I'm coming to get you." Arizona said tiredly.

"Wait…don't tell Lexie. She'll flip the fuck out." Alice said, sounding a bit amused. Arizona glanced at Lexie, who was staring at the phone, an eyebrow arched.

"Okay….I'll be there in like, 10 minutes." Arizona replied, hanging up the phone quickly.  
>Lexie and Callie watched as Arizona hurried out of the house, grabbing her keys off of the hook as she left.<p>

* * *

><p>Alice sat outside on the curb, head spinning. She took a drag on the cigarette she had lifted from somebody and held the smoke in for as long as she could make herself. Eventually she let it drift out through her nose and yawned. Her head turned to the side as she heard a car beep. Squinting, she saw Arizona's car turning onto the street. Alice quickly put the Newport out on the pavement beside her and stood up.<p>

Arizona watched as the 15 year old stumbled over to her car. She fumbled for the car handle and finally got the passenger side door open. As soon as Alice got into the car, Arizona smelled the booze and smoke on her.

"On a scale of 1 to 10, how messed up are you?" Arizona questioned, wondering if she should stop by the hospital to get an IV for the girl.

"Eight. Eight and a half." Alice laughed, leaning back in the seat. Eventually, the chuckles died down and Alice turned to look at Arizona.

"You didn't tell Lexie, did you?" Alice asked slowly. Her eyelids drooped and she yawned again.

"Well, she kind of heard you on the phone." Arizona admitted. Alice sighed loudly from the passenger seat.

"Why does she keep freaking out over everything I do? It's…it's not like she's my mom or something." Alice rambled drunkenly.

"Because she cares about you. She just wants the best for you Alice." Arizona told the girl. Alice rolled her eyes and scoffed.

"That was about the most…the most stupid thing I ever heard." The 15 year old told Arizona, who sighed and didn't reply.

A couple of minutes later, Arizona pulled up next to Lexie's house. She got out of the car, and waited for Alice to eventually stumble out of the vehicle as well. She had learned by now not to try to help Alice out psychically, but still remained close to the girl as she walked slowly towards the house.

* * *

><p>Lexie and Callie's heads both jerked towards the door as it opened. Arizona walked in first, with Alice shuffle in after. Both doctors stood up from their positions on the couch.<p>

"Do you know how close we were to calling the police? You've been gone for six hours." Callie immediately began.

"Honestly Callie, can this bitch fest wait until tomorrow? Cause your lectures really bring down my buzz." Alice whined. Callie opened her mouth to attempt to put the girl in her place, but was interrupted by Lexie.

"Alice, just go to bed." The youngest doctor said tiredly. Alice looked at her in surprise, expecting an especially long, irritating rant from her. But Lexie just tipped her head towards the staircase and Alice obliged, content with the fact that she had gotten off the hook.

"She was just in the hospital two weeks ago and you're not even going to flip out the tiniest bit when she comes home completely wasted?" Callie exclaimed in a hushed shout.

"If I freak out, she's just going to be more defiant. We just have to give her time to cope with what happened." Lexie replied calmly. She glanced up the stairs when she heard Alice's door shut.

Callie shook her head, but bit her tongue to keep from saying anything else. Time wasn't just going to magically heal the teenager. She needed help, like _professional _help. Nonetheless, she and Arizona said goodnight to Lexie and left the house.

* * *

><p>Two more weeks passed. Alice was completely healed physically, left with nothing but scars. However, her attitude hadn't gotten any better. She was rude, offensive, rarely ever did anything Lexie requested of her, and did whatever the hell she felt like most of the time. The other residents in the house held their patience with her, considering they had seen the terrible condition she had come to the house in. They kept their mouths shut when a bottle of booze would go missing from the cabinet beside the sink, or when they saw her sneak in after a long night out. Lexie had nearly given up on trying to force the girl to get better.<p>

* * *

><p>Exhausted from her 3pm-3am shift, Lexie sighed in relief as she pulled into the driveway. Grabbing her bag, Lexie got out of the car and jogged up to the door. She was fumbling for her keys in her purse when the lock on the door slid open. Lexie frowned. There were no lights on, so presumably no one was up. The door opened, and a shaggy haired guy who reeked of pot and beer slipped out of the door, tossing a "later dude" over his shoulder to Alice who was standing in the hallway. "Oh hey bro!" he said to Lexie as he brushed passed her, and then stumbled down the driveway and out of sight. From the glow of the porch light Lexie could make out Alice's face. She smirked.<p>

Lexie stepped in and shut the door. "Would you like to explain to me why the hell you just snuck some pothead out of my house?" She was beyond livid. Alice sighed.

"I know, he's not up to my usual standards, but he was an easy lay and had free beer so I'm not complaining." She shrugged and turned around to head to the kitchen. Lexie grabbed her shoulder.

"NO! You do not get to just walk away from me. I don't understand this; you used to be a complete sweetheart. Now you're defiant, constantly at a crossroads of either anger or apathy and being a bitch to _everyone_. We have all tried so damn hard to help you, and all that you do is push us away! It's not fair, Alice. We're doing this for you, but it's evident that you don't need us." Lexie finally snapped after weeks of holding her tongue for Alice's sake.

"It's hard for you? Do you have any idea what I've fucking been through! These scars," she yanked her shirt up to reveal a pattern of red lines on her flat stomach. "are always going to be there. A constant reminder of exactly what MY OWN FUCKING FATHER did to me. I can't go a day without seeing them. And not all of them are from him." Alice shouted

"No Alice, I don't know what you've been through! Because you won't tell me anything!" Lexie shouted back.

"Fine. You want to know what happened? I'll tell you." Alice lowered her voice. Tears welled in her eyes, and for the first time in weeks she made no attempts to hide them.

She sank down on the couch in the living room and Lexie followed. "It started out no different than any other night. A few strikes here and there, nothing out of the ordinary. But that night I took all of the beer from the fridge and tossed it out the window. For once, just once, I wanted to see a fridge that wasn't more stocked with alcohol than food. It didn't take him long to figure out what I had done. Because once he found out, he came to have a little fucking chat about it, while my mom sat by and watched. He hit me, punched me, kicked me. He yanked my arm so damn hard that he dislocated my shoulder. And once I was on the ground, he pulled a knife. He'd never used a weapon before. And my mom sat there and _watched_, drink in hand, as my own damn father cut me open, again and again.I guess he figured since I drained his beer, he was going to drain my blood. It only seemed fair, an eye for an eye. There was nothing I could do but lie there and take it and beg for my life, Lexie. And thank god my mom had the brains to realize that things would really get serious if I was killed. That was my saving grace, Lexie. Not her love for her child, or her sympathy for my agony. But her fear of being caught and rotting in a jail cell." Alice finally finished. Tears literally poured down her face and she tried to choke down sobs.

Lexie found herself sobbing as well, shocked that teenager had finally opened up to her. "I'm so, so sorry Alice." She told the girl. Alice finally let a sob escape, but couldn't stop the ones that followed after.

Hesitantly, Lexie pulled Alice into a hug, expecting to be pushed away. However, the 15 year old actually wrapped her arms around her and returned the embrace. Lexie held her close, rubbing her back and feeling the 15 year old's body shake with sobs. But one specific sentence that the girl had spoken kept replaying in her mind: _and not all of them are from him._

* * *

><p>Eventually Alice's sobs quieted. Her eyes were red and sore, and she physically couldn't cry anymore. The awful recount of the story sobered her up pretty damn quick. Lexie hadn't said anything since, just sat there and held her as she cried weeks' worth of pent up sorrow. She shifted and pulled away from Lexie, who sighed and assumed that the snarky, mean girl was back, but Alice simply shifted her weight before spreading out on the couch, head resting in Lexie's lap and arms wrapped around her. Lexie was caught off guard, but thrilled that the girl hadn't stormed off. The two dozed off on the couch together.<p>

* * *

><p>A few hours later Lexie was woken up by the sound of the door opening. Callie crept in and clicked the door shut as softly as she could. "Lex-" She started to call out but cut herself off as she saw her on the couch with the still sleeping Alice.<p>

"What… is she okay?" Callie couldn't make sense of why the malicious teen would be so peacefully settled with Lexie.

Lexie glanced down at Alice, who stirred and mumbled something incoherent. A few seconds later she opened her eyes and sat up. She blinked rapidly a few time and looked around, still slightly disorientated with sleep. Her brain seemed to finally register the Latina doctor's presence and she offered a small smile. "Oh hey, Callie…" Her gaze focused on the box of donuts that she held. "Do you mind?" She asked hand halfway outstretched. Callie shook her head and watched the girl snag the honey cruller. She nibbled on the edge and turned to Lexie.

"Uhh, did I pass out on you?" She asked, embarrassment coloring her tone. Lexie nodded. "No worries, Alice. You were exhausted." She smiled at the girl who turned beet red. "Going to make coffee." She mumbled and dashed out of the living room, glad for the excuse to leave.

"Okay… so she was a poisonous bitch," Callie glanced at her phone "four hours ago and is now all perky and nice? What gives?"

Lexie dropped her voice. "She snapped. Big time. We had a huge screaming match and then she started sobbing and explained what happened that night with her father." Lexie blinked a few tears away. "After getting it out, she kinda just collapsed and fell asleep with me." Lexie shrugged. "Maybe she just needed to get it off her chest," she shuddered "it's awful, what happened to her Callie. It makes me nauseous just thinking about it. And there was something else she said, 'not all of the cuts were from him'. I worry that she has been harming herself." Lexie's tone was filled with concern.

Callie nodded sadly. "We all have the day off, I'll call Arizona over here. She has dealt with a lot of this before. Let Alice tell us her story when she's ready, and just maybe she'll be able to let Arizona start to help her."

_**Hey guys. So we hope you enjoyed this chapter. Please leave some reviews! :D**_


	19. Chapter 19

"So, who's this dinner guest?" Alice asked as she started to wash the lettuce. Lexie glanced up from the stovetop where she was frying a pan of onions. She shrugged mysteriously and set the spoon down to go grab the olive oil.

"Well, it's obviously not any of your resident groupies, the most they get is free wine and pizza ordered in." Alice continued to press for information. Lexie opened her mouth to say something but was cut off by the bleeping of the fire alarm. She whipped her head around and saw that the onions were smoking. "Shit!" She blurted as she dashed for the stove and pulled off the pan. She flipped the heat off and started to inspect the onions.

"Ugh, damnit!" She mumbled. "These can't still pass as caramelized, can they?" She asked hopefully. Alice glanced at the pan and laughed. "Not a chance." She replied and stepped aside so Lexie could dump the severely burnt onions into the garbage.

"Can you do me a favor and start chopping the onions while I get this chicken started?" Lexie asked the girl, who was up to her arms in lettuce. She sighed and shoved the romaine away, snatching the towel off of its railing on the oven door. She grabbed a cutting board from under the sink and went to fetch some new onions. Alice got to work peeling the skin off. They worked in silence for a few moments, Lexie concentrating on the task at hand.

The old of the two let out an exaggerated sigh. "Boooring." She announced and turned the radio on. "Marry the Night" blared from the speakers. "Score!" She squealed and cranked up the volume.

"Mmmfonimmf." Was all that Lexie could hear coming from Alice over the blasting music and frying on the stove accompanied by the stovetop fan.

" What?" She shouted and leaned away from the stove.

"I said I'm done peeling the onions!" Alice repeated.

"Ohhh! Here, start chopping them." Lexie handed her a knife and went back to the meat, determined not to ruin it as well.

Alice grabbed the knife from Lexie. Something familiar caught her eye. She glanced at it again. The logo loomed mockingly, and the shape and style was sickeningly recognizable. She gasped as she realized why the knife was so familiar. Alice dropped it like it had burned her and skittered back as it clattered to the floor. Lexie glanced up in alarm. She shut the radio off and pulled the chicken off of the heat.

"What's wrong?" She asked in a panicked tone. "T..he… k…kn…knife. It's th…e sa…me." She managed to choke out as she continued to back away from where it rested on the floor. Lexie's face flickered with understanding and she hurried to snatch it off of the floor. She tucked it under the towel and slowly turned back to Alice, who looked like she was about to snap any second.

"Alice, what do you need right now?" She asked in a soothing tone, trying not to frighten the girl any more by handling this the wrong way.

"I… I need to get out of here." Her voice quaked with fear. Lexie nodded.

"Absolutely." She grabbed her cell and punched in a number. The caller answered on the first ring. "Arizona, it's me. Do you think you can come and pick up Alice and bring her over to your place for a few hours?" She asked. A few seconds pause. "Sure." Lexie said and hung up. "Arizona is coming. She's going to let you stay with her and Callie for a few hours, is that alright?" She asked quietly. Alice gulped and nodded, and with that she flitted out of the kitchen. Lexie let out a worried sigh. Alice's footsteps filled the house as she paced at the front door.

Lexie leaned against the counter in the kitchen and ran her fingers through her hair. She sighed and glanced at the clock again. It would only take Arizona and Callie ten minutes, tops, to get there. Lexie debated whether or not to go and try to comfort the girl, or just let her have her alone time. It was when she heard the door open and then slam shut that she made up her mind.

* * *

><p>Alice sat down on the top porch step and shivered. She wasn't sure if it was from the cold, or her nerves, but she wrapped her arms around herself anyway. Her breath clouded in front of her in the frigid air and she looked around the empty street. She had to admit, she was really craving a cigarette, but had decided to quit, for Lexie's sake. But one wouldn't hurt, would it? There was still a half empty pack in her room that she had yet to get rid of...no, no, Arizona or Callie would smell the smoke on her. So Alice sat there, leg rapidly rising and falling anxiously, trying to keep warm.<p>

"You should of at least grabbed a hoodie." Alice whirled around on the step as the voice cut through her thoughts. Warm light hit her from the house, as Lexie had opened the door and now stood there. Seeing that she had startled the already on edge girl, she apologized. "Sorry."

"It's fine." Alice replied as the door shut and Lexie came to sit beside her.

"So, do you want to talk about anything?" Lexie asked. The last thing she needed was for the girl to start holding things in again. Alice shook her head and rested her chin on her knees.

The two girls sat beside each other for the next few minutes in silence. Lexie watched in concern as Alice shivered every so often and goose bumps rose up on her bare arms. She herself was freezing, and was even wearing a cardigan.

* * *

><p>At last, Arizona and Callie pulled up in their car and stopped by the curb. "Tell them I'm grabbing a hoodie." Alice mumbled as she stood up and went in the house. Lexie stood up as well and hurried to the waiting car.<p>

"What's going on?" Callie asked as she rolled down her window.

"We were cooking in the kitchen and then she went to cut the onions, but the knife was the same as the one her father used on her. I think it triggered flashbacks or something." Lexie explained quickly, "She was just sitting on the porch until you guys got here and just seemed really...distant." Lexie finished, glancing behind her. Alice was just now standing in the doorway, pulling her hoodie on.

"We'll try to talk to her." Arizona assured the younger woman. Lexie nodded and then leaned away from the car.

Alice walked off of the porch to the idling car. She gave Lexie a faint smile, though it probably looked more like a grimace, and got into the backseat. Lexie gave a small wave as the car took off and then looked up to see another car pulling up to the curb.

* * *

><p>Alice kept her gaze averted out the window. Neither Arizona or Callie asked about what happened in the kitchen, and Alice didn't offer anything. Alice sat silently as Callie and Arizona filled the silence with chat about work. Finally the blue car pulled into its spot in the driveway and Alice hopped out as soon as the engine shut off. She paced as Callie unlocked the door.<p>

Alice stepped into the house hesitantly and glanced around. The mix of Callie's love for monochromatics and Arizona's love for cheerful decor should have clashed but it blended together in perfect harmony. Alice kept her gaze averted out the window.

"Pasta was the plan for dinner, you good with that?" Callie, who had made her way into the kitchen called out. "Sounds good." Alice called back. "Just no goddamn onions." She muttered under her breath. Arizona, who was also in the living room, chuckled lightly. Alice felt her lips tip up in a dry smile.

"So fucked up it's pathetic." She mumbled. "Hey!" Arizona frowned. "I don't know the whole story but from what I've heard, no one would survive that unscathed." Her tone was adamant. Alice simply shrugged. She leaned forward and grabbed the remote off of the coffee table and turned the TV on to fill the silence. She was channel surfing when it came to Scream 4. It just so happened to be the very scene where Anna Paquin is being stabbed.

"Shit!" Alice shut the TV off and tossed the remote beside her. "Every damn thing is a trigger. A knife, the smell of alcohol, closed spaces, hell even physical contact! I can't even do everyday tasks without tweaking the hell out." She shuddered.

Do you want to talk about it?" Arizona asked just as Callie came in from putting the water on the stove. Alice shrugged, unsure if she wanted to really let two more people in.

"Well then how about if I start and we go from there?" The blonde suggested carefully. Alice nodded somewhat reluctantly and leaned back into the couch.

"Alright, do you want to tell us what happened with Mark the other day?" Arizona suggested, trying to find something to start with. Alice tensed up and the doctor was afraid she'd pushed for too much.

"It's just...something about him reminds me of my father. I know Mark wouldn't hurt me, but when I saw him...it wasn't Mark standing there. And I guess I just freaked." Alice paused a few times as she spoke.

"How about what happened that night? You were pretty banged up." Arizona said, trying to get the girl to open up completely.

Alice's eyes widened and she shifted nervously. Her fingers drummed anxiously on her knee and she took a deep breath before beginning her recollection of what had happened.

* * *

><p>By the time Alice finished, her voice was shaking and tears were welling in her eyes. Both Callie and Arizona were fighting back tears of their own as they listened to the horrible story. Lexie had been right about how nauseating it was just to think about it. Finally, Callie spoke.<br>"Lexie told me about something you said and it's really concerned all of us. 'Not all of them are from him'? Alice...are you self-harming?"

Alice's head snapped up and she focused her gaze on Callie. Her eyes took on a dangerous glint. Slowly she unzipped her hoodie, and then pulled her t-shirt off. In only a bra the full extent of her injuries were highlighted. To Callie's dismay, fresh cuts were spread across her stomach. "I don't know, Callie. Why don't you tell me? I mean there are already so many scars, what's a few more to help ease the pain?"

Arizona shifted uneasily as they watched the old Alice come to play as her voice took on a cold and mean tone. The blonde doctor sighed wearily. "I think you need some help Alice." She suggested gently. Alice glared at her.

"No. No more people." She flat out refused. She broke her glare away and pulled her shirt back on. "I think it's time we talk about something else." The sentence was a suggestion, but her tone left no room for argument.

"Alice, this isn't okay. You could cut too deep, they could get infected-" Callie pushed back. She wasn't used to taking orders from a 15 year old, and her concern for the girl had gotten the best of her.  
>"You think I don't know that? Of course I do, I live in a house full of doctors." Alice snapped back. She was dreading the fact that Lexie would find out what she had been hiding since she had arrived at the house.<p>

"Look. I get you're scared, and hurt, and sincerely fucked up inside, but when you do things like this, you aren't only destroying yourself. I know you maybe don't believe it, but Lexie cares about you a whole hell of a lot more than you act like. And so does everyone else. So the least you can do is TRY to let us help you." Callie's tone was harsher than she meant it to come out, but her point got across. Alice's glare softened and she sat back down on the couch, letting out a heavy sigh as she did so.

"Are you going to tell Lexie?" She asked, though she felt that she already knew the answer.

"She was the one who told us about what you said, so she kind of thinks you are." Arizona admitted.

"She's probably about ready to send me to the Psych Ward considering I can't cook a goddamn meal without having a mental breakdown." Alice sounded absolutely disgusted with herself.

"Out of everyone in like..the world, you definitely have the most right to have the occasional mental breakdown." Callie told the teenager, who actually cracked a smile.  
>"Oh my God, I forgot I was cooking!" Callie said suddenly, leaping up from the house. It was then that the other two noticed the faint smell of burning pasta.<br>After a few minutes, Callie returned from the kitchen. "There's been a slight change in plan. Dinner has been changed to PB&J's." She said sheepishly. Arizona and Alice both smirked and followed the Latina doctor into the kitchen.

* * *

><p>Mark and Lexie sat at the table, empty plates in front of them. Lexie had managed to fix the rest of the dinner without disaster. They had gone through the whole meal avoiding the one topic that was eating away at both of them; Alice. Finally, Lexie knew it was time to bring it up.<p>

"So I guess you're wondering about her?" Lexie said nervously. Mark nodded.

"I just want to know what I did." He sighed, leaning back in the chair.

"You should know she doesn't hate you. It's just...you remind her of her dad." Alice told the older man. His eyebrows came together in concern.

"What happened to her Lexie?" He asked, thinking of all of the cuts and bruises he had seen on the girl before she had fled to the bathroom.

"Her father...he attacked her. And then he cut her with a knife while her mom watched. The bastards realized she was probably going to die, so they dumped her at the hospital and skipped town." Lexie shortened the story Alice had told her. She watched as Mark's face reddened with anger.

"Those fucking...goddamn it." Mark couldn't even think of what to call the girl's parents, and he slammed his fist onto the table. Lexie jumped as the silverware clanked.

"I know. I've got custody of her, for now anyways." Lexie replied, shaking her head. She wondered how the girl was doing over with Callie and Arizona.

"How are we supposed to make her not have a breakdown every time I come over?" Mark asked, rubbing his eyes.

"Well...maybe you could shave your beard." Lexie suggested, staring at the facial hair. She cracked a smirk and Mark chuckled.

"If it would help...I'll shave the beard." The man laughed, stroking at the course hair.  
>Lexie smiled and he smiled back at her.<p>

"She's been getting better. I mean, she used to be bad, like really, really bad. She came home either high or drunk at least four times. But then she just kind of, broke down and started letting me in again." Lexie told him. She sipped at her wine and remembered the night that she came into the kitchen to see Alice downing two glasses of Merlot.

"Well, she'll get there." Sloan replied and Lexie nodded.

The two adults moved on to lighter topic of conversation. Eventually, the time came when Mark stood up and drank the last of his wine. "I guess I better go, I've got a surgery pretty early tomorrow." He said almost regretfully. Lexie nodded. The two looked at each other for a couple of moments. Their past quarrels were forgotten as they both leaned in, almost like an impulse, and kissed

* * *

><p>By the time the three had finished their "dinner" it had gotten late. They sat around the table in a tense silence, stealing glances off of each other. Finally, Arizona spoke.<p>

"Alice, can you let me take a look at the cuts?" She asked gently. The girl immediately shook her head and dropped her gaze.

"I'm not going to hurt you or anything. I just think I saw one that was a little too deep." The blonde said, trying to convince the stubborn girl. Once, again Alice shook her head. Her gaze had hardened again.

"Come on, we're just going to make sure they're alright." Callie chimed in. Alice stood up from the table suddenly. "No." She snarled.

"Would you just quit being so goddamn stubborn for one second and let someone help you?" Arizona's voice had raised and Alice flinched. Nevertheless, her jaw locked as she shook her head again.  
>Arizona stood up as well and took a couple steps towards the 15 year old. Alice stepped backwards, in sync with the doctor's steps.<p>

Callie watched as a spark of fear flashed through Alice's eyes and stood up as well. She was just about to tell Arizona to back off a bit when the blonde doctor reached for the bottom of Alice's shirt and slowly lifted it up.

Alice's breath caught in her throat as she felt her shirt being lifted up a bit. She focused on trying to remind herself that it was just Arizona, but still felt panic rising in her chest. When the doctor's fingers brushed gently across her abdomen, her nerves snapped.

She leapt back, but the kitchen wall blocked her from putting very much space between her and Arizona. Arizona rolled her eyes and put an arm across her chest, and Alice was trapped. Panic flared up into her as her brain went into overdrive. "Arizona! Let me go, _now_!" Her tone was dead serious as she yelled at the doctor. Arizona ignored her and continued to look at the cuts. Alice was suddenly furious. Arizona had no right to ignore her requests like that.

The cheerleader part that Alice had told Lexie months ago was not a total lie, and although she was petite she was damn strong. Her willpower snapped and she forced her way out of Arizona's grasp. Once she was free from the trap she turned on the startled Arizona. There was a predatory, wild glint in her eyes and everything about her promised danger.

"Alice! Alice, stop. She won't touch you again, I promise." Callie tried to calm the furious, threatened teenager. Callie's voice snapped Alice out of her intense fixation and she reluctantly stepped away. "Can you please take me home?" She asked Callie as she turned her back on Arizona. Callie nodded, relieved that things hadn't escalated. She grabbed her keys from the key bowl by the front door and followed Alice out to the car.

_**Hey guys, sorry it took us a bit longer to update this time. Thanks for the reviews and your patience. This chapter was a bit longer, and we hope you enjoyed it.**_


	20. Chapter 20

_**Songspiration- Brandi Carlile : That Wasn't Me**_

Alice sat quietly next to Callie as the Latina doctor drove towards Lexie's house. Her arms were wrapped around herself protectively and her gaze was focused on the window. Callie stole glances off of her every so often, and she was sure she had seen the girl tremble a few times, strung out on nerves no doubt.

Finally, Callie braked her car by the curb and shut off the engine. She unbuckled her seatbelt and started to get out when she noticed Alice hadn't moved an inch. "You coming?" She asked, trying to catch Alice's gaze. The girl nodded somewhat reluctantly and got out of the car.

Callie opened the front door to the house and Alice shuffled in after her. Exhaustion was evident on the girl's face as she looked up at Lexie, who was in the living room. She nodded at the woman before slowly beginning to climb the stairs.

"Is she alright?" Lexie whispered to Callie after noticing the grim look on the girl's face. Callie shook her head.

"You were right. She's cutting herself. She showed us; they're all across her stomach. And there was a pretty deep one, but she flipped when Arizona tried to treat it." Callie told her. Lexie shook her head and sighed.

"On the bright side, she does consider this home now." Callie told the concerned woman. Lexie's eyebrows raised in surprise.

"Really? She said so?" That was a good sign, right? That she felt at home? Lexie asked herself.  
>Callie nodded and then yawned.<p>

"Well, I'm going to get back to the apartment. I've got like four hours before I have to be at the hospital again." The Latina doctor said. Lexie nodded and then started up the stairs to Alice's room.

Lexie knocked softly on Alice's door. "Come in." A muffled voice called out. Lexie pushed the door open and saw Alice flopped on her bed with her head buried under a pillow. She sat down on a corner of the bed. Lexie tapped her leg impatiently when the girl didn't move.

"Leave me alone." Alice grumbled as she shoved the pillow off and sat up.

"You're coming with me to work tomorrow." Lexie stated.

"What?" This caught Alice's attention.

"You heard me. I've set you up with a friend of mine that I think you should meet." Lexie continued. The smaller girl rolled her eyes.

"Whatever, Lexie." The petulant teen turned away from the surgeon and went back to ignoring her. Lexie was slightly put off by the girl's cold shoulder, but she understood that it wasn't personal. It was Alice's way of protecting herself, by building up a defensive wall and avoiding people. Lexie sighed but let the girl be as she slipped out of the room to get ready for her 8-8 shift.

Lexie wiped off her makeup and proceeded to wash her face. The green tea scrub always left her feeling refreshed after a long day. She wiped the water out of her eyes and caught her reflection in the mirror. She watched a smile spread across her face as she remembered the evening with Mark. Even if things with Lexie weren't perfect, her relationship with Mark seemed to be back on track. He had even decided to shave off that god awful beard for Alice's sake.

Lexie slipped into some shorts and a cami and walked quietly down the hallway. Alice's door was open. Lexie popped her head in to see Alice sitting by the window, staring out into the street vacantly.

"Goodnight, Alice." She said softly. Alice glanced up startled, but smiled softly.

"Night." She replied before looking back out the window. Lexie leaned out of the room and shut the door.

* * *

><p>"Lexie?" The voice snapped the sleeping doctor awake and she flew up in the bed. "Wha?" She mumbled sleepily. Alice stood at the foot of her bed, holding a hand to her stomach.<p>

"Yeah, what's wrong? Are you sick?" Lexie was awake immediately. Alice wouldn't come to her, especially in the middle of the night, for something unless it was serious.

"One of the cuts...it really hurts. It was the one Arizona was trying to look at." Alice said softly.

"You want me to look at it?" Lexie asked, wanting to make sure she wouldn't intrude on the girl and make her uncomfortable again. Alice nodded almost nervously as Lexie turned the bedside lamp on. The 15 year old perched on the bed and removed her hand from her abdomen. Lexie gently rolled up the shirt and suppressed a gasp. Even though she knew Alice had self-harmed, it was still shocking to see the actual cuts. One especially deep one stuck out, and Lexie assumed it was the one bothering the girl.

"You cut yourself pretty deep here." The doctor said, leaning down to examine the laceration closer.

"I didn't mean to. It just kind of happened." Alice replied quietly. Her hands gripped the bed tightly, and it was obvious that she was anxious about allowing so much physical contact.

"Well, it doesn't look infected. Just put some Neosporin on it and a bandage and you should be fine." Lexie told her, rolling the shirt back down. Alice nodded and sighed.

"Alice...I know I can't make you, but would you please at least try to stop?" Lexie asked just as Alice was about to leave. The 15 year old gave her a sad look, but nodded as she went back out into the hallway. She stopped at the doorway and turned back around.

"Thanks. And I'm really sorry Lexie." Her voice was barely audible and Lexie struggled to see if there were tears forming in her eyes or not.

"About what?" The young woman replied, tilting her head to the side.

"Just...everything." Alice said as she left the room.

* * *

><p>Alice was dreaming that she was in paradise. Her toes were scrunched in the sand as she lay sprawled on a perfect beach. The wind rustled the leaves on the coconut tree, and the coconuts started knocking softly together. That knocking grew louder until it was all she could hear. Finally she woke up and registered the fact that it was Lexie banging on her door.<p>

"What?" She groaned sleepily.

"Get up, Alice! We're leaving in half an hour!" Lexie called out.

"You're leaving in half an hour." Alice corrected her, turning over and closing her eyes. She heard the door swing open but she ignored it. The bed shifted as Lexie sat down on the mattress.

"C'mon, Alice. She rearranged her entire day for you, cleared her schedule. You're coming." Lexie's tone was firm. Alice finally sat up and glared at Lexie through squinted eyes.

"I have no idea why I even have to come but this had better be damn good." She got out of bed and stalked over to the dresser and yanked out a pair of skinny jeans. She turned to Lexie. "Out." She growled irritably. Lexie rolled her eyes but left.

* * *

><p>Alice made her way into the kitchen fully dressed and made up 20 minutes later. She poured herself a mug of coffee and leaned against the counter. Lexie hurried into the kitchen dressed in scrubs. She glanced at Alice's mug of coffee.<p>

"No breakfast?" She asked, shooting her a look of reprimand as the rail thin teenager shook her head.

"Not a morning person." She replied and tossed back the contents of her cup. She placed the mug in the sink and strode out of the house to wait in the car. Lexie followed her out and proceeded to drive them to the hospital.

"So, seriously. Who is this person that you're making me see? I'm all healed up, promise." Alice sounded irritated, but Lexie detected a hint of uncertainty in the girl's voice. She had some major trust issues, and was really only totally comfortable around Lexie, so the idea of meeting and spending the day with someone new made her feel totally vulnerable.

Lexie ignored the question and pulled into her spot in the parking lot. She glanced over at Alice who was as white as a sheet and sitting stiffly in her seat as she looked at the hospital, where she had nothing but awful memories to associate it with. Lexie smiled comfortingly and slid an arm around the trembling girl's waist. She could sense her hesitation about going in but Alice reluctantly tagged along into the building.

Flickers of recognition and whispers followed Alice as all of the doctors remembered her as the only shot patient and the kid who had been nearly beaten to death by her father. She paid no attention to where she was going or the people around her. Lexie finally stopped in front of an office. Alice dragged her downward cast eyes up to look at the nameplate on the door.

"Jessica Lewis, Psychology." Alice's voice trailed after she read the nameplate. She turned to Lexie and shook her head. "No." She said simply, turning around and starting down the hallway.

"Alice, just give it a chance. She can help you." Lexie put a hand on the girl's shoulder, stopping her from walking away. Alice turned back around, and looked at Lexie with a tired, unamused glare.  
>Before Alice could reply with a snarky comment, the door opened and a young woman stepped out. Alice raised her eyebrow as the woman smiled warmly.<p>

Alice locked eyes with the young psychologist and glared at her icily. Jessica chuckled and turned away from her, putting her back to the teenager, who couldn't make sense of the way that she had been totally ignored.

Jessica whispered something to Lexie, who gave a stressed glance towards Alice and then replied in an equally low tone. "Thanks again so much for taking the time to see her." Lexie said in a normal tone before hugging the redhead.

"No worries. Have a good surgery!" She called out as Lexie started towards the doors of the wing. Jessica glanced at the moody teenager, who was on high alert and severely defensive.

"Sooooo... my office. C'mon in." She filled the silence. Alice stood in place.

"Fuck that." She snapped, the darkest part of her taking over.

"Wow, okay. You're a major bitch, I'm so not going this whole day without a huge latte, so you can come with or you can stay here but you sure as hell can't leave this wing." Jessica replied firmly.

* * *

><p>Lexie couldn't keep her mind off of Alice as she started scrubbing in for her next surgery. Would the bullheaded teenager let Jessica in? Lexie had a lot of faith in her friend, but she knew how defensive Alice could be.<p>

The young doctor jumped as she heard the door open behind her. She turned away from the sink to see Mark standing there. "Hey." He said, smiling. Lexie smiled back. He was so much cuter without his beard.

"Alice is with Jessica today." Lexie told the man. His eyebrows raised in surprise.

"How the hell did you get her to do that?" He asked, turning the sink faucet on and getting soap.

"She wasn't too happy about it, but somehow I managed to convince her." Lexie replied, shaking the water off of her hands.

"Do you think it will help?" Mark asked, lathering the soap in between his big hands. Lexie shrugged.

"It depends on if she'll let it." Lexie said. Mark nodded.

* * *

><p>The young redhead placed a hand on her hip as she waited for an answer. Alice managed to refrain herself from flipping her off as she stalked past her and into the office. The door swung shut and Alice swore that she could hear the doctor chuckling softly. Alice's stubborn nature was battling with her desire for a latte. She sighed and reluctantly followed the therapist down to the Starbucks in the atrium.<p>

Jessica stopped as she heard footsteps behind her. Alice caught up and started down the hall without saying anything. They walked in silence to the Starbucks line that was several people. Alice signed loudly.

"I'm gonna go to the bathroom." She told Jessica, motioning in the direction of the bathroom that sat just around the corner.

"Kay." Jessica nodded. Alice walked towards the bathroom, but once she was around the corner she bypassed it. When she was sure that she was out of Jessica's line of sight, she booked it down the hall, sprinting for the elevators. She pushed the button rapidly and finally one came. She stepped in and hit the door close button.

Alice was home free; Jessica would have one hell of a time finding her in such a huge building. She pressed the button for the 6th floor and waited patiently. The elevator dinged and the doors opened. Alice stepped off and walked down the hall inconspicuously. No one gave her a second glance. She slipped into a cleaning supply closet and dragged a cart in front of the door before sinking to the floor with a grin. The teenager pulled out her Blackberry and grinned. Now all she had to do was wait for the panicked calls and frantic search to ensue, while she sat without a care in the world, totally free from that awful psychologist.

* * *

><p>Jessica thanked the girl for her latte and glanced around, concern mounting by the second. It had been well over ten minutes. Alice had tricked her, and Jessica was furious at herself for falling into the teenager's trap. She walked briskly in the direction of the washrooms. Her heart sank as she saw the elevators just beyond them. Alice had snuck away, and could be anywhere in this huge hospital.<p>

Jessica sighed and contemplated her options. She turned around and headed for her office.

Once in the quiet confides of her office, she had a chance to gather her thoughts. She pulled out her cell and grabbed the list that Lexie had left her. She scanned the sheet of paper until her eyes fell on Alice's number. She dialed it quickly and listened to the line ring. On the fourth ring, Alice picked up.

"Jessica." Her tone was laced with amusement.

"Great little trick there, Houdini. Now give it up and get your skinny tush back to my office." Jessica tried to hold back the anger. Alice's laughter rang into the phone.

"Oh, but I don't think you're in the position for giving orders my dear. I have the upper hand here." She reminded her.

"I'll call Lexie, god help us both, because she will be beyond mad." Jessica threatened.

"Go ahead. See if I care. Perhaps the extra pair of eyes will be helpful in trying to find me. Seattle Grace is a huge hospital after all. Might I just point out that I am the hide and seek master. Bonne chance, mon ami." Jessica was about to lose it when the line went dead. She tossed her phone down in anger and sat back, trying to get a plan together. She decided that her best course of action would be to wait. Alice would give it up eventually, searching the entire unit let alone hospital would be an impossible task, and a waste of time. She pulled out a book from her shelf and sat down on her chair with her latte, ready for a long wait.

* * *

><p>It had been an hour and a half. Alice was bored, irritated, and now...hungry. Groaning, she stood up and stretched her now stiff muscles. Various bones popped and cracked as she made her way to the door. Alice slowly opened the closet and peeked out into the hallway. Finding that the coast was clear, she slipped out into the hall and began towards the cafeteria.<p>

Alice had kept her eyes peeled the whole way down to the cafeteria. She didn't see any sign of Jessica, but stopped once she was outside of the cafeteria, which was bustling with doctors. Alice took a couple minutes to scan the large room for the psych doctor or Lexie. Finding that neither of them were in the room, she relaxed and walked in.

Just as Alice had made it to the line of doctors and nurses, she heard her name being called from behind her. Sighing, the teenager turned around to find Callie looking at her questioningly.

"Oh, hi." Alice replied, thinking of explanations in her head.

"What are you doing here?" The Hispanic woman asked, tilting her head to the side. Why the hell was Alice wandering around the hospital by herself, with Lexie nowhere in sight?

"Just, you know, visiting." Alice liked quickly, forcing a nervous smile.

"There's my favorite patient." The new voice interrupted Alice and Callie's conversation. Turning, Alice came face to face with Jessica, who slung an arm around her shoulders.

"Yay, the devil shrink." Alice muttered. Callie stifled a laugh and raised her eyebrows.

"Well, we best be off." Jessica said, pulling Alice with her towards the exit. Alice mouthed the words "help me" at Callie, who chuckled a bit, but waved goodbye.

"Let go of me." Alice hissed. "Fat chance." Jessica replied. Alice's nerves were building as the familiar feeling of panic from being trapped started to settle in the pit of her stomach.

"I'm not kidding." Alice insisted. "Neither am I." Jess said adamantly. Alice turned back to glance at Callie.

"Callie!" She called out, getting the doctor's attention. Jessica stopped walking with reluctance. "Make her let go." She mouthed. Even from a distance, Alice's discomfort and fear was evident.

"Jessica!" Callie called out. The shrink turned around. She motioned for her to let go of Alice. Jessica raised her eyebrow and lifted her arm, and the teenager immediately distanced herself.

They made their way back to the office in a tense silence. Alice reluctantly stepped in when she approached the door. Jessica grabbed her leather notebook and sat down on one of the chairs as the door swung shut. Alice stood in place, dreading having to sit down and converse.

"Sit." Jessica motioned for the chair. Alice dragged her feet over to the chair that was farthest from the one that Jessica was occupying.

"Not a smart thing to do, Alice." Jessica said quietly.

"Oh, what's the matter? Worried that some lunatic with a gun is gonna shoot me down or something? Oh wait, that's already happened." Alice rolled her eyes.

"What has she told you," she asked in an icy tone full of malice.

"Not much. Just that you're the girl that was shot, and had some family issues so you're staying with her." Jess replied.

"So, why don't we start with those trust issues of yours?" Jessica suggested, clicking the pen she had in her hand. Alice's jaw locked and she arched an eyebrow.  
>"Why exactly should I tell you about my 'issues'? I mean, we haven't really gotten along well, have we?" The teenager retorted. She crossed her arms in front of her, an action Jessica recognized as a sign of insecurity.<br>"Now you don't want me to give Lexie a bad report, do you?." Jessica replied. Alice scowled at her.  
>"Maybe I don't have any issues and just don't like the people who say I do." She snarled. Jessica chuckled and started writing in her leather notebook.<br>"Let me guess; 'shows obvious signs of bitchyness'?" Alice said as she noticed the woman writing.  
>"Something along those lines." Jessica replied, though it was a lie. She hadn't written anything really. Pretending to write something about her patients was a ploy she sometimes used to get them to talk.<br>"Let me tell you something. You're one of the people I don't like." Alice said, sighing.  
>"Please, enlighten me." Jessica retorted sarcastically.<br>"For one, you're pushy. And bitchy. And honestly, you seem like a terrible psychiatrist. For someone who works with mental patients, I figured it would be a little harder to sneak away from you. But all I had to do is say that I had to use the bathroom." Alice told the older woman. Jessica took in a deep breath and waited a couple of seconds before responding.  
>"You know, I've never had a patient try to run away from me. And I've dealt with some pretty psychotic people. So does that make you the craziest?" The doctor said. Alice didn't reply.<br>Jessica waited five minutes for the teenager to say anything else. "Well, since you've decided to play the quiet game, I'm going to get a bit of work done. Let me know when you're done being stubborn." Jessica said, getting up from the leather chair and returning to her desk.

After a few minutes , Alice got bored with sitting around. "How long is this stupid appointment going to take?" She asked impatiently. Jess glanced at the clock.

"Lexie will be back in an hour." Jess replied as she returned to the chair. "Ready for round two already?" Alice smirked.

"Sure." The teenager replied sarcastically.  
>"Why don't you tell me about your parents?" Alice flinched visibly at the question, but quickly regained her composure.<br>"There's not much to tell." The girl replied quietly, still managing to keep a cold tone to her voice.  
>"Really? Because based on your medical records, there is." Alice's head flew up and her eyes locked on the charts the psychiatrist was now reading from.<br>"Five broken ribs, a dislocated shoulder, nineteen lacerations, severe contusions. Doesn't sound like nothing to me." Jessica said, returning her gaze to Alice, who had grown tenser. The girl didn't reply.  
>"Well I'll tell you what I think. I think that they beat the crap out of you, left you for dead, and abandoned you." Alice averted her gaze and subconsciously squeezed the arm of the chair.<br>"I'm getting somewhere, aren't I?" Jessica asked. Getting no response, she pressed onward.  
>"Can I take a guess? They made you think you deserved it. Beat the fight out of you. Made you give up. Were they drunk Alice?"<br>Alice couldn't get the psychiatrist's voice out of her head. Lexie had to have told her more than what she admitted, because the woman was hitting everything spot on. Flashbacks flew through her head, and she struggled to stop them.  
>"Please, just shut up." Alice finally said. Her voice shook.<br>"And then you ended up getting lucky enough to be in Lexie's care. Except you keep up that snarky, bitchy attitude so no one can tell how scared you are. Because I know underneath all of your 'badass' you're just a scared teenage girl"

"You're wrong," Alice's voice was unconvincing.

"No, I'm right. So right." Jessica replied. "Tell me, Alice. Take me back to the night where they damn near killed you." Jess demanded. Alice couldn't stop the trembling now. "You came home, a few blows here and there. Nothing new." Jess prompted.

Alice's breathing had quickened and she wanted nothing more than for the woman to stop talking. Every word was getting inside her head more and more. She wanted Lexie. No, she needed Lexie with her, now.  
>"Was it your mother, or your father?" Alice flinched as Jessica said 'father', and the psychiatrist took it as her answer.<br>"So it was your dad? What made him do it? Was dinner late? Or maybe not enough beer? Come on Alice, tell me." Jessica pressed. Alice's face had paled and her heartbeat had quickened.  
>"Can we please stop?" She asked breathlessly.<br>"After you tell me what happened." Jessica insisted. She had gotten this far, and wasn't about to give up.  
>Alice silenced herself again and focused her eyes on the floor.<br>"I'm going to tell you what I think happened. After whatever happened that set him off, he snapped. And judging by your injuries, I bet he took everything out on you. Hit you, pushed you to the ground, made you feel helpless. And then, he pulled out some sort of blade, a knife maybe, and he cut you-" Jessica stopped when she heard a sob. She looked up from her notebook just in time to see Alice spring up from the chair and run towards the door. Just as Jessica got up to stop her, the door opened and Lexie stood there.

"Oh my god, Lexie," She sobbed unabashedly as she stumbled into the bewildered surgeon's arms. Jess watched in surprise as Lexie was able to talk the distraught teen down in under a minute. Alice, who was defiant and mean towards the psychiatrist, was docile and willing with Lexie. Any animosity she felt towards Lexie for sending her to Jess seemed irrelevant now as Lexie spoke quietly until Alice's tears stopped. The teen sighed heavily and wiped at her mascara stained face.

"Hey, why don't you go hang out with Callie for a bit? I'll come by and get you in like ten minutes, but I have to talk with Jessica first." The brunette suggested. Alice nodded and gave Jessica a parting glare full of hatred before turning and stalking down the hall. Lexie turned her attention to Jess for the first time.

"How dare you. I sent her here for you to HELP her, not DESTROY EVERYTHING THAT WE HAVE WORKED TO COME TO!" Jessica had never seen Lexie quite as mad as she was now.

"Hold up, you think what I was doing was redundant? I was getting somewhere with her, until you showed up! Things have to get ugly before they can get better, Lexie." Jessica defended herself.

"I told you what happened to her. Why the hell did you have to rehash it and torment her with it by making her live it again?" Lexie glared at her.

"At least I was able to get somewhere. She pulled a fast one on me and ditched me using the bathroom as an excuse to get out of my sight and then booked it to the elevator and hid for an hour and a half, god only knows where she was. I only managed to track her down when Callie was chatting with her in the cafeteria. I am not the evil bitch here, Lexie." She said adamantly.

"Really now? Then will you please explain to me why she just had another breakdown?" Lexie yelled. After everything she had gone through with Alice, just to have the girl break down again; it was infuriating.  
>"Because she's unstable Lexie. I know she may seem alright around you, but that's because you're the only one she trusts!" The psychiatrist said. She could tell the young woman didn't want to accept how broken Alice was.<br>"She doesn't freak out when Callie talks to her! Or anyone else in the house." Lexie argued back. Alice had grown comfortable around the doctors in the house, and would even carry out small conversations with them.  
>"Okay, maybe I am a bitch! But I've helped a lot of wack-job kids-" Lexie cut the woman off.<br>"Don't call her that." The surgeon said seriously. Jessica raised her eyebrows and decided to calm down.  
>"Look, I know you care about her Lexie. But I promise you, I can help her." Jessica calmed her voice down and gave Lexie a pleading look. The other doctor nodded.<br>"I'm sorry for freaking out. It's just we've worked so, so hard to get to where she is now. You should have seen her before Jess. It was...heartbreaking." Lexie said, running her hands through her hair.  
>"It might be a little hard to get her back here tomorrow." Jessica admitted.<br>"Don't you think we should give her a day off? I mean I don't want her to get too stressed out." Lexie asked uncertainly.  
>"I say bring her back. I'll apologize, try to get on her good side a bit. We'll go slower tomorrow Lexie, I promise." Jessica suggested carefully. Lexie nodded, though reluctant.<br>"Thanks again for this." Lexie said, hugging her friend.  
>"No problem Lex." Jessica replied. The two woman smiled at each other before Lexie left the office.<p>

* * *

><p>"Just visiting, huh?" Callie said as Alice leaned against the counter at the nurses' station, where Callie had stopped to fill out some charts.<p>

"Not now, Callie," Alice said tiredly. Callie glanced up in surprise at her tone. Alice watched Callie's face take on an expression of concern as she took in Alice's tear streaked face and broken haunted expression in her eyes.

"What happened?" She asked.

"Jessica Lewis happened." Alice replied bitterly.

"I'm sure she's trying to help." Callie assured her.

"Help? I fail to see how describing every detail of... that night is going to help me. Look at me Callie. I'm a wreck. An hour and a half ago I had no problem talking to you . And now, my nerves are so shot that every little whisper in my head is telling me to step away and protect myself because I can't trust you not to shove a knife into my stomach." Alice's voice was tortured and Callie was at a loss for words. Lexie's voice from down the hall filled the silence that had fallen between Callie and Alice.

"You ready?" Lexie asked. Alice nodded quickly and immediately walked over beside the doctor. Callie shot Lexie a questioning glance and Lexie mouthed the word "later".  
>Lexie and Alice wasted no time in getting out of the hospital. As they walked out the doors, into the parking lot, Lexie watched as Alice's muscles finally relaxed and she took a deep breath.<br>"I'm not mad at your Lexie." The teenager mumbled as she got into the passenger's seat.  
>"You will be." Lexie's voice trailed off as she started the car. Alice looked up.<br>"What do you mean?" Alice asked almost fearfully. She had an idea to where this was going.  
>"I mean I'm taking you back tomorrow." Lexie admitted as she pulled out of the parking lot.<br>"What?" Alice snapped. Her voice had risen and she now stared at Lexie with wide eyes.  
>"I know you pretty much hate her, but Jessica can help you. She has some...unconventional methods but they work. And she wants to apologize to you too." Lexie quickly told the teenager. Alice's eyebrows rose.<br>"The devil shrink wants to apologize? Well that should be interesting." She said, subtly letting Lexie know that she would go tomorrow. Lexie caught the hint and smiled to herself.  
>"Devil shrink? Really?" The surgeon chuckled, imagining her friend with horns and a tail.<br>"Or Satan Psychologist. Take your pick." Alice smirked. Again, she was using her dry sense of humor to cover up how uncomfortable she was, and Lexie knew it.

A couple minutes later, Lexie pulled the car up next to the curb and shut the engine off. Alice got out of the car without a word, and walked into the house. Lexie followed, concerned.

Alice stepped into the house and kept her eyes cast downward, hoping that the other residents would ignore her. No such luck. "Oh hey, Alice. How'd it go?" Meredith asked as the teen hung her coat.

Alice glanced up, startled by her presence. She struggled unsuccessfully to fight back tears as she stormed up the stairs and out of sight. Her door clicked shut seconds later, but it did little to muffle the sound of her crying.

"What the hell happened?" A confused Meredith asked Lexie. She sighed wearily.

"Jess pushed her, hard. Way too hard. Made her re-live every second of, you know, that night. Damn near pushed her right over the edge. She couldn't even stand to be near Callie." Lexie informed her half-sister grimly.

"Oh, wow. Poor thing." Meredith said, glancing up the staircase.  
>"Yeah, I know. Look, I'm going to start dinner, give her some alone time. Wouldn't surprise me if she fell asleep before then." Lexie said, walking into the kitchen. Her older sister followed.<br>"Well, I'm free for the night. Derek's got a couple surgeries lined up. So I'll help." Meredith volunteered. Lexie smiled at the older woman, temporarily forgetting about the stressed teenager upstairs.

* * *

><p>It didn't take Meredith and Lexie long to fix up dinner, and soon everything was on the table. "Would you mind going up to get her?" Lexie asked, thinking Alice would have recovered by now. Or fell asleep.<br>"Sure." Meredith said, putting the last bowl down on the table. She started towards the staircase.  
>"Alice? Dinner's ready." Meredith said, knocking on the door lightly. It swung open, apparently unlatched, and Meredith's eyes fell on the girl sitting by the window. Slowly, Alice turned to face her.<br>"You coming down?" Meredith asked. Alice shook her head.  
>"Not hungry." The teenager replied almost silently. Her face was sunken in, even more exhausted then Meredith remembered.<br>"Really now? Because the ribs poking out from your chest suggest otherwise. What have you eaten today?" Meredith said, leaning up against the door frame.  
>"Coffee." Alice mumbled.<br>"Sounds healthy. Look, I'm not going to make you eat if you really don't want to. But you have to go down and tell Lexie." Meredith said. Alice groaned and rolled her eyes. But she liked Meredith; the woman seemed gentle, and she was Lexie's sister.  
>"Fine." Alice said, getting up. She walked past Meredith who followed her down to the kitchen.<br>"Hey. I thought you might be asleep." Lexie said as the teenager walked into the kitchen. Alice smiled slightly and shook her head.  
>"I'm not really hungry Lexie. I think I'm just going to go to bed." Alice said, yawning for emphasis. Lexie frowned in concern.<br>"Did you eat anything at the hospital?" She asked carefully.  
>"Nope. In case you haven't noticed, I don't really eat much when I 'break down', as you put it." Alice said, tired of the seemingly endless amount of questions she had been asked today. And with that, she turned and walked out of the kitchen.<p>

_**So this was realllllly long. But that should make up for the bit of a wait we gave you guys. Please review.**_


	21. Chapter 21

Alice rolled over for what seemed like the zillionth time that night. Her nerves were still shot from that damn psychologist, and she knew she wouldn't be able to sleep. So Alice got up, stretched, and went to her window. She quietly opened it, letting the cold air flow into her bedroom. She went quietly opened her top dresser drawer and pulled out a pack of cigarettes. She listened for any signs that someone might be awake, heard none, and shut the drawer silently.

Alice sat down by the window and pulled out a Newport and her lighter. She leaned towards the open window and lit the cigarette, taking in the first drag, which was always the worst. She let the smoke drift out of her mouth and sighed. Alice had honestly tried to quit before, for Lexie. But she needed calmed down, and the Nicotine cravings weren't really helping.

Alice took her time, but eventually the cigarette was burned down to the filter. She leaned out of the window, put it out, and then hurled the butt into the street.

Still finding herself wide awake and restless, Alice shut the window and turned around. She sprayed a bit of body spritz on to cover up the smoke and then crept out of her room. Wandering around the dark house, she soon found herself staring at the booze cabinet.

The temptation was SO strong. Alice knew Lexie was asleep upstairs. And Alice knew if she drank, she could sleep. Well technically, pass out. And she hadn't gotten drunk in such a long time. Oooh, and if she had a hangover tomorrow, she could say she had the flu and not have to go back to the devil shrink.

"Thinking about it?" Alice nearly screamed when she heard the soft voice. Whirling around, she came face to face with Meredith. Shit, now she was in for it. It probably looked a little incrimination; staring at the liquor cabinet at three in the morning.

"Just go get Lexie already, I know you're going to." She snarled, immediately putting up her defensive attitude.

"Are you going to Dr. Lewis's tomorrow?" Meredith asked, seemingly out of the blue. Alice raised an eyebrow.

"No, I'm not really feeling it." The teenager replied irritably. Meredith smirked.

"You are now." The older of the two said. Alice tilted her head to the side.

"What the hell are you talking about?" The teenager demanded.  
>"You go tomorrow, I won't tell Lexie. Deal?" Meredith replied. Alice sighed, defeated.<p>

"Fine." Alice groaned.

"Well, that's enough of this. Let's go back upstairs." Meredith turned for the staircase.

"Uhm, you can do what you'd like. I'm not tired, so I'm not coming up." Alice's tone dripped with sass even in her whisper.

"I'm not leaving you down here. As soon as I go up you'll be into that cupboard, and that's not happening." Meredith insisted. That was only half the reason though. The stubborn girl's insecurity was obvious, but she was too tenacious to admit it, so keeping her company would help put her mind at ease even if she didn't want to ask for it.

Alice glared at her through the darkness and placed a hand on her hip. "I'm not coming up." She repeated.

Meredith sighed in disproval. "Alice, you can't drink your problems away. I know you're anxious around me but let me help you." Alice sighed heavily.

"I don't want your help." She insisted.

"Stop being so stubborn. I can't trust you to come up on your own." Meredith replied.

"I can't sleep, Meredith. My nerves are shot. Every time I shut my eyes. I see him. So please. Please, let me have this escape. It's wrong, I know. But I'm not sure how much I can handle if I don't do something."

Alice paced back and forth in front of the cabinet. Meredith sighed and placed her arm on the teenager to stop her pacing.

"Just try, Alice." The older Grey said gently. "

C'mon, I'll stay with you till you fall asleep." She pulled the reluctant teen towards the staircase.

"I'm not two. I don't need you to stay with me, Meredith." Alice said in an exasperated tone, trying desperately to cover up her desire to not be alone but not wanting to reach out and ask for comfort.

Meredith hid a smile; she was two steps ahead of the teen's mind games. "No arguments I'm staying." She sat down on the corner of Alice's bed.

"Uh, do you mind?" Alice snapped.

"No, not at all actually." Meredith grinned and made no attempts to move.

Alice glared at the older woman, but gave up. She laid down and buried her face into the pillow.

After a couple minutes of silence, she spoke. "It's not working."

"That's because you're talking instead of trying to sleep." Meredith replied simply. She heard Alice give an annoyed sigh and then sit up again.

"Do I really have to go back tomorrow?" She said, softening her glare to look more innocent.

"It's either that, or an incredibly long, disappointed speech from Lexie, while she looks at you with those big, sad, Bambi eyes-" Alice cut the older woman off.

"Alright, alright." She snapped. Meredith smiled warmly.

"Jessica can help you Alice. She's very good." The surgeon told the teenager, who rolled her eyes.

"That's what everyone keeps saying. Didn't seem that way today." Alice's tone had weakened some as she recalled the psychologists spot on "guesses".

"You know, I used to be really dark and twisty inside. People called me 'dark and twisty Meredith'. But sometimes it does help to talk about things." Meredith said. Alice raised her eyebrows, and fell back onto the pillow again.

"The more I talk, the more it hurts." Alice confessed , propping herself up on her elbows. "The less that I have to relive that the better." "And that's why you should talk to Jessica. She knows how to help it hurt less. That's her job. My job, I fix the physical pain. She fixes the mental pain. If you are willing to let Lexie, Callie, Arizona, and even me help you with your injuries, why are you so against getting help for the stuff that we can't fix with stitches and bandages? It's just as important." Meredith said quietly. Alice sighed but didn't respond.

"Just go to bed, Meredith." She said in tired tone.

"Nope. Not leaving till you're asleep." She replied. Alice lay awake for another hour before sleep finally overcame her.

* * *

><p>"Mer, get up!" Cristina Yang stormed over to the bed. Alice's eyes snapped open and she leapt up, scrambling back with a terrified yelp.<p>

"Cristina, what the hell?" An irritated Meredith sat up and glanced over at the now trembling teen.

"Sorry, Alice. Mer, get moving. There's a staff meeting in like half an hour." She glanced at her watch. Lexie appeared at the doorway and took in the commotion. She stepped in and moved towards Alice who was curled up in a ball, her scared eyes staring past at nothing.

"Cristina, what the fuck have you done?" Lexie snapped at the resident as she brushed past her and went to Alice. "Alice, hun it's okay! No one is here to hurt you." She assured her, keeping her tone soothing. If Alice heard her she didn't show it. "Alice?" Lexie reached out and gently brushed her arm. That got a reaction. Alice scrambled back fearfully. She misjudged the distance between the bed and the wall and smacked her head on the headboard, hard. "Ow!" She yelped.

"It's alright Alice. You're fine." Lexie said. Alice quickly broke out of her trance at the sound of the surgeons voice. Dread filled her head as she remembered that she had to go back to Jessica.  
>"Alright, how much am I going to have to fight you to get you to go today?" Lexie asked tiredly. Alice glanced at Meredith, who raised a knowing eyebrow and smirked.<p>

"It's fine Lexie, I'll go." Alice said begrudgingly, shooting Meredith a dirty look. The older Grey laughed as she got up from the bed and followed an impatient Christina out of the girl's bedroom.

"Why was Meredith in your room?" Lexie asked curiously.

"What? I can't have sleepovers?" Alice said, standing up and cracking her back. Out of the corner of her eye, she suddenly caught sight of her cigarette carton, which was still on the windowsill. A small burst of panic hit her in the stomach.

Lexie stared at Alice suspiciously, but dropped the subject. "Alright, we're leaving in like, 25 minutes. I'll see you downstairs." She said, turning and exiting the room. Alice breathed a sigh of relief and then scrambled to hide the cigarettes again.

Alice took around 20 minutes to get ready for the day. She straightened her hair, dressed in a flannel with a tank top under it and black skinny jeans, and put on a bit of eye make-up. Fear was building up in her stomach as the minutes ticked away until she would have to face the psychologist again.

Eventually, she came downstairs and was met by Lexie nearly whipping a banana at her. Alice barely caught it and then gave Lexie a confused look.

"Eat it. You drank coffee for breakfast and didn't eat lunch or dinner yesterday. So you're eating the banana." Lexie said, taking on a tone of authority in her voice. Alice sighed, but brought the banana with her as she followed the surgeon out the door.

* * *

><p>Alice sat in the passenger seat and fiddled the banana around in her hands. "Eat it." Lexie said firmly. Alice placed it on her lap.<p>

"If I eat right now, I will most definitely puke." She replied. She chewed on her lip as she glanced out the window. Nerves bundled in her stomach as she realized that they were only 30 seconds from the dreaded hospital.

"I'm warning Jess that you haven't eaten today, she'll make you have something. Trust me, she does not want to have to come hunting for me today because you passed out from lack of food." Lexie turned into the Seattle Grace parking lot.

Alice forced herself to step out of the now parked car. She paced back and forth nervously.

"C'mon, it'll be alright. I've only got one surgery scheduled for today, the rest is just catch up on paperwork, so we won't have to be here for too long today." Lexie reassured the nervous girl.

Alice found herself shaking as she walked through the doors into the hospital. She paid much more attention to where she was going this time, though it only led to more tension building in her stomach.

The elevator dinged and Alice had to force herself to step out. Lexie kept a gentle hand on her back and guided her to the office.

"Lexie, I don't know about this." Alice said, finally giving into the fear welling in her stomach. She didn't care if Meredith told Lexie about last night anymore. She just wanted to get away from the goddamn psychologist from hell.

"Look, she promised to take it a lot slower today. She wants to help you Alice." The surgeon said, knocking on the office door. Alice pursed her lips and winced as the door opened.

Jessica stepped out of the office. Alice instinctively shifted closer to Lexie, an unconscious seek of comfort. Lexie put her arm around her and squeezed her shoulder, offering a small smile.

"Good morning Lexie, Alice." Jessica broke the tense silence and smiled.

"Morning Jess." Lexie replied. Alice said nothing and kept her eyes averted. Normally she would have been on the offensive and glared challengingly, but today she was so nervous and fearful that she simply couldn't keep up that act.

"Come in, Alice." Jessica said. Panic flared up in her. She turned her back to Jessica.

"Please Lexie, don't do this to me." She said in a broken whisper. Tears welled in her eyes and she quickly wiped them away in attempts to preserve her makeup. Lexie's features were anguished as she looked into Alice's eyes for a moment and then turned around and walked down the hall, leaving Alice no choice but to stay with Jessica. Alice stood in place, completely stunned.

_It's for her own good, she needs this help, _Lexie kept reminding herself.

* * *

><p>Alice couldn't believe it. Lexie had just...left her there. She watched the woman go, hoping that she would turn back, or something. But Lexie kept walking until she reached the end of the hall, then turned and disappeared.<p>

"Alice?" Jessica asked softly, breaking the girl's gaze away from the end of the hall. Alice flinched a bit, startled, but then turned around slowly to face her.

"She's doing this for your benefit, Alice. You may not believe it now, but it's true." She spoke up.

"No. You don't get to tell me exactly what Lexie's thinking. You don't have any right to try and tell me what is best for me-" Alice's voice started to rise. A nurse down the hall shot her a dirty look. Jessica motioned for her office and Alice dragged herself in. She slammed the door shut. As soon as she was in the office she picked up her nervous habit of pacing.

Jessica simply sat down and watched her. Finally, Alice grew tired of pacing and she sat down. "I have been a nervous wreck for the past twenty four hours. I haven't been able to sleep or eat, and the slightest thing startles me. And why is this? Because of you. I was getting better, and you had to go and bring back flashbacks of… that night. I'm exhausted, and scared, and I feel weak. There is _nothing_ that I hate more than being weak. And this is all because of you. _You did this to me_, and I damn well had better hear an apology." By the time she finished, her voice had raised to a near shout.

"Alice, I am sorry for yesterday. I shouldn't have pushed that hard." Jessica replied. Alice searched her face for any sign of insincerity, though she couldn't find any. Jessica looked sincere, even a little guilty.

"So, because I basically asked you a gazillion questions yesterday, you can ask me anything you want." Alice raised her eyebrows at the psychologist's proposition.

"Alright. How do you know Lexie so well?" Alice started out, crossing her arms in front of her and settling into the chair.

"I went to med school with her. But I opted for psychology. We were roomies." Jessica explained. Alice nodded.

"What makes you think you can help me?" Alice asked next. She arched an eyebrow and waited for the doctor's answer.

"Because Alice, nobody is a lost cause." Jessica replied simply.

"I think you're gonna need to re-consider that, Dr. Lewis. You don't know my story, not all of it anyways. Don't assume that I can be helped, because chances are I can't." Alice's tone was calm and detached.

"Lexie doesn't seem to think that." The older woman shot back.

"Lexie is naive." The teenager pressed her lips together and glanced around the room. It was apparent that she didn't want to continue talking to the therapist. The girl's actions of shutting down were not unnoticed.

"I have a question for you." Jessica spoke up. Alice shot her a sour look. Jessica ignored it and continued. "After that night, how are you with physical contact?" She asked.

"I'm fine." Alice spat out bitterly.

"Really?" Jessica stood up and walked over to the loveseat where Alice sat. She perched on the other side of the couch. Alice stiffened, and she could feel her heart pounding in her chest.

"So, you're fine with this." Jessica slid over until there was only a few inches between her and Alice. Alice froze. "And this too?" Jessica reached out and gently trailed her fingers along the teenager's arm, lightly tracing a pattern. Alice locked her jaw but remained silent.

"Then again, that was never your poison," Jessica stood up abruptly and reached for the medical records on her desk. "Multiple lacerations, mostly concentrated on the abdomen." She read to herself. She traded the files for her ever present book. The psychologist walked back over to the couch and set the book and pen down on the little table.

"Lie down." She instructed. "Are you nuts? I'm not doing that. This is a psych appointment, not a physical exam." Alice replied icily. Her tone gave off nonchalance, but Jessica watched her eyes flit nervously around as she glanced around. "If you're truly ok like you say you are with physical contact, this won't be an issue." Jessica paused. "Hmm, looks like I was right about the physical issues..." She reached for her book. Alice sighed loudly and slowly shifted her position until she was stretched out on the couch. "There, happy?" She asked in an irritated tone as she started to sit up.

"Nu uh, stay like that," The therapist walked back to the couch and sat on the edge of empty space. "Majority of the injuries concentrated on the abdomen, which obviously had to be treated if it was recorded. So, you shouldn't have an issue with this." Jessica mused.

Alice watched in mute horror as Jessica reached over and slid her hands under Alice's tee, slowly sliding it up to reveal the pattern of scars. Alice shuddered as her fingertips trailed over her skin. "Or this," Jessica gently placed her hand on the flat plane of Alice's stomach. She watched as Alice's breathing quickened. Alice's fear had nearly consumed her as she fought against the flashbacks, but she refused to let herself break down and give devil shrink the upper hand. She willed herself not to flinch. Jessica curiously traced the pattern of scars. Her touch was light and entirely harmless, but the action was too much like her father's. The flood of memories that had threatened to overtake her won over and panic consumed her entirely.

"Stop." Alice gasped. "Please, please just stop." She begged quietly, unable to bring herself to move away. Jess nodded and tugged her shirt back down before pulling her hand away.

"Fair enough." The doctor said. She offered Alice a hand and helped her sit up. "What's happening right now? What are you remembering?" She asked gently.

"Him." Alice gasped out. "I know it's not him but it's all I can see and _feel_. I'm.. I'm trapped, and he's cutting me and I can't stop it." She choked out.

"But Alice, no one's hurting you. He's gone and he can't hurt you anymore. Every time you get these flashbacks, you need to tell yourself that." Jessica said, writing down what the girl had said in her notebook.

"I know that. But still, the memories hurt." Alice said, realizing that she was opening up to the woman, but not really caring anymore. The flashbacks were still fading away.

"But that's all they are; memories." Jessica told the teenager.

"Look, I know that it probably won't happen...but he could come back. It's not like he's dead or anything." Alice admitted.

Jessica noticed the slight change in Alice as she said 'dead'. Her eyes had dangerous glint, and her tone changed to a disturbing fascination. "Alice," she said slowly "do you want him to die?" She asked.

"If someone did the same thing to you, would you want them dead? I'm not saying I'd be the one to kill him, but if he was dead, I wouldn't have a problem with it. And now, the devil shrink calls for the big guy in white to come take me to one of those padded rooms, right?" Alice's tone had turned cold again.

Jessica smirked. "No, you'll have to wait until next week. All of our padded rooms are taken." She replied sarcastically. Alice stifled a laugh, but soon returned to being serious.

"Do you ever tell Lexie about any of these fears?" Jessica continued, her pen making light etching sounds in her notebook.

"Not really. I mean, she knows when I have breakdowns, considering it's kind of obvious." Alice said, finally feeling her heart rate return to normal.

"What about Callie? I understand you two are kind of close?" Jessica continued, glad she was finally getting somewhere. Boy was Lexie going to be surprised.

"No. In case you haven't noticed, I'm not the type to go around spreading my feelings all over the place." Once again, Alice's tone resumed its sarcastic, snarky tone.

"Oh, I've noticed. How about for a change, you tell me about when you and Lexie first met?" Jessica said. Just because the shooting was before she got dumped at the hospital, didn't mean she wasn't still traumatized by that too.

"What's there to tell? I was in for a couple broken ribs when I walked out into the hallway. Saw him take down a doctor, and then he turned around and shot me." Alice said. Her tone almost sounded bored.

"And then?" Jessica prodded.

"And then Lexie showed up, pulled the bullet out, and got me out of there." Alice finished.

"I heard that you saved Lexie's life." Jessica said. Alice sighed.

"I talked the guy out of shooting her, yeah." She admitted.

"Sounds pretty brave to me." Jessica said, looking up from her notebook.

"I was already shot. There wasn't much more to be afraid of." Alice replied simply.

"Do you still get flashbacks from the shooting?" Jessica asked next, looking back down at the notebook.

"Not really. If I heard a gunshot, then I probably would." Alice told the woman. She was growing bored of the questions.

"Really? No flashbacks at all?" She was skeptical.

"No. Being shot by a random and having a decent chance at survival tends to pale in comparison to being cut up and tortured and believing that you are truly going to die at the hands of your father with your mother as the witness." Alice shuddered.

Alice shifted restlessly. "Can we be done? I can't take much more today." She stood up and paced around the office.

"Yeah, we can take a break. Come on, we'll go for a walk." Jessica said, rising from her chair. Alice followed and stood up. She nearly fell back into the chair as her vision began to swim. _Must have stood up too fast,_ she told herself.

Alice followed Jessica out into the hallway and was glad to get out of that damn office. She still didn't feel right though. Everything seemed to be moving slower and it was hard to focus on things. She kind of felt nauseous as well. Figuring it had something to do with the stress, she kept quiet as she walked along side Jessica.

"Do you want to go see if Lexie's out of surgery?" Jessica asked, leading her patient through the halls. Alice shook her head, still upset from the fact Lexie had simply left her that morning.

"Alright...do you want to go see Callie then?" The doctor suggested. Alice nodded, though there wasn't much enthusiasm, and followed Jessica to the elevator.

Jessica hit the button for the 5th floor, where the Ortho wing was. Alice leaned against the back of the elevator to keep herself upright. Jessica frowned. "Are you alright?" She asked. Alice nodded briefly. Jessica dropped the subject, figuring that Alice simply wanted some space and to keep to herself. The elevator dinged and they stepped off into the quiet hall.

Alice's vision was even more blurred and she felt severely light headed. She stopped in her tracks. "Jessica-" she called out. Jessica turned around just in time to see Alice start to collapse. She rushed forward and caught the girl before she hit her head. "Hey!" She called out to one of the nurses who hurried over.

"Go get Dr. Torres please." Jessica instructed. Alice groaned and stirred before opening her eyes. "Can you tell me what happened?" Jessica asked the pale teenager.

"Well I obviously passed out." Alice said weakly, struggling to sit up.

"I see your sarcasm wasn't damaged. Don't get up get, you'll probably fall right back down." Jessica told the girl, who insisted on at least propping herself up on her elbows.

"I should have had that damn banana, that's what happened." Alice continued.

"Um, what?" Jessica glanced at the girl, wondering if she should be evaluating for mental instability rather than PTSD.

"Lexie gave me a banana this morning. I didn't eat it." Alice elaborated.

"Ahh. How long has it been since you've had anything to eat?" Jessica asked. Alice pulled out of Jessica's grasp and sat up.

"Too long." She replied coldly, her defensive and bitchy attitude instantly back. She caught sight of Callie who was walking briskly down the hall. "Great, you just had to get her." The exasperated teen shot a glare at Jessica.

"Hey, what happened?" Callie asked Alice.

"Nothing. I skipped breakfast. It caught up to me." She replied. Callie raised an eyebrow and glanced at her watch.

"It's 9 in the morning. A few hours without food won't make you pass out. How long has it been since you've eaten?" Callie locked eyes with Alice.

"Hmm.." She replied noncommittally.

"Alice, I'm serious. Answer my question." Callie said firmly. Alice paused, thinking back to the last time she had eaten. She skipped dinner from two nights as well, making it 36 hours since she had eaten anything, however eating something and having an actual meal were two different things to Alice. She couldn't remember the last time she had eaten a full serving. "Thirty six hours. But I haven't had a real meal in a lot longer than that." She admitted. She glanced at Jess. "Oh better hurry and add that to the list of Psycho Alice's Problems." She stood up, fishing in her pocket for her wallet.

Alice stumbled a bit, still dizzy from her blood sugar being so low. Callie placed a gentle hand on her back for support and Jessica couldn't help but notice the girl flinch a bit.

* * *

><p>Eventually, the trio made their way to the cafeteria, where Alice finally ate a bowl of fruit salad. Though she knew she needed to eat, she still wasn't hungry. Although after finishing, she did feel a lot better.<br>"Ready to go back?" Jessica asked after Alice threw her empty bowl away. The teenager nodded reluctantly and gave Callie a parting glance.  
>Jessica and Alice walked back to the psychologist's office in silence. Jessica still kept a watchful eye on the girl, until they were safely in the office with the door closed.<p>

"Feeling better?" Jessica asked, taking her notebook and pen off of the desk and then sitting down in her chair. Alice nodded and sat back down on the love-seat.  
>"Good. Let's pick up where we left off. Why didn't you ever go for help about your parents?" Jessica asked, clicking her pen. Alice sighed.<br>"It was never that bad before. Like a few hits here, getting pushed down the stairs. But it was never life threatening." Alice explained. Jessica nodded.  
>"So you were used to it?" The psychologist asked. Alice hesitated before nodding. Just then, the door burst open, with Lexie behind it looking absolutely exasperated.<br>"Alice, I heard you fainted. Why didn't one of you call me?" She demanded, out of breath. It was obvious she had sprinted to the office.

Alice stared at her for a moment. Jess kept quiet, letting Alice handle this as she pleased. "Get out." She said quietly.

"What?" Lexie asked in disbelief.

"You heard me. Right now I'd rather be stuck in this hell hole then see you. It was obvious by the way that you left this morning that you had a lot to do. So I got Callie. I'm fine, so don't get bent out of shape over this. Now leave." Alice glared at the young surgeon.  
>Jun 16th<p>

Lexie glanced at Jessica in disbelief. "You heard the patient's request. We'll see you in an hour Lexie." Jessica said firmly. Lexie shook her head and turned around, shutting the door on the way out.


	22. Chapter 22

"Okay, I know you're pretty fed up of talking, I understand. But what, just what was that?" Jessica looked genuinely surprised.

"As you can guess I didn't want to come back. Mostly due to fear," she gave Jess a hard glance before continuing "and she just left me. So yeah, I'm a little ticked."

"So you allow a disagreement to get in the way of her concern for your health?" Jessica asked.

"Lexie can tell you how hard it was to earn my trust. She fully knew that abandoning me like that would have its repercussions." The therapist nodded.

"Alright." Jessica said, writing in her book.

"Now, I'm so over this. I'm way past my tolerance limit for the day. This needs to be done." Alice repeated her earlier complaints.

"You've still got close to an hour, Alice." Jessica reminded her.

"So, I'll go with Callie." Alice said, shrugging.

"Fine, I'll call her." Jessica said, getting up and walking over to her desk. After several moments of silence, it was apparent that someone picked up on the other line.

"Yeah she's fine. Actually, she has about an hour before Lexie's coming back to get her. Can she hang out with you?" Jessica paused for the answer, then looked at Alice and nodded. "Great, thanks. I'll send her over in a couple minutes." Jessica said, hanging up the phone.

"So I'm good?" Alice asked, getting up from the couch. Jessica nodded.

The teenager was half out the door when she paused. "Hey, um, thanks for not giving me a mental breakdown today." Behind the sarcasm of the comment, Jessica could tell it was a playful tease. She grinned, happy that Alice was seemingly warming up to her.

"No problem. It's a lot easier when you're mentally stable." She replied. Alice smirked before walking the rest of the way out the door and closing it behind her.

Taking her time, Alice strolled leisurely through the now familiar hospital halls. She came to the elevator eventually, and pressed the button. When it finally arrived, the doors opened to reveal no other than Mark Sloan.

Alice gaped for a moment, cursing her awful luck. She glanced at him, frantically thinking over her options. "Uhh forgot my wallet. Don't hold the door." She mumbled and spun around, walking briskly down the hall.

Alice waited until her heart rate returned to normal before pressing the button again. She waited in anticipation for the elevator doors to open, and was relieved to find that the only people in this one were Meredith and Dr. Shepard. They both smiled warmly at her, and she stepped inside, the doors sliding closed behind her.

"Where's Jessica?" Meredith asked curiously, raising an eyebrow. Alice rolled her eyes.

"She let me go early today. I'm going to hang out with Callie." The teenager replied quickly. Meredith nodded, pleased that she had kept up her part of the deal.

"So, enough about my day. How was yours?" Alice said, asking the questions for once.

"She got barfed on. Twice." Derek cut in, chuckling. Meredith shot him a dirty look as Alice snickered beside them. The door opened on Alice's floor and she gave the two doctors a small smile before stepping out onto the ortho floor.

"Hey, I heard you did really well today." Callie said as Alice stepped out of the elevator. She rolled her eyes.

"You totally made me sound like a six year old on the first day of kindergarten." The teenager replied. Callie chuckled and then motioned for her to follow her down the hall.

"So you and Jessica are getting along better?" Callie asked as she stepped into an empty exam room. Alice followed and smirked.

"Yeah, I guess. She acted like an actual human being today, so that was nice." Alice replied, hopping up on one of the exam tables and stretching out comfortably.

"I heard you told of Lexie after you got back from fainting." Callie said, starting to fill out a couple of charts.

"Yeah. She just left me there this morning." Alice shrugged. Callie frowned.

"Well aren't you kind of glad she did? I mean, Jessica seems to be good for you, right?" Callie asked, hoping to get Alice to let go of the hostility she seemed to be holding towards Lexie.

"That's not the point. I still would have gone. But Lexie knew I was on edge since yesterday and she knows I have abandonment issues, and that's exactly what she did." Alice said, her voice getting slightly louder.

"So what, you're just going to give her the cold shoulder?" Callie replied sarcastically.

"Maybe. What do you suggest, Ms. 'I-Know-Everything-Cause-I'm-A-Surgeon?" Alice asked, laughing as Callie rolled her eyes.

"Ms. 'I-Know-Everything-Cause-I'm-A-Surgeon suggests that you cut her a break. You're a pain in the ass when you're in a mood, can you blame her for wanting to get out of dodge?" Callie asked as she bent over her charts. Alice grumbled, and sat in silence for a few minutes while Callie did her work. A pair of footsteps sounded down the hall. Alice glanced up. It was Lexie. "You're done early." Callie said in a surprised tone.

"Yeah. Um, Alice, are you ready to go?" Lexie asked almost nervously. Alice hadn't so much as glanced at her since she had appeared in the doorway. Instead, she looked up at Callie, who gave her a look that screamed 'go or I'll rip your hair out'. Returning the glare, Alice sighed and forced herself to look at Lexie and nod. She followed the surgeon out of the room.

Alice and Lexie walked in silence towards the exit of the hospital. The younger of the two walked behind the other, keeping her head down and jaw locked in silence. It wasn't until they got into the car that Alice spoke.

"I was scared. And you just left me. Lexie, you know me; you know I have abandonment issues. I'm not mad, it's just...you can't do that to me." Alice finally said. Lexie looked over at her in surprise. Alice had admitted to having problems in a non-hysterical way. Was this...progress?

"I'm sorry Alice. It was really hard for me to do that, but I thought it was best for you. So again, I'm sorry." The surgeon apologized.

Alice shrugged. "Yeah, well it wasn't." She said quietly as she looked into her purse for some gum. Her eyes fell on a half empty pack of Marlboros. She sighed longingly. The smoke that she had last night wasn't doing her cravings any favors now. She pulled one out and popped one in her mouth. Lexie glanced over at the sudden movement. Her head turned back to the road. It took her a split second to register what it was, and she turned back with a glare. "What the hell do you think you're doing with that?" She snapped.

"Eyes on the road, Lex. Not lighting it anyways." She mumbled. Lexie shook her head in disbelief but had no choice but to focus on driving. As soon as the car was shut off in the driveway, she reached into Alice's purse and swiped the pack out of it.

"Hey!" Alice protested.

"Like hell am I going to chance a semi depressed, not mentally stable teen with a history of drugs and alcohol around a pack of these cancer sticks." She walked to the end of the driveway, where the garbage was conveniently waiting to be picked up. She popped open the lid and dumped the cigarettes in. "Here, a souvenir." Lexie tossed the empty box at her and headed for the house.

Alice stared at the surgeon in shock. Was that all she was in Lexie's eyes? A semi-depressed, mentally unstable teen? Sighing, she noticed a couple of the cigarettes didn't make it into the trashcan. Alice glanced around before picking them up and putting them in the empty carton Lexie had thrown at her.

Having nothing to lose, Alice sat down on the curb and lit the cigarette that still hung out of her mouth. She took a long drag and felt her nicotine cravings finally subside. She didn't care if Lexie was to walk out again. Seemed like the surgeon was only going to yell at her anyway.

A couple of minutes later, Alice walked into the house. She shut the door behind her quietly and then started towards the stairs. Lexie was waiting for her at the top.

"Really Alice? You just had to smoke one, didn't you?" She said in a disappointed, almost irritated tone. Alice sighed but didn't reply. She simply slid her way past Lexie and went to her room.

* * *

><p>Alice was hoping to have the evening to herself, but there was no such luck. She spent half an hour, the same sentence on loop in her head, staring at her ceiling while lying on the bed. Could she really be nothing more than a burden to Lexie? Her thoughts were interrupted when the door swung open.<p>

Callie walked in with a determined look on her face and a bowl in her hands. She set it down on the desk. "Eat." She instructed.

"Nope." Alice replied simply. She wasn't in the mood for this, and she had zero appetite.

"I'm not leaving until this has been consumed." Callie sat down on the bed.

"Well, it's a good thing you took a seat then 'cause you're gonna be here for a long while." Alice challenged right back.

"Alice, eat the goddamn soup!" Callie ordered harshly. Alice flinched. Great, now Callie was yelling at her too.

"The semi depressed mentally unstable teenager does not want her soup. So please, just leave." Alice's voice broke into a weak plea, and even cracked at the end. Callie noticed the girl's sad disposition and decided to lighten up.

"What's been eating you kid? I mean, other than the usual." She asked, putting a gentle hand on Alice's back. To her surprise, she didn't flinch, possibly from progress, or the girl was simply too tired.

"I think...I think Lexie doesn't want me anymore. And who could blame her?" Alice admitted quietly. Her eyes were fixed on the bowl of soup and just the thought of eating it made her stomach churn in reply.

Callie's eyes widened. "Why on earth would you think that?" She asked.

"Because I'm too goddamn broken. Jessica can try all she wants and she can make it look ok on the surface but there's no helping me Callie." She brushed tears out of her eyes.

"That's not true, you know it. You can't let him win this. You can get better, I promise. And Lexie most definitely wants you, don't even think that she doesn't. She knows that it's gonna take time. She knows that it's not easy. But I swear there is no part of her that doesn't want you anymore." Callie told the upset teenager.

"How do you know Callie? All I do is mess things up for her. She can't bring her boyfriend around because I freak out around him. She can't trust me not to smoke or drink or some shit like that. She has to come running during work to make sure I'm okay because I passed out. I fuck everything up for her." Alice ranted, more tears forming in her eyes.

"Alice, Lexie loves you. And when you two are good, you're great. But you're going through a rough time right now and it's going to be hard for the both of you. You just have to stick it out and wait for the better to come." Callie told the upset teenager. Alice shrugged and bit her lip.

"So I seriously can't get you to eat the soup?" Callie raised am eyebrow and gestured towards the bowl.

"No, I'll eat a piece of fruit or something though. I've always hated soup." Alice said, standing up and taking the bowl with her. She walked somewhat reluctantly towards the door and Callie followed her the whole way down to the kitchen.

"Hey." Alice was greeted by both Derek and Meredith when she walked into the kitchen. She smiled at the couple before dumping her soup out and putting the bowl in the sink. Callie had taken a seat next to Meredith, and now the three doctors were indulged in talk about surgery. Alice looked around for something she knew her stomach could handle. She finally settled on crackers and a banana. Taking the small "meal" she sat down beside Callie, just as Lexie walked into the room.

"Well, we've got a date. See you all tomorrow." Derek said, sensing the tension in the room. Meredith gave Alice a comforting smile before following the man out of the house.

"I've got to run too." Callie said, getting up as well. Alice shot her a look for leaving her alone with Lexie, but said nothing. The surgeon hurried out of the house, leaving Alice and Lexie in a tense silence.

"Anything else you want to yell at me about?" Alice asked as she nibbled on a cracker.

"It would take all night if I yelled about everything I wanted to." Lexie replied dryly. Alice raised her eyebrows, but kept how much the statement had hurt hidden.

"How about you go annoy your boyfriend with your passive aggressive comments?" Alice said calmly. She had forced herself to eat a couple of the crackers, and had to admit that the queasy feeling was going away.

"Would you just quit acting so badass for once? You act _so_ tough, but the frequent breakdowns suggest otherwise." Lexie snapped, slamming her hand down on the counter. Alice flinched and bit her cheek to keep from saying anything else.

"Why don't you just ship me off to some foster home already?" Alice said, standing up and heading towards the door. Lexie followed after her.

"Alice, you know I'd never do that." Lexie's voice had softened. Alice didn't look up from her bent over position of tying her shoes. The teenager didn't reply.

"I'm going for a run." Alice said and she stepped onto the porch. She slammed the door before Lexie could reply. A few blocks away, she noticed that a car was following her. She sped up a bit, and so did the vehicle. It soon matched her pace. She was considering her options when the window rolled down. "Alice!" The voice from the car made her stop dead. It was her mother.

"Alice, I'm so sorry. I did a horrible thing those months back, and I want you to know that I have changed. No more alcohol, on doctor prescribed meds for my moods, and I've left your father. I know this isn't easy to wrap your head around, but honey I want you to come live with me again. See that I have changed. Come live with your real mom." Her voice was so compelling, and Alice realized with surprise that she wanted nothing more than for all of this to be true.

She stepped towards the car. "Prove it." She finally said. Her mom beamed. "That's my girl. C'mon, I'll show you my new apartment. It's not fancy, but it's fine for now." Alice sat down in the car, wondering if this is all a huge mistake. Her mom chatted animatedly at her. Alice gave non-committal answers in reply. They drove for about ten minutes, before her mom stopped in front of a small building. It was inconspicuous and as her mom mentioned nothing fancy.

Alice followed her mom inside the doors, and up the three flights of stairs. "Sorry, elevator is down today." Her mom's tone was apologetic.

"Whatever." Alice mumbled. They stopped in front of a door and her mom fumbled for her keys. "After you." Her mom smiled at her. Alice stepped in hesitantly, and took in her surroundings. She noticed the TV was on, and she was about to comment when a whopping force hit her from behind and knocked her out cold.

_**So this is a lot shorter this time. But it seemed like a very suspenseful place to stop ahaha! The more reviews you guys leave, the faster we'll update . Thanks!**_


	23. Chapter 23

It had been an hour and a half since Alice had left. Lexie had tried the girl's cellphone 8 times. She had also called Callie and Arizona to see if maybe Alice had called either of them to pick her up. Neither of them had heard from her, but were coming over to Lexie's. She had also called Mark, who was scanning the streets on his way over.

"It's all my fault." Lexie sobbed. She had tried Alice's phone 6 more times, and again gotten no answer. Another hour had passed. Mark held her close and whispered comfortingly into her ear. "She'll come home Lex." He said, rubbing her back.

"B-but what if something happened to her? What if she decided to run away?" Lexie cried, wiping away at the free falling tears.

"She's alright Lexie. She has to be." Arizona piped up. Callie nodded in agreement.

"Somebody should call Jessica." Lexie said. Not wanting to argue with or upset the woman, Callie immediately pulled out her phone and dialed the doctor's number.

* * *

><p>Alice woke to the feeling of being kicked in the side. "You stupid bitch, you thought you'd nearly frame us for assault and get away with it. Think again." Her father sneered at her as he delivered countless blows to the frail teen. The vase that her mom had hit her with was shattered where she lay. She felt shards of it embedded in her skin, each one burning like a flame licking at her skin. The violence continued, for hours this time, with both of them beating on her.<p>

Alice knew she was going to die, and she had no one to blame but herself for being so damn easily tricked. Her vision slipped and the pain blurred with the threatening darkness of unconsciousness.

It wasn't until she hit cold pavement did she realize that she had survived. They had left her alive, barely, but dumped her somewhere again. Alice was not conscious enough to recognize her surroundings. She was immobile on the ground as she slipped in and out of consciousness. Her only hope was that someone would find her soon enough.

As time wore on, the extreme cold in the air started to be a kind of pain reliever. Alice's mind started to drift to Lexie. She didn't even tell her goodbye, just hurried out of the house. She wondered what the surgeon was doing now, and if she was looking for her. She would look for her, right?

Alice struggled to open her eyes more than the crack the remained at, but the swelling on her face was too much. She summoned all of her strength and attempted to lift herself up. Alice barely got a couple inches off of the ground before the pain made her collapse. The collision of her crushed ribs to the pavement earned a pathetic whimper. Giving up, Alice let herself fall into the impending unconsciousness.

* * *

><p>Seven hours passed. Alice had still not returned. The small search party had all crashed at the residents' house, trying to get a few hours of unrestful sleep in before a day at the hospital. Arizona was the first one to drag herself out of bed. She stumbled down the stairs and put a pot of coffee on before heading to the door to see if they had gotten a paper this morning. Her brain took a few seconds to register the sight before her. "Oh god. Oh god, oh god, Alice. Alice!" The blonde paeds surgeon knelt to the ground beside Alice's still form. To her relief, she still had a pulse, albeit weak. "Callie! Callie get out here right now!" She called frantically into the house. There were a rush of footsteps and an out of breath Callie appeared at the door "Wha-" she broke off as she saw Alice.<p>

"Quickly help me assess her injuries before we move her." The Latina went into her doctor frame of mind as she started assessing the teen's condition. They quickly determined that she was stable enough to be moved. Callie lifted her effortlessly as Arizona rushed ahead to go wake up the rest of the doctors. She grabbed a nearby phone and called for an ambulance. The next two minutes were a mad scramble as several doctors went from confusion, to shock, to horror. Even amidst the chaos, the injured teen didn't stir.

Lexie, Callie and Arizona all insisted on going in the ambulance. The ride to the hospital took less than half the time as it normally would as the vehicle raced through the roads. Soon they were in the ER. "I'll be her doctor on paper; none of you are allowed to be assigned because you are too close with the patient." Meredith said as she wheeled the gurney into a private exam room. The three didn't protest, but came into the room with her.

"Get me an IV started; we don't know how long she was out there for." Meredith instructed. Arizona was the first to react. The CT and MRI's were cleared for them, and Meredith was able to rule out any severe damage. "No internal bleeding, or serious brain injury. A fairly severe concussion though, likely from being knocked unconscious by what appears to be a glass or a vase." She gestured to the shards of glass embedded in Alice's skin. "She's already started waking up, I don't doubt that she'll be fully conscious soon. Lexie, do you want to help us fix the cuts and remove the glass, or sit with her when she's up?" Meredith offered her younger sister the option.

"Definitely going to sit with her." Lexie decided. Meredith nodded. Just as predicted, Alice shifted and groaned in pain. A few seconds later she opened her eyes. "L..ex..ie?" Her voice was a hoarse whisper.

"Right here hon." Lexie assured her.

"I'm sorry." Alice managed to say.

"Shh it's alright. You're going to be just fine, Mer, Arizona and Callie are gonna fix you up right now." Alice nodded weakly. Lexie sat on the exam table and pulled Alice's head into her lap. She nodded at the expectant doctors, and they got to work.

Alice was silent the whole time, not even uttering a word as they pulled shards of glass out. Callie felt around Alice's torso as gently as she could to make sure none of the cracked ribs would need to be set, and determined that they would heal alright. Finally, after finishing the last of the bandages, the doctors pulled their gloves off. "You're all done." Arizona said, smiling.

Meredith, Arizona, and Callie all left the room, understanding that Alice probably wouldn't say what happened until she was alone with Lexie. They gave her small, comforting smiles as they left. Lexie and Alice were finally alone.

"Alice, what happened?" Lexie asked, brushing a couple strands of hair out of the girl's face. Alice took in a deep, shaky breath before answering.

"A couple blocks away from the house, my...my mother pulled up next to me in the car. She said she had changed, that she had left my father and wanted me to come live with her. And I figured it would be better for you if I left. So I got in her car and she drove to this apartment place. But as soon as I stepped in the door, she knocked me out with a vase." Alice was wiping as she finished. Lexie took her in her arms and waited patiently for her to continue.

"When I woke up, they were both standing over me. And my father starting screaming at me, saying I tried to get them arrested. Then they both, you know, took it out on me. It went on for hours Lexie. I didn't even realize where I was by the time they dropped me off." Alice finished. Her body ached all over, despite the amount of pain killers she had been given. But she did appreciate the fog it put over her mind.

"It's over now. You never have to see them again; we'll make sure that the police catch them this time." She assured Alice, who nodded. "Do you want to stay here for the day, or should I take you home? I think it's almost the end of Meredith's shift by now, I'm sure she could stay with you until I get back." Lexie offered.

"I don't like it here. Can I please go home?" Alice asked in a small voice.

"Of course." Lexie nodded. "I'll be back in fifteen minutes, tops."

Alice nodded and shifted to allow Lexie to get up. She walked from the room and closed the door softly behind her. A few minutes later, it re-opened. Jessica was standing in the door frame.

"Mind if I come in?" She asked. Alice was now feeling the full effects of the pain killers. Everything was fuzzy.

"Guess not." Alice mumbled out. She started to sit up.

"Nu uh, none of that. Manners don't matter when you're on death's doorstep." Jessica walked over and sat by the bed. Her eyes travelled down Alice's body, taking in the damage. "Fucking bastards." She said at last.

"Mmhm..." Alice replied after a moment. "If you're here for an impromptu post-beating, psychoanalysis session, it's kind of not the greatest time." Alice managed to sound hassled.

"Oh no, nothing like that. Just came by to see how you were doing. The crazy is forgiven for today anyways." Jessica's smile was genuine.

"That's probably a good thing. I think I'm going need that allowance when these fantastic drugs wear off." Alice replied.

"Hey now, don't go getting hooked on painkillers." Jessica's tone was light, but there was a hint of seriousness to it as well. The teenager nodded weakly in understanding.

"So, Lexie's taking you home soon?" Jessica asked, trying as hard as she could not to focus on one injury for too long.

"Yeah, thank God. It's funny; I didn't realize I was right outside the house the entire night when I was lying there." Alice's speach started to slur from the medication, and her thoughts became jumbled.

"You were lucky you were conscious enough to not realize it." Jessica told the girl.

"It was cold." Alice said thoughtfully. Jessica found it odd to see the girl so seemingly air-headed.

"I bet. It was 33 degrees last night." The psychologist replied.

"Why do they hate me so much?" Her inhibitions were gone, and now the questions that she kept to herself were coming up.

Jessica's eyes widened as she realized that there was absolutely no filter to what was coming out of Alice's mouth. "Alice, it's because they're heartless fucking bastards." Jessica replied. Alice smirked.

"Do you think...do you think Lexie's mad at me for going with my mom?" Alice asked next, rolling her head to the side to stare at Jess.

"No, no of course not. She's just glad you're back and safe." Jessica assured the girl.

"Really? That's good." Alice noted, swinging her arm back and forth off the side of the exam table. Just then, their conversation was interrupted when Lexie walked in through the door.

"Hi Lexie." Alice said, sitting up and then nearly falling off the exam table. Jessica quickly caught her and stabilized her as the teenager got onto her feet.

"Hey, just sit back for a second, alright? I'm just going to take your IV out." Lexie said, immediately seeing that Alice was completely out of it. The teenager nodded and leaned back against the table, with Jessica still supporting her. Lexie quickly took the IV out of the Alice's hand and quickly pit a bandage on.

Jessica accompanied Alice and Lexie through the hospital. Alice had refused a wheelchair, opting to instead stumble through the halls while leaning on Lexie. Half of the time, her eyes were wide; and the other half of the time, they were drooping and nearly shut. Finally, Jessica and Lexie got her to the car and into the passenger seat.

Lexie drove home at a slow pace, careful to keep from jostling the car too much. Alice had fallen silent and stared out the windows with a distant stare. By the time she was home, Meredith was there to help her into the house. The older Grey escorted her up the stairs and into her room.

"Just holler if you need me and break something if you really need me." Meredith smiled at Alice. She nodded and collapsed on her bed.

"Bye." Alice mumbled and waved her hand in the general direction of the door. Meredith chuckled at the dismissal but obliged.

Jessica downed a mug of coffee in the resident's house kitchen. She had managed to hitch a ride back to the hospital with Kepner and was just leaving. She waved at Lexie and Mark, who had been waiting for Lexie's return home. As she exited the house, Lexie turned to look at Mark.

"How bad was it?" He asked.

"Three ribs were refractured, various cuts and bruises. The worst was her head. They hit her with a vase or something. It took forever to get all the glass out and she's got a pretty bad concussion." Lexie said bitterly. Mark shook his head.

"She's never going to be able to be around me now. That bastard is all she's going to see in me." He said, slamming his fist down on the counter.

"Mark, it'll just take more time, I promise." Lexie said, putting a hand on his arm.

"I hope so." He replied, glancing at his watch. "I have surgery in an hour, so I'm going to head back. Want a ride over?" He offered.

"Sure, I've got some paperwork to catch up on. Thanks." She grabbed two apples from the bowl, tossing one in Mark's direction. He caught it deftly. Lexie glanced up towards the stairs. Mark caught on.

"I'll go start the car, you go ahead and say bye to Alice." Lexie nodded gratefully and headed up the stairs. She reached Alice's room and opened the door gently.

"Hey, you awake?" Lexie asked, unsure of whether or not the drugs would have made her fall asleep or not. Alice's head flew up from where it was buried in the pillow. Lexie hid a grimace as she saw two dark bruises marring her face.

"Wha?" Alice asked disorientedly. She then winced as a bit of pain hit her.

"I'm going to back to the hospital soon. Meredith and Alex are here if you need anything. You can pretty get them to do whatever you want." Lexie said, giving the girl a small smile.

"I don't want to sleep." Alice told the surgeon. She stood up and then was forced to steady herself on the bed. Lexie hurried forward to help her, but Alice waved her off, having caught her balance. The teenager brushed past Lexie and then started downstairs.

Mark looked up as he heard footsteps coming down the stairs. He stood up, assuming it was Lexie, but then froze. It was Alice.

"Oh, sorry. I was just leaving." Mark said quickly. He whirled around and hurried towards the door, not wanting to upset the teen any further.

"Mark, it's okay." Alice said quietly. He stopped and turned around to look at her in surprise.

"I...I thought I reminded you of your father." Mark said, still keeping his distance. Alice walked down the remaining steps and then walked closer to him.

"No one can resemble anyone as awful as my father. I'm sorry for how I acted around you Mark." Alice replied. Mark's eyebrows rose in surprise.

"Whoa, Alice. It's okay!" Lexie said, mistaking the scene in front of her for Alice being frozen in terror.

"I know it is." Alice replied calmly. Lexie glanced between her and Mark in surprise.

There was a couple of seconds of silence. "Well, awkward. I'm um hungry, so I'll see you guys later." Alice shifted awkwardly for a moment before heading for the kitchen. Lexie shooed Mark out the door, wanting to get out of Alice's earshot. As soon as the door shut, she turned to Mark, still stunned.

"What did you say?" Lexie asked incredulously.

"Absolutely nothing. Well, except for that I would leave. I guess she sort of had an epiphany? Who knows? I'm just glad that I don't have to worry about scaring her anymore." Mark explained.

"Wow. Well that's, um, that's great!" Lexie said as they got into her car. Immediately she rolled the windows down, as her car still smelled like vomit. Feeling relieved for the first time in a very long time, she took off towards the hospital.

Alice wandered into the kitchen to find Meredith and Alex sitting at the kitchen table.

"Hey kid, how're you feeling?" Alex asked as the teenager sat down at the table.

"Like shit." She mumbled, wincing as she leaned back in the chair. Both he and Meredith frowned.

"Didn't Lexie give you your pain pills?" Meredith asked, getting up from her chair. Alice rose her eyebrows and shook her head.

"Must have forgot. Here, take two of these. But I'm going to warn you Alice; these are really strong." Meredith said, handing two small tablets to Alice.

"So is the pain." Alice replied quietly before downing the two tablets.

"I'd imagine. Now you better get back upstairs before that kicks in." Meredith said. Alice nodded, almost reluctantly.

"Thanks Mer. See you Alex." The teenager mumbled as she limped towards the stairs, careful not to jar her many injuries. She was starting to feel the effects of the Oxycodone by the time she was at the top of the stairs, and she loved it. As she sat down on her bed, she didn't feel the pain she had expected. She was numb, and it felt great. Sighing contently, Alice fumbled for the switch on her lamp and turned out the light. Pain free and mind fogged up, she fell into a deep sleep.

_**Hey guys, sorry for the delay. We certainly hope we get lots of reviews for this chapter, and I promise I'll get the next one up sooner **_


	24. Chapter 24

Days turned into weeks. Alice no longer needed the drugs for the physical pain, but kept finding excuses to get more, simply for the mental relief that they provided. She had delayed going back to Jess for weeks, but Lexie was finally putting her foot down and today Alice had no other option than to go.

Alice heaved a sigh before opening the door to her therapist's office. "I'll see you later." She said to Lexie as she stepped through the door. Lexie nodded. "Hey Jess!" She called through the door. "Bye, Ali." She said, and then turned for the hallway. "Well hey stranger." Jessica stood up from her desk and offered the teen a smile.

Alice mumbled a 'hi' back but said nothing further. Jessica frowned. Ever since the big blow out and then apology, things had gotten much better. Alice was generally fairly chatty, and had fewer reservations about letting Jess in. Today was unusual. Given her mood, Jessica wasted no time with small talk. "How are you doing, mentally I mean? It's been weeks since the... encounter. How goes it?" She asked the sullen teenager.

Alice looked up from where she was picking at her nail polish. She glared for a moment, and then went back to her chipping away, remaining silent.

"Hey, what the fuck is this attitude for?" Jessica asked, raising her voice.

"I'm doing just peachy, ." She snapped, sarcasm dripping from her voice. Jessica raised her eyebrows in surprise. The sarcasm and official title hadn't come out since day two. Something was definitely amiss. Jess sat quietly, studying Alice. Her speech wasn't quite as pronounced, her movements slightly unpolished. That coupled with the defensiveness, sudden privacy, and vicious moods were a definite indicator for substance abuse. And with all that Alice had been through, turning to drugs for an escape wouldn't surprise Jess in the least.

"Alice, can I ask you a question?" Jessica said carefully. Alice rolled her eyes.

"Well, you're going to anyway, so whatever." The teen retorted sarcastically.

"Are you still on your pain medication?" The psychologist asked, trying to keep her tone from sounding accusing or too serious.

Alice's eyes flickered to Jessica's face for a second, and she swore that she saw a brief flash of alarm. "Yeah, doctor's orders. What's it to you?" She snapped.

"It's been nearly six weeks. You're not injured. You shouldn't still be on that stuff. It's too strong." Jessica countered. Alice narrowed her eyes.

"You're a psychologist. You don't know shit about meds," Her voice was full of contempt.

"Psychiatrist actually. I prescribe meds all the time. And I am well aware what this drug is doing to you. Don't do this to yourself." Alice's gaze hardened as the woman said this.

"I'm sorry, was that a look of sadness that I just saw? Like my broad spectrum fucked up-ness actually saddens you? What a joke. You could care less if I stick around or not. There's _always_ another patient in line for the devil shrink." Alice glanced away and looked down to her nails without a care in the world. Jessica took the opportunity. She moved quickly, and before Alice could comprehend what was happening, she was pinned into the couch by a very ticked off Jess.

"Get. Off. Of. Me." She growled, fighting the panic that was building in her chest.

"Go to hell. I don't care if you fuck up your life beyond repair but you damn well do not get to hurt Lexie by doing so. If you won't seek help, I'll do it for you." Jessica pushed off of the couch and reached for her phone. "Hey Lex. I need you in my office, now please."

A few minutes later, a breathless Lexie burst through the door. "What, what is it?!" She gasped.

"Close the door and sit for a minute." Jessica replied. Lexie looked confused, but obliged. Once she was settled on the couch, Jessica started to talk. "Alice needs to come off of those meds, now. She no longer needs them for physical injuries, but requests them so she can get her hands on the drugs. She's abusing them, and before long you're going to have a VERY serious addiction on your hands. If you thought pot and alcohol was bad, wait until you have to deal with a hard core Oxy addict." Jessica waited for Lexie's reaction.

"It's not true, Lex. The devil shrink is lying. She's jealous that I take up all of your time, she wants me shipped off to rehab so she can have her little bestie back." Alice glared fiercely at the redhead.

"Alice, enough. It's not as if we haven't noticed your habit. Jessica is right. This ends now." Lexie's voice was firm.

"Fuck off, both of you." Alice said, standing up from the couch and running out the door. Lexie stood up and went after her, and Jessica followed close behind.

"Alice! Stop!" Lexie yelled after the teenager. Alice only quickened her pace to a jog, and then a sprint, before making a bee-line for the stairs.

"Damn it!" Lexie cursed as she picked up the pace after Alice. The teen slipped into the stairwell, sprinting down the stairs. Lexie and Jess burst into the stairwell just in time to watch in horror as Alice's foot slipped and she flew down the stairs with a crash.

"Shit!" Jessica cursed as she hurried over to Alice's still form.

"Alice, can you hear me?" Lexie asked as she crouched by her still form. Alice moaned and rolled over. Both Jess and Lexie sighed in relief. She opened her eyes and pushed herself up, ignoring the two older girl's efforts to help her up.

"This changes nothing. Kicking your addiction is going to be tough; a little tumble down the stairs isn't going to stop us from persisting." Jessica informed Alice. The teen's smug smile slipped from her face.

"Oh yeah? Try and stop me." She snapped, standing up and starting for the stairs again.

"No! Enough of this bullshit," Lexie pinned Alice against the wall, preventing her from fleeing. "You've been through hell and back, only to be put straight through hell again. And I'm not sure you'll ever know how awful it is to watch you in pain like this. And I'm sorry if I'm taking away your only escape. But Alice, it's a quick fix. An escape, not a solved problem. It's going to be hard to come back from this, and I know you'll never be the same girl that I found in the hallway with a hole in her side. But you're going to come back from this, and you'll be stronger for it. And honey, don't think for a second that you're going to be alone in this. I'm here, even when it's hard. So is Jess. And Callie, Arizona, Mer, everyone. I love you, Alice. And that's why I'm going to make sure you get better, even if it's the hardest thing that we ever do."

Alice didn't know how to respond. Lexie had just said that she loved her. She fumbled in her mind for a response.

"I don't want help Lex." She sighed, leaning against the wall. "I'm not ready to face this, not yet." She directed her words to Jess this time. "You get that, you have to. It's your job. To make it better. Please, don't push this and make it worse for me than it already is." She felt tears welling in her eyes and she brushed them away quickly.

"My job description doesn't include letting screwed up teens continue their drug habit." Jessica replied bluntly. Alice stared at her for a moment. She shrugged away from the wall and slipped out of Lexie's arms. She stepped closer to the therapist, and then slapped her. An honest-to-god bitchslap, right across the face. There was a second of silence as the two adults stood in shock.

"Fuck you, Jessica. I 'opened up' and all you have to say is to remind me about my awful problem. You think I want to be like this? Unable to trust, scared by a simple physical gesture. Dependent on tablets of chemicals to bring me an escape from this constant pain? Absolutely not. And you have no idea, you self-righteous little bitch. You've got it so easy, the perfect life. Rolling in the money by sitting and reminding people of just how fucked up they really are. You've got no idea what this is like, so unless you can actually do your job and help me, on MY terms, stay the hell away from me." She turned away and hurried down the stairs, disappearing through the door and into a wing on the unit below.

* * *

><p>Alice wandered around the wing, managing to stay totally inconspicuous. She halted in front of the door she was looking for, and pulled a card out of her pocket. It was Lexie's ID card. She slipped it into the reader that locked the door, and heard the access beep. She slipped into the room that stored all of the drugs for this unit. Alice gave a self-indulgent smile and started taking her pick. She selected a few packages of some very potent pain drugs, and slipped back out before anyone noticed. Tucking them into her purse, she strolled to the elevator.<p>

Alice figured that they would be searching the hospital for her, in the remote areas. Hiding in plain sight was her smartest option. She pressed the button for the psych floor. The ride was short. She jogged down the hall and into Jessica's office, enjoying the irony. Getting high as a kite in her therapists's office. She reached for Jess's abandoned latte, and popped in a liberal handful of the pills. She washed them down with the coffee and walked over to the couch and collapsed on it, relishing in the drug's near-instant effects.

"Fuck." Alice whispered to herself as the room started to spin. She sank down onto the office's loveseat and took in a deep breath. Her eyes were huge as she looked around the room. This was the highest she'd ever been.

"C'mon, let's sit in my office and regroup." Jessica's voice floated down the hall. Alice smiled briefly to herself. Good, let them come in and see her high as a kite on the couch of the psychiatrist. She was barely able to form thoughts through the blissful haze. Footsteps sounded closer, and Alice's eyes slipped closed as she gave in to the fog entirely. Jessica's conversation cut off mid word.

"Good lord." She muttered as she saw the girl. Lexie gasped.

"Damn it Alice, what have you done now?" Jessica murmured, mostly to herself. She stepped over to her desk where the boxes, half emptied, sat. She scanned over the labels and shook her head. Lexie sat by the girl, racking her brain for a solution.

"No point, Lex. She's too far gone to do anything. Thank god she hasn't OD'd. Now we have to wait for it to break." Jess interrupted her train of thought. Lexie sighed heavily but agreed.

"Arizona and Callie should know." She said at last. The redhead nodded in agreement. Lexie pulled out her phone and reluctantly punched in Arizona's number.

Minutes passed, though it felt like hours to the former roommates. Arizona and Callie joined them as soon as they could.

* * *

><p>Finally Alice started to come around. She shifted on the couch and opened her eyes. "Fuck." She muttered to herself as she felt around on the table for where she had left the pills, clearly not noticing the doctors yet.<p>

"Oh no you don't." Lexie caught her hand. Alice's eyes searched until she found Lexie's face.

"Fuck!" She repeated, yanking her arm away from the surgeon. She glanced to her other arm where Arizona was fiddling with the IV that she put in to reverse the effects of the narcotics and sober Alice up. "Don't touch me!" She snarled and tried to pull away.

"Cut it out. Let me just get this out of your arm." Arizona reasoned. Alice glared resentfully but stilled. Once freed from the IV, she sat up on the couch, noticing Callie, whose face was set in an unreadable mask. She glanced around, eyes landing on Jessica.

"Goddamnit. Just leave. You've done enough. Go fuck up someone else's life; I'm sick of you fucking up mine." She spat harshly. Jessica stood in place and raised an eyebrow challengingly. A smile spread across Alice's face. "How's your cheek?" She asked, voice sweet and innocent. Alice turned her attention to Lexie. "Perhaps my actions in the stairwell weren't clear enough. Shall I slap you as well? Maybe then you'll get the message that I don't need your help." Alice narrowed her eyes as Lexie simply shook her head.

"It's not optional." Lexie replied. Alice stood up and stepped towards Lexie. Her whole body language exuded a quiet fury, and promised violence. Callie, who had been observing silently, darted forward and grabbed hold of Alice. She yelped in surprise, and then quickly lashed out. Callie's grip was firm though, and the teen was powerless. Alice struggled uselessly against the doctor. Arizona motioned to Jess and Lexie to step back, and they did.

"Alice, that's enough. Stop fighting Callie." Arizona's voice was gentle but she had a quiet ring of authority to it. It was part of what made her such a fantastic kids surgeon; her uncanny ability to calm patients down. Alice glared challengingly at Arizona, but after a moment her struggles quieted. Arizona wore her "super magic smile" as Callie so fondly described it. "Good girl." She said, and nodded at Callie who led her over to the couch and sat her down. Arizona joined her on the other side.

"Alice, can you look at me please?" She asked. The teen glanced up hesitantly. "There. Now, do you really want to hurt Lexie?" She asked gently.

"No." Alice's voice was barely a whisper.

"I know you don't. But those drugs that you took? They make you think that you want to do all kinds of awful things. Things that you wouldn't think of doing when you were sober. I know you, you're not that kind of girl. It's scary, isn't it? Not being in control of your thoughts, that compulsive need to hurt those that you love, those that are trying to help." Alice nodded, tears spilling onto her cheeks.

"Hey, it's alright. C'mere." Arizona glanced at Callie who slowly released her grip. Alice slid over and the blonde pulled her into a hug. Alice sobbed brokenly. "I don't know what to do. It never stops hurting, and I'm always scared." She choked out between sobs. "I know. We're gonna fix this." Arizona promised.

_**Hey guys, sorry about the wait. Please leave us some reviews!**_


	25. Chapter 25

The group of doctors all agreed that it was best to stick together and monitor Alice. They brought her to Callie and Arizona's apartment, which wasn't bustling with residents, and therefore a better place for Alice to stay. They knew that the room was clean of drugs, and made Alice change her shirt and jeans to remove any possibilities of her having any hidden pills on her. They let her be in the guest room, and spent the next hour deciding the course of action.

"I'll go check on her." Lexie said, noticing the clock. She fetched a glass of water and headed down the hall. She opened the door. Alice glanced up from her book. "Brought you some water." Lexie gave a half smile and placed it on the table beside the bed before retreating back to the doorframe.

"Thanks." Alice said. As soon as Lexie left, Alice reached under her shirt. She fiddled around with her bra, and found the small purple pill that she had cleverly hid in the underwire. "Lex?" She called out. The door opened. "Yeah?" She asked.

"Perhaps I should consider becoming an actress. My little performance for Arizona was outstanding, if I do say so myself." She tossed the pill in her mouth and swallowed it dry before Lexie could react.

"No!" She gasped and darted forward, but it was too late. The pill, though small, was extraordinarily strong. "Bye, Lex." Alice smirked as she slipped into a thick and powerful drug-induced haze.

"Come on Alice, wake up." Lexie coaxed, shaking the girl a bit. It was no use, she was out. God, Lexie wished she knew what the girl had taken. Judging by the purple color, she figured it was one of the stronger doses of Oxy. But there was no way to be sure. Sighing, Lexie stood up and left the room quickly to inform the other doctors in the house what had happened.

"I don't know where she got it, but Alice just downed another pill." Lexie said, entering Callie and Arizona's living room. Everyone's heads snapped over to her in surprise.

"How the hell did she get her hands on it?! She went in clean!" Callie shook her head in disbelief.

"Beats me. I'm not sure what it was that she took, but she was out like a light in seconds." A look of concern crossed over Arizona's face when she heard this.

"I'll go stay with her, keep an eye on her vitals. Lex, you go and get an IV from the hospital." Arizona was grateful that she was so close to work. Lexie nodded.

"Back in ten." She said as she headed out the door.

"I'll call the house and let the other residents know that Lexie won't be around for a while." Callie volunteered. Jess nodded in approval and followed Arizona down to where Alice was.

Arizona and Jess sat in the guest room, awaiting Lexie's return. Every so often, Arizona would check for a pulse, relieved that it was still strong. As promised, Lexie appeared in the room a mere 15 minutes later, IV bag in hand. Arizona worked quickly to set it up, and sure enough Alice started to stir.

"What the fuck, why do I keep passing out..." She muttered to herself, obviously oblivious to the doctors.

"Because you take too much. If you cut back on the dosage you'd just be really high instead of completely out of it." Jessica answered. Alice jumped, and then slowly turned to face her.

"I'm not sure how many times I have to repeat myself. Leave. Me. The. _Fuck_. Alone." She glared at Jess, and then ripped the IV out of her arm before anyone could stop her. She winced as it hurt, and then tossed it aside.

"Hey! Quit giving her so much shit. Believe it or not, she has helped you Alice. Just because she's still trying doesn't give you the right to be a bitch." Callie yelled at Alice, whose eyes widened.

"What the fuck would you know about that Callie? You barely give me a sideways glance unless I'm dying!" Alice yelled back. Callie opened her mouth to say something, but couldn't think of what words to say.

"See? If you could deny it you would, but you know it's the truth! How would you feel if someone kept trying to force their help onto you, ignoring when you want them to back off, pushing you to your wits end? None of you are in the position to judge me, because none of you truly know what it's like to live like this!" Alice glanced at all of the doctors, her gaze settling on Lexie.

"Regardless of that or not Alice, you still need help. If you keep up with these drugs, you are literally going to be killing yourself. And you've survived too damn much to do that to yourself." Arizona told the teenager gently.

"Isn't that for me to decide? I mean, I'm not even related to you people. The only reason I know you is some psycho put a bullet in my side." Alice said defensively. Lexie had been expecting her to play that card.

"Alice, you live with me. If you didn't know us, where would you be right now?" She reasoned softly. She was getting frustrated with how bull headed the teenager was about getting help. There had to be another way to do this.

"I don't know. Maybe living with Chip." Alice murmured. Surely she would have been alright without the doctors, right?

"Chip?" Callie raised her eyebrow in confusion, as did the other doctors.

"Yeah, Chip. The kid I snuck out of the house that one night. Remember Lexie, you almost bit my fucking head off for it?" Alice said.

Oh yeah, Chip. Because that would put you in a good position, living with a hippie ass stoner." Jessica scoffed. Alice's stare hardened.

"Shut it ginger. You don't get a say in this." She snarled. Jessica rolled her eyes.

"Alice, why don't you want help?" Lexie asked exasperatedly.

"Because I know it won't do anything! God, why can't you people get that? It'll just bbe a fucking waste of time!" Alice yelled tiredly. She was tired of explaining it.

"Alice, I swear to God I will send you to rehab if I have to." The young surgeon threatened.

"Yeah, you'd love to send me away, wouldn't you? It's fine, I'll leave myself." Alice replied, starting towards the door. Callie grabbed her by the arm and held her back.

"Whatever, Lexie. I don't care, I'm not listening. Save your breath." Alice replied. Lexie threw her hands up in frustration and stormed out of the room. Jess followed. There was some conversation, and then Jess walked back in. She glanced at Arizona, some sort of silent communication. Arizona stood up and left, Callie following suit.

"No. Go away. Not talking to you, not listening to what you have to say." Alice said harshly.

"Tough. You have no choice." Jess replied. Alice rolled her eyes and flipped her off before turning her back and stretching on the bed with her head buried in the pillows. Jessica walked over from where she stood in the doorway. "Alice, don't shut me out." She said. No reaction from the teen. "You can only shut so much out." She persisted, with no luck. Jessica reached down and flipped Alice over so she was facing her.

"Gah! What the fuck! Boundaries, you crazy bitch!" She was clearly rattled.

"Well, there's a reaction." Was all Jess said in reply. Alice scoffed and went back to ignoring her. Jess pulled Alice's tee up, baring her scarred stomach. Alice freaked out and tried to get up, but Jessica's light hold on her abdomen prevented the teen from moving. "This is the root of the problem. This fear from being attacked, the memories that flood back. The drugs are all an attempt to escape it." Jessica continued. She traced the scars lightly, over and over again. Alice couldn't stop the trembling now.

"The problem is, fear this bad can't be escaped by simply swallowing some pills. It's totally consuming you; it's a psychological obsession. Some days it's not so bad, because the drugs cover it up. But it's never going to go away by pills alone. And this is why I won't leave. Because you need this help. Me leaving you, in the mental state that you are living in, is like Lexie walking away from a dying patient. It's not right, and it won't happen."

"Then make it happen. Because you people pressuring me isn't going to do anything." Alice told the psychologist in an annoyed, but calm voice.

"What do you think will happen when you end up overdosing? Do you know what that would do to her?" Jessica asked the teenager, whose eyebrows came together as she frowned.

"She'll get over it. I'll die, and everyone will be better off for it, no more of this bullshit. Sure, she'll be sad for a bit. But she's only known me for what, a few months. How devastated could she be?" Alice didn't sound entirely confident in her answer.

"You don't need me to answer that. You already know what kind of pain that would put her through." Jessica replied. Alice glanced away.

"So fine, say I cut back. How am I supposed to be happy and normal again?" She glanced pointedly at her stomach, where Jess was still tracing the scars. Alice's unease was evident.

"Trust, Alice. It seems to be the hardest thing for you, and I don't blame you. But you need to have faith in me, and let me help you get over this." Jessica was no longer furiously intense, but quiet and compelling. Alice wished so desperately that she could simply give up the fight and allow herself to get some help, but her damn instincts clung fiercely to the need to keep herself safe.

Alice sighed. "Fine. Try as you might. But I can't promise that it'll work." Jess smiled.

"As long as you give me a chance, it's all that I ask." She replied.

"Now go away. I'm tired." Alice said. Jessica rolled her eyes, but obliged and left the girl's room.  
>Lexie waited for Jessica out in the hall. As soon as the woman stepped out of Alice's room, she led Lexie away from the door and into the living room, where Callie and Arizona were waiting as well.<p>

"Well?" Callie asked tiredly, leaning her head on Arizona's shoulder.

"She agreed to let me try to help her." Jessica said, smiling a bit.

"How the hell did you manage that?" The Latina replied in surprise.

"I just...talked to her. Although, she did say something that scares me a bit." Jessica frowned, sitting down on the living room's love seat.

"What?" Lexie, Arizona, and Callie all demanded at the same time.

"She thinks we'd be better off if she died." Jessica said quietly.

"Damn it." Callie hissed in frustration. "That's entirely false. No one would be better off if she died. Where the hell does she get off thinking these things?" Her voice rose.

"Shh! She doesn't need to hear this. Callie, when a mind goes through something like this, lives in this constant kind of pain, it can have a tendency to think irrationally. Only see the present. The present for her is an endless existence of pain. She's only trying to find a solution that she believes is best for everyone!" Jessica tried to put Alice's thoughts into perspective.

"But she's wrong! No one will be better off with her gone!" Lexie stood up off the couch, intent on trying to make Alice think clearly.

"Lexie, stop. She doesn't need more people telling her how she should think, feel, and react. She just needs support to deal with it all. If you're going to go and see her, you go to comfort and support, not to try and make her see things a different way." Arizona spoke up. Jessica nodded.

"She's entirely correct. If you're going to go see her, don't try and talk her out of anything. Don't tell her that she's wrong, don't try and make her see things differently. Just help her work though whatever it is she needs to." Jess added. Lexie nodded in understanding and started for the hall.

Lexie knocked quietly. "What?" Alice snapped irritably. Lexie pushed open the door. "Oh, it's you. What do you want?" She asked tiredly.

"Nothing." Lexie replied simply. She walked over to the bed and sat down. "Scooch over." She instructed.

"What? Why?" Alice glanced suspiciously at the surgeon, but did what she asked. Lexie lay down and pulled the teen closer. "What is this?" She asked. Lexie shook her head.

"No questions. Right now, we're nothing more than the two girls who saved each other. No drugs, no fear. Just us." She replied. .

"You don't have to come lie down with me because we totally freaked outbon each other." Alice said, still trying to maintain her tough little shell.

Lexie rolled her eyes. "Drop the act, kiddo. No one buys it, even if you'd like to think they do." Alice bristled and glared, but it was only half-hearted. "Oh stop that and get your skinny ass over here." Alice stuck her tongue out but obliged, secretly relieved that she could relax her guard for once.

Alice allowed Lexie to wrap an arm around her and leaned into the surgeon's shoulder. Though she would never admit it, she felt safer. Drugs kind of slipped from her mind, and she was able to focus on other things.

"I just want you to know that if you died, I wouldn't be able to live with myself, Alice." Lexie told the now dozing off girl.

Alice just sort of shrugged and turned so that she wasn't looking at Lexie. _Great,_ she thought to herself, _now they probably all think I'm suicidal_.

A couple minutes later, Alice fell asleep. Lexie slid her arm out from under the teenager and crept out of the room, shutting the lights off as she went.

"She okay?" Arizona asked as soon as Lexie walked into the room.

"Yeah, she's alright for now." Lexie replied.

"Good. Now how the hell do we keep her that way?" Callie asked in frustration. Arizona put a hand on her arm to calm her girlfriend down.

"I...I honestly don't know." Lexie sighed. She sat down on the couch and ran her fingers through her hair.

"Maybe we should just lock her in her room for a couple days. Keep an eye on her, only let her out to go to the bathroom." Callie suggested bluntly. The surgeons exchanged glances

"No. You know how mad that would make her, and she wouldn't be there forever. As soon as she got out she would run, or worse..." Jessica shot down the idea.

"Well then what do you suggest?" Callie shot back, still rather frustrated.

"Keep her here, for starters. This house is guaranteed to be clean of drugs, and there isn't the hustle bustle that comes along with living with five residents. Don't actually lock her in the room, but try to keep her generally in the house for a few days. She's not going to be going through the severe physical symptoms associated with a long-time addict, but that doesn't mean she won't be dying for a hit. Once the initial three days pass, we can figure out what we want to do from there. But in all honesty, this needs to seem as normal and routine as possible. She's strong-headed, to say the least. She's not going to like being crept around and locked up like some sort of prisoner." Jess suggested this as a game plan, and the others agreed.

"This is going to be terrible." Arizona said. Everyone nodded in agreement, but they knew it had to be done. What other option did they have?

"Well Lex, you and Jessica can sleep in here tonight if you want. I suggest we all get some sleep because the moment she wakes up, she's going to be craving pills." Callie said, standing up from the couch.

"This is going to be terrible." Arizona said. Everyone nodded in agreement, but they knew it had to be done. What other option did they have?

"Well Lex, you and Jessica can sleep in here tonight if you want. I suggest we all get some sleep because the moment she wakes up, she's going to be craving pills." Callie said, standing up from the couch.

The surgeons said goodnight to one another and went to sleep as soon as they could, hoping to get in a few hours of shuteye. They managed for the most part. Lexie was the first one up when she heard the door handle turn. When she opened her eyes, she saw Alice attempting to open the door without making any noise.

"What are you doing?" Lexie asked, still a little disoriented from sleep. She sat up from the couch, waking Jessica up as she did.

"Nothing." Alice replied, stepping away from the door. She waited in a tense silence.

"She's trying to leave." Jessica said, sitting up and rubbing her eyes. It was then that both doctors noticed Alice's appearance. She had dressed in shorts and a tank top, with a hoodie half zipped up and a backpack slung over her shoulder. Her skin was paler than normal and her eyes were irritated and red. Both doctors could tell that the muscles in her body were tensed. This was going to be harder than they thought.

_**Hey guys….not many reviews last time. Oh well, we did kind of take a long time to update. Please review…..please! :D**_


	26. Chapter 26

"Going somewhere?" Jessica asked in a lazy tone.

"Yeah, actually I am. I'll be sure to send a postcard though." Alice rolled her eyes and reached for the door.

"How kind. But actually, I'd prefer it if you just didn't leave at all." She replied.

"Well, looks like you're in for a disappointment then." Alice turned the lock, and Jess stood up, walking quickly over to the teen.

"Actually, it seems that you're going to be the one who will have to deal with a little letdown." She said as she leaned against the door, effectively spoiling Alice's plans. Her eyes narrowed.

"Move, Jess." She said in a calm voice. Jess raised her eyebrow and stood in place. "I said get out of the way." Alice's tone was now dangerous.

Jess simply rolled her eyes. Alice slipped her hand into her jeans pocket, pulling out a small black object. She fiddled with it in her hand for a few moments, before flipping a switch to reveal a silver blade. It wasn't particularly long, but if push came to shove it would be very good at its job.

"Don't make me use it." Alice threatened. Lexie started to get off of the couch to help Jess, but the psychiatrist shook her head and Lexie sat down. Alice stepped forward. The light streaming in from the window glimmered off the blade.

"Get the fuck out of my way. Don't be stupid, you know that I have no trouble using the blade if I need it." The happy go lucky teen was gone, and in her place was the ruthlessly determined, anger fueled girl who would act without fear of repercussions. She darted forward, knife ready, and finally Jess acted. She caught hold of her wrists and knocked her to the floor, pinning her in place in one effortless move.

"Rule number one of psychology: don't plan your life working with crazy people without having a third degree black belt." She told Alice. "Lexie, you can come over now." She called out. The brunette surgeon came and stood by Jess.

"Alice, you don't want to do this. This isn't you, the sneaking around, carrying a knife, trying to use it." Jess's words had no effect on the teen. The hard gaze of a truly dangerous girl glared back.

"You don't know me then." She growled.

"Yes, I do. I know you better than you know yourself. I've seen hundreds of people, just like you. Nearly driven mad by their need to get their fix. Most of them end up dead. Their obsession kills them, in one way or another. But there is one thing that makes you different from the others." Jess paused, eyes searching the teen's face. "Lexie. None of them had a Lexie to support them, a Lexie to fight to get better for. You do. If you won't do this for yourself, do it for her."

Alice pressed her lips together. The innocent, sweet side was struggling with her dangerous one for dominance. "You can try and convince us, and convince yourself that you don't care about her. But it's a lie, and we both know it. No matter what you're dealing with, how dark of a place you may be in, you will still care for the woman who saved your life." Jessica's compelling words were starting to wear on Alice. She stopped fighting her, and lay still on the floor.

"There. Now, I want you to hand the knife over to Lexie." Jessica instructed, as she eased off a bit to let the teen sit up. Alice glanced at the knife that still rested in her hand. She seemed to think for a moment. The silence that hung through the air was broken by the click of the blade sliding back into its place, hidden in the handle. She locked eyes with Lexie for a brief moment, then cast her gaze away. She placed the knife gently in Lexie's waiting hand.

"Can you let me up now? It's obvious that I'm not going anywhere today." Alice demanded. Jess obliged and eased off of her. Alice leapt up and brushed her shorts off, glaring indignantly at the redhead. She mumbled something about cereal and stalked off to the kitchen. Lexie exhaled sharply.

"We just may be in way over our heads. I know Alice has a temper, but I never thought that she'd go as far as to pull a knife on you." Lexie sighed, running her fingers through her head.

Jess shook her head. "I was surprised that she let up that easily. All I had to do was mention you and she backed off. I've never seen that before in an addict, most of them are too far gone. I'm almost certain she'll come around." Lexie looked doubtful. "Hey, I'm serious. It'll work out." Jess insisted.

"I hope so." Lexie replied.

"It will. Now let's go find her and make sure she hasn't pulled a knife on the unsuspecting box of cheerios." Jessica laughed. Lexie's lips twitched, trying to fight a smile as she rolled her eyes good naturedly. "I'll go get the cereal crash cart." She deadpanned.

* * *

><p>Alice sat at the kitchen table, tossing a couple of pieces of dry cereal into her mouth. The only reasons she had mentioned food was to get out of the living room. Had she really just drawn a knife on Jessica? Sure, she hated the bitch. But she wasn't murderous. God, what did Lexie think of her now? Officially gone off the deep end probably. And if she didn't get a hit in a couple hours, Alice knew she was going to get worse. The teenager was aware she was slowly losing control of herself.<p>

"You guys don't have to babysit me. We're all in the same apartment." Alice said as Jessica and Lexie walked into the room.

"For some odd reason, I think we do." Jessica retorted. Alice glared at her, but then sighed.

"Jessica look, I'm sorry I pulled a knife on you. I'm just, you know, yeah." Alice said, unable to find the words to finish her sentence. But Jessica understood and then nodded.

"It's alright. I get it. You're going through withdrawal." Jessica replied in a softer tone. Alice nodded before tossing a couple more pieces of cereal into her mouth and getting up from the table.

* * *

><p>Jess and Lexie put on a movie to pass the time of their "watch shift" before Callie and Arizona switched off. "I feel bad for those two. They're going to be back in a couple hours, and they're going to get the worst of it." Jess jerked her head towards the dining room where Alice paced.<p>

"Yeah, well they volunteered, and I have a surgery." Lexie replied.

"Nice to see that you're so sympathetic." Lexie stuck her tongue out at her friend.

The two older girls were really into their movie when Alice appeared in the doorway, making them both jump. "I can't be in here anymore, it's too claustrophobic. I need to get out of this apartment. Alice and Jess exchanged a glance. "I'll just go for a run. Not far, I'll only be gone half an hour." She continued.

"Like hell you're going to be leaving our sights!" Jess exclaimed.

"I. Can't. Stay. In. Here. Any. Longer." Desperation warred with restlessness as she paced the living room, relentlessly chewing at her lip. Lexie frowned as she noticed that her bottom lip was redder than usual. She walked over and placed a hand on Alice's shoulder, making her stop. She peered at her lip and realized that the scarlet staining was blood, the result of Alice constantly chewing at it.

"You're making yourself bleed. Give it a rest and leave your lip alone." She told the girl, who yanked out of her grasp and kept pacing.

"I can't. I need out of here, right now. If you don't trust me to go alone then come with me." Lexie glanced at her watch.

"I've got to be back at the hospital in under an hour. There's not enough time for me to go." Lexie's tone was apologetic.

"Get your shoes on." Jess spoke up for the first time.

"What?" Alice glanced dubiously at her.

"You heard me. Lexie can't go, so I will. Go get your shoes on." She repeated. Alice rolled her eyes but shoved her runners on.

"Good luck keeping up." She called out as she started out the door.

"Get back here and stretch while I get my shoes gathered. I don't want to listen to you whine about a pulled muscle for the next hour." She called out after her. Alice groaned but returned reluctantly. A few minutes later, they were off.

Too impatient for the elevator, Alice all but flew down the stairs. She paused briefly to put her ear buds in and cranked up the music, making it abundantly clear to Jess that she was not up for conversation.

Alice waited for Jessica at the bottom of the stairs. The doctor walked beside her to the door and opened it for her. Just as they got outside Alice turned and gave her a smirk.

"You are so easy to trick." Alice laughed before taking off. Jessica cursed herself for not seeing it coming and sprinted after her down the street.

Alice glanced over her shoulder and saw that she had a good distance between herself and the devil shrink. She thanked her years of cheerleading for giving her such amazing stamina and kept going, dodging pedestrians as she ran. To anyone else, she would appear as a motivated young jogger.

* * *

><p>"I wonder how she's doing." Callie said as she turned the car down the street. Arizona groaned and pointed towards the end of the street.<p>

"There's your answer." The blonde doctor said. Callie followed the direction of her girlfriend's finger and groaned as she saw Alice bolting down the street. Jessica soon came into her view as well.

"I've got this." Arizona said, stepping out of the car. Alice was getting closer and closer at an impressive speed. Arizona readied herself to stop the running teen and stepped into her path.

Alice suddenly found to arms wrapped around herself. She immediately panicked and thrashed against them before the familiar perfume hit her and she realized that Arizona was holding her. "Let go." She panted, breathing heavily from the adrenaline of the escape, as well as the fear of being grabbed so suddenly. She struggled to reach her headphones as her arms were being held to her chest by Arizona's grip and then yanked them out of her ears.

Jessica caught up to the struggling teen and smirked. "Nice try. Back to the apartment it is." Jessica said, shaking her head. Anger flared in Alice's eyes and she continued to struggle against Arizona.

"Here, I'll hold her in the backseat." Jessica volunteered. Arizona carefully released Alice's arms, who immediately tried to run. Jessica caught her and was surprised when Alice literally threw herself to the ground in an attempt to resist movement. So, she took ahold of Alice under her arms and started dragging her into the car.

"Help, I'm being abducted!" Alice yelled as passerbys looked on curiously.

"Ignore her, she's a drug addict." Jessica over shouted Alice and the girl fell silent as she was forced into the car.

Alice rode in the car in a silent fury. She had been _this close_ to getting away when the fucking teacup human surgeon had stopped her. She was practically dragged out of the car, and Callie looped her arm through Alice's as they walked from the parking lot to the lobby. To any onlooker, it was nothing more than a gesture of friends, but to Alice it was a sentence back to her current prison of unmet desires.

Alice shut her mouth long enough to get into the elevator, not wanting to look completely insane in the busy lobby of the upscale condos. "Why won't you just let me go?" She begged Arizona, who was the most empathetic of the trio. "I'm in _hell _here, and it's been less than twenty four hours. If I want to leave, you have no business in stopping me. None of you are legally my guardians, so you can't prevent me from leaving if I want. It's my life; I can make decisions for myself. If I want to leave, so be it." She went at it from a practical angle, knowing that was the only way to convince a surgeon of something.

"I'm sorry Alice, I really am. But in a few weeks, you will see why we put you through this. A life of a druggie is no life for you, but if this is the only way to get you to see it then this is how it's going to be." Arizona's tone was kind, but it wasn't what Alice wanted to hear. She narrowed her eyes. Alice tried to slip her arm out of Callie's but the Latina doctor wouldn't let her.

"Oh yeah, better make sure that I don't run off into the vast miles of space in the elevator." Her tone dripped of sarcasm, but Callie ignored her. They stepped off the elevator as it dinged. Once again, Alice tried to free herself. She froze in place.

"Callie, the stairs are that way," she gestured in the opposite direction "and the elevator has left. There are three of you behind me. I'm not getting anywhere. Let me go." Callie sighed loudly and let her go. Once free, Alice walked several steps ahead. She made sure to slam the door of the condo.

Alice quickly reached into the small table in the hallway where Lexie stashed her knife earlier and slipped it back into her baggy sweater pocket before anyone came around. "Lexie?" She called out. No answer._ Great, she has already left for the hospital, and now I'm stuck with Satan psychologist, and the two who ruined my afternoon,_ she thought.

Alice quickly went to her room before she could be bothered by the damn doctors. She didn't need their help, she needed to get high. And she needed it now.

Callie immediately headed for Alice's room and knocked on the door. She ended up getting nonresponse, so she opened it to find Alice pacing anxiously back and forth.

"How're you holding up?" Callie asked, leaning against the door frame. Alice whirled around to stare at her.

"How the hell do you think I'm holding up? I need a fucking pill." Alice snapped.

"No, you don't. You 'want' a pill. Your body doesn't need that shit being shoved into it." Callie replied. Alice reached for the nearest object, a Kleenex box, and hurled it at Callie. The doctor caught it easily.

"Thanks." She said, shaking the box, and headed out the door. Alice went back to pacing and planning her next escape. Arizona let herself in a few minutes later. She was holding a plate with a sandwich and some fruit.

"Here." She said with a smile, putting it down on the dresser.

"Not hungry." Alice replied, still pacing.

"I can count your ribs through your shirt. How long has it been since you've eaten?" She demanded. "Three cheerios. Whoop de doo. Lexie tells me that it has been weeks since you've actually finished a plate of food." Alice shrugged. "Eat it, Alice. Please." She pressed on. Alice rolled her eyes.

"If I eat the goddamn food will you leave me alone?" She demanded.

"Yup." The older blonde replied. Alice gave her a hassled look before swiping a few grapes off the plate as she paced by.

"Nope, doesn't count if you burn it off as you eat it. Sit down." Arizona insisted. Alice sighed loudly and sat down. As she nibbled at the fruit she became acutely aware of just how hungry she was. It took all she had not to give Arizona the satisfaction of wolfing down the sandwich. She feigned disinterest and pushed the plate away when the fruit was finished.

"There, happy?" Alice snapped.

"Nope. Fruit doesn't count as a meal, and I bet that's all you've eaten these past few weeks. Have the sandwich." Alice glanced at it suspiciously.

"What did you lace it with? I'm positive you guys have slipped something into it that will calm me down without giving me a high." Arizona shook her head.

"Not everyone has ulterior motives." She replied. "The sandwich is one hundred percent free of anything but a delicious combination of meat, cheese, lettuce, and condiments." She assured her. Alice stared at her for a moment.

"You'd better not be lying." She growled as her need to eat won over her tenacity and she reached for the sandwich. She finished almost the whole sandwich, save the bottom crust. Arizona glanced at the discarded bread in amusement.

"What? I've never liked the crust." Alice muttered sheepishly. All of the sudden she was overcome by a horrible wave of nausea and Arizona watched as she turned an alarming shade of green.

"Shit!" She blurted as she ran for the bathroom, slamming the door and locking it to keep the doctors out, before promptly puking her guts out. She heard the rush of footsteps and the chatter of voices. "Go away." She yelled. No such luck. She ignored them as she shoved away from the toilet and searched for the mouthwash.

"It's my fault. I should have recognized that her stomach wouldn't be able to handle so much food after weeks of nothing." Alice heard Callie say. She yanked open the door.

"Well thank you Callie. Was barfing my guts out supposed to teach me a lesson or something?" The girl snapped angrily. She was still breathing heavily from being sick. All three of the doctors were staring at her pityingly.

"Alice, I'm sorry. I should have known you wouldn't be able to handle the food." Callie apologized. Alice wasn't having any of it.

"Yeah, Ms. I-Know-Everything-Cause-I'm-A-Doctor should have known." She fired back. She had finally cooperated with what they wanted her to do, and she ended up with her head in the toilet. Some help they were.

"Alice, lay off." Jess said tiredly. Alice flipped her off before shoving past the huddle of doctors. "Can I at least go home?" She whined, sitting down on the couch.

"After that little stunt? No way in hell." Callie replied.

"I'm bored and restless and I _need_ my fix and I can't just sit around here and have all of this time to think or I will truly lose my mind. I would have actually gone for an honest to god run had a better opportunity not presented itself. I need a distraction from this compulsive need to get my pills." Alice pleaded with the doctors.

"We can't take you home, not yet. But how about we put a movie in to fill the time? Arizona suggested.

"Fine." Alice agreed reluctantly.

Arizona opted to skip the movie, instead hanging out in the kitchen. Callie tried to inconspicuously give Alice some space by claiming to keep her girlfriend company. Soon enough, only Alice and Jessica occupied the living room. The older of the two popped a movie in and sat on the opposite side of the couch from Alice, not wanting to be too pushy.

Alice tried to focus on the film, but ten minutes into it she found herself not any better than when she started the movie. She found a stack of newspapers from a few days ago and settled on tearing each sheet into tiny strips. Halfway through the movie she had demolished the paper, leaving a neat pile of shredded paper in its place. She could feel exhaustion taking over; the combination of the run, constant fighting, and emotional drain of the day left her extremely tired. She stretched out, scooting closer to where Jessica sat, and within five minutes she had collapsed with her head in the older woman's lap, dead to the world.

_**So….some of you are probably beginning to dislike Alice. But before you decide that you hate her, keep in mind, that as we learned from Amelia on PP, opiate addicts can be some of the nastiest bitches ever when they want their fix. Please review, it means a lot to us!**_


	27. Chapter 27

Alice woke up a few hours later to the sound of hushed conversation. A familiar perfume lingered in the air and a feeling of dread filled her as she recognized it as the Jo Malone scent that was distinctively Jessica's. She sat up slowly and her guess was confirmed. She had passed out on the devil shrink. "Fuck me." Alice muttered to herself in frustration.

"Sorry, brunettes aren't really my type." Jess replied.

Alice glared at her and shoved off of the couch. "Lexie called. She's swamped at the hospital, and won't be back for several hours. Luckily for me, Arizona and Callie booked the remainder of today and tomorrow off, so I get to go into work and deal with more crazy people." Jessica said.

"Whatever." Alice mumbled, rubbing the sleep from her eyes. It was then that she noticed her hands were shaking. A series of shakes suddenly shot through her and Jessica noticed.

"Wow. You must be hooked worse than we thought." She said.

"No shit!" Alice snapped. God, did she wish she was still asleep. Her cravings were 10 times stronger than when she had passed out.

"Alice, this is going to be really hard, maybe even harder than we thought. But you can do it, we're here for you." Jessica took the sarcasm out of her tone and tried to catch ahold of Alice's eye contact.

"I don't want to do it. I have no problem with being an addict. I'm fine when I'm on the pills. It doesn't hurt when I'm on them." Alice said in frustration. Jessica shook her head.

"That's the addiction speaking. What happens when we let you get worse and suddenly you can't get your hands on drugs? You already pulled a knife today Alice, what comes next?" Jessica reasoned. Alice shook her head. She could feel the knife resting in her pocket.

"What do you care? I don't even live with you." Alice snapped.

"I care because I'm not going to watch you throw your life away. And I don't want to see you or Lexie get hurt." Jessica told the girl.

Alice heard the surgeon's last sentence ringing around in her head. She was tired of hearing about how no one wants to see them get hurt. She had already been hurt. Why didn't they realize that? She wasn't on the pills for fun, or just peer pressure, or some shit like that. She was on them because they took the pain away.

"It's a little too late for that." Alice said. Her voice quavered with anger, frustration, need, and sadness.

"I'm fucking out of here." Alice said, making a break for the door. Jessica ran after her after sighing at the new escape attempt.

Alice was halfway out the door when Jessica grabbed her from behind. She fought frantically against the psychiatrist's hold, attempting to kick at her shins and claw at her arms.

"Let me go!" Alice kept her voice low as to not attract the attention of Callie or Arizona.

"Alice, give it up! You're not getting out of here." Jess said through gritted teeth. Alice managed to free her arm and she swiped the knife out of her pocket and flipped the blade free. She held it against Jessica's throat, and in an instant the tables had turned.

"Let me go." Alice repeated the order. This time, the psychiatrist listened. The instant that Alice turned for the door though, Jessica knocked it out of her hand and sent it flying across the hallway, leaving a huge chip in the paint.

"Goddamn, they're going to kill me for that." She muttered as she grabbed Alice firmly and hauled her back into the apartment.

"Just leave me alone! It isn't you fucking business what I do!" Alice's yelling filled the apartment. Her obsessive need for the drugs was interrupted as she realized the grave nature of the situation. She had just held a knife against someone's throat. She stopped fighting to run, and was now struggling to distance herself from Jessica in fear of what her desperation might lead her to do.

"Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god I... I nearly _killed_ you and it's all because I want my fix, I'm no better than _them_, I just tried to kill someone I wanted to kill you because you wouldn't let me leave and..." She rambled on, hyperventilating. By this time, Callie and Arizona had stumbled out from their room where they had been napping. They both jolted out of their stupor as they took in the knife, the disheveled hallway and a hyperventilating Alice.

"Again?" Arizona asked. Jessica nodded.

"I'll explain later. Just take her into the kitchen and try to get her to calm down before she passes out here." The psychiatrist advised. Arizona nodded and led Alice out of the room. As soon as she was out of ear shot, Callie turned to Jessica.

"What happened?" She gestured to the scattered magazines, plants , table and finally the knife. Jessica opened her mouth to answer when Callie noticed the paint. "My wall! What happened to my wall?!" She rushed over to examine the chipped, scratched paint.

"Alice tried to escape, again. Only this time, she got her knife and was able to hold it to my throat, so I let her go obviously. As soon as she turned, I knocked it out of her hand, and that's where it ended up. So sorry I damaged your wall, I was more concerned about my windpipe." The last sentence dripped with sarcasm. Callie stood with her jaw hanging.

"She tried to kill you?" She managed to recover enough to speak.

"The addict in her was desperate. The Alice you know isn't here. I misjudged just how hooked she really is. As soon as she realized that she could have very well killed me, she was able to think around her addiction, and that's when the hyperventilating started." Jessica tipped her head to the kitchen.

* * *

><p>Meanwhile in the kitchen, a very pale Alice was still hyperventilating. Arizona felt useful for the first time in hours. She was a bit out of her element with the violent addict, but if there was anyone who could calm a patient down and make them feel comfortable it was Arizona.<p>

"Alice. Alice, look at me." Arizona touched her shoulder and the teen focused her gaze on Arizona. "Shhh, calm down. Breathe normally. In, out. In, out." She instructed. Alice started to listen to her, and within a minute her breathing returned to normal.

"Good girl. Can you tell me what happened?" She asked gently.

"I... I almost killed her. I wanted to. I was so close to leaving and she stopped me again and the knife was _right there_ and it was like it acted on its own, it was on her neck before I could even think about it. I almost _killed_ a girl because I wanted some drugs. I'm a monster. I'm violent and uncontrollable and I'm a danger. To you, to Callie. To Lexie, and Mer, and Jessica. Everyone is in danger around me. I'm scared of myself."

Alice broke off of her little speech and glanced down at the counter. Again, her hands were shaking. "Look at this, I'm shaking and yelling and crazy. All for a pill. I haven't been able to think straight like this since the first hour of withdrawal. I don't want for it to have this power over me, but then the hooked side of me takes over and none of what the rational me wants matters." She reached for an abandoned spoon and twirled it, around and around on the counter because she was still unable to sit still. Arizona broke out into a smile.

"What are you grinning about?!" Alice snapped.

"You! This is such a breakthrough, and you don't see it. Four hours ago, you would have never been able to sit down and form a decent paragraph and feel remorse for your actions. Don't you see? You're already breaking away from the addict. It's getting better, not worse." She reassured the still semi-hysterical teen.

"I know you are honey. That's why we need to stop this." Arizona said comfortingly. Alice shook her head.

"It's too late. I almost killed her Arizona." Alice emphasized again, running a shaking hand through her hair.

"It's never too late Alice." Arizona replied. Alice didn't look convinced.

"Lexie's going to be fucking terrified of me. Everyone is, even you." The teenager lamented sadly.

"We're not scared Hun. We're doctors; we do this kind of thing all the time." Arizona said. Alice still didn't believe her.

"Whatever." Alice said in a low voice. She looked up as Jessica came into the room, followed by Callie.

"Hey, you okay?" Jessica asked softly, sitting down next to the distressed teenager. Alice stared at her in disbelief.

"No, I'm not ok. But right now, the last thing I need is to see the person that I nearly killed. So don't follow me." Alice pushed away from the counter and hopped off the barstool. Her footsteps echoed through the hall and a few moments later her door clicked shut.

"She's way more addicted than you thought." Arizona told Jess, who nodded.

"I know that now," Jessica glanced at her watch "Lex said she'd be back soon. But in the meantime, that girl needs to eat." The psychiatrist gestured to the fridge.

"Ha! You think she's actually going to take food again?" Callie stared at the redhead in disbelief.

"It's not a matter of choice! She needs food in her system." Jessica countered. The two tenacious girls glared at each other.

"Enough! The focus here is on Alice, not your disagreement over who you think is right." Arizona's sudden outburst snapped them both out of their stare down.

"Thank you. Now, what should she eat?" Callie shrugged and yanked the fridge open. She scanned the shelves, before grabbing a yogurt. "Here. This will be fine for now." She placed it on the counter and rummaged through a nearby drawer for a spoon.

Jessica grabbed the container and spoon and headed for the room. She didn't even bother knocking, instead just letting herself in. Alice whipped around at the sudden intrusion. "Unless you've got some drugs, you're the last person I want to see." She warned. Jessica rolled her eyes.

"Maybe you'll luck out and this batch of cows got some antibiotics, since this isn't organic." Jessica tossed the yogurt Alice's way. The teen caught it out of reflex but didn't make any attempts to open it.

"Eat, Alice. You can't live off of cheerios alone." The older woman said firmly.

"Nothing you can say will convince me. Just save your breath and leave." Alice growled.

"Suit yourself. Don't come crying to me when you've cracked your head open after passing out from lack of food." Jessica slammed the door, leaving Alice alone in her thoughts.

* * *

><p>Four hours passed. Alice's pacing continued the entire time. She could hear the front door opening and closing, and Lexie's voice filled the apartment. The three must have filled her in, because sure enough there was a knocking at the door a few minutes later.<p>

Alice's whole body filled with panic as she leapt off the bed in time to lock the door. She was just in time too, as one of the doctors attempted to let themselves in. Content that it would hold for now, she slid backwards on the floor and curled up so that she could rest her head on her knees.

"Alice? Come on, let us in." Lexie coaxed from the other side of the door. God, Alice felt sick. She couldn't even think about looking her in the eye.

"Just leave me alone Lex." Alice replied quietly. She scooted around to the other side of the bed and stared out the window, tracing random patterns on the floor with her hand.

"I'm not mad at you sweety. It wasn't your fault." Lexie called. Alice shook her head, but didn't reply.

A couple minutes passed, and a second set of footsteps sounded down the hall. There was a small click- Callie picking the lock- and the handle turned slowly. The door opened a few moments later.

"Hey." Lexie gave her a half smile. Alice continued to trace the hardwood, not bothering to even look her way. "Alice, don't shut me out like this." She said.

"Out." Was all the teen replied with. When Lexie ignored her request, she swiped the vase off of the desk and whipped it at the surgeons head. She missed by an inch. Seconds later, Jessica rushed into the room. She narrowed her eyes at Alice.

"Freak out on me, fine. But chuck a vase at Lexie's head? Unbelievable. Uncalled for, Alice." Her tone was full of reprimand.

"Fuck off, Jessica! Don't you see? As soon as you turned up in my life, things got _so_ much worse. Lexie and I were managing, and you had to go and fuck me up even more! This whole mess is your fault." She glanced at Lexie for the first time. "I hope you're happy. I told you to back off, and you force me to go and get 'help' from her. And it's done nothing but ruin me. So congratulations, your misguided attempts have only proven to do more damage. Leave me alone, all of you. Don't expect my forgiveness, either. Forcing me to get off of the drugs and clean my act up isn't right. What I do with my life is my choice. You don't get to make these decisions for me. You already did once, and look where that got you. Get out of here, Lexie. Now."

_**Sorry for the long wait guys. Stuffs been crazy! Please review!**_


	28. Chapter 28

For another two days, Alice stayed in the room, trapped in her misery. She ignored offers of food, only sipping at water. On the morning of the fourth day, thing started to improve. Her cravings were subdued significantly, and her appetite returned. She took a long shower in the en suite before rummaging around for some fresh clothes in the suitcase that Lexie had brought. When she felt that she was suitable presentable, she headed for the door.

Alice knew that she owed them an apology, but the thought of looking any of them in the eye right now was nearly unbearable. "Put your big girl pants on." She muttered to herself as she opened the door and wandered into the kitchen, where all four of the adults sat with mugs of coffee in hand.

"It lives." Jessica announced drily.

Alice managed a half smile. She put herself a piece of toast in the toaster before turning to address the adults. "I need to apologize, to all of you. Jessica in particular. I'm really sorry for my awful behavior these past few days. To say that I wasn't myself would be an understatement."

The four doctors in the room stared at the girl, speechless. She waited anxiously for a reply, became uncomfortable, and whirled around to flee from the kitchen when Callie stopped her.

"Alice! You're...back!" The Hispanic woman exclaimed. Alice laughed in relief as Callie brought her into a hug. The other doctors stood up as well.

Alice finally brought herself to face Lexie. Those damn Bambi eyes made her look away again.

"Alice...come here." Lexie said, pulling the teenager into a hug. Finally, Alice hugged her back. The teenager worked to keep back tears as she leaned back from the embrace.

"Told you she could do it." Jessica practically sang. Alice laughed a bit and then ran her fingers through her hair.

"So...what now?' The teenager asked.

* * *

><p>Two months passed, and slowly things were returning to some kind of normal. She moved back into the residents' house, and started taking classes online. She had caught up with her missed curriculum with ease, and was now farther ahead than students who attended school.<p>

"I'm doing a Starbucks run, does anyone want anything?" Alice shouted into the house. April dashed out of the kitchen and accepted the offer enthusiastically. Alex declined, but Lexie accepted. The remainder of the residents were at the hospital. She grabbed her wallet and jogged out the door. Picking up the pace and putting her headphones in, the run to the coffee shop was effortless.

"A tall skinny vanilla latte, a Grande whatever your bold of the day is and a tall nonfat mocha please," Alice ordered. She was just taking her card and stepping back when she bumped right into someone behind her.

Alice spun around. "Oh my god, I'm so sorry!" She winced at her own stupidity for not being more careful. The iced latte soaked girl grinned.

"Replace it for me and there'll be no hard feelings." She replied. Alice nodded. "For sure." She handed the card back over.

"Hey, I was kidding!" The girl giggled.

"I'm not!" Alice said as she took the receipt for the fourth drink.

"Well, thanks anyways then! I really appreciate it." The girl, who was about her age, smiled genuinely. Alice assessed her for a moment, but smiled back. What the hell, why not make a new friend?

Alice grabbed the coffees that were marked for her, and headed for a table. "Care to join me?" She offered. The girl nodded and slid into a chair. She gave the coffees an amused look.

"All for you?" She asked, a smile playing on her lips.

"What? Oh, no! Starbucks run for the house." She said as she reached for her mocha.

"Ahh. I'm Anna by the way." The girl introduced herself.

"Alice." She replied.

"So, are you new to here? I stop by here almost every morning on my run, but I've never seen you around." Anna reached for her drink.

"New to Seattle? No. But new to the area." Alice replied. A conversation flowed easily for the next few minutes, and the two found that they got along quite nicely.

"I'd better get going, before the two who are expecting these head out." Alice gestured to the coffee, reluctantly packing up. Anna smiled at her and reached for Alice's phone that was in her hand and clicked in her number. Her hand brushed against Alice's as she put the phone back in, and Alice nearly jumped out of her seat as the girl's hand brushed against hers. The contact was so innocent, but there was so much chemistry boiling between them that it was almost tangible.

"No worries. I've put my number in. Just text me your name. I'm sure this won't be the last time we meet." Anna stood up and walked with Alice out the door. When she realized that they were heading for different ways, she doubled back over to where Alice stood, getting her coffees sorted out for the walk back. "Give me a call and we'll go out on a real date soon." She whispered into Alice's ear. And with that, she stepped away and headed off down the street.

Alice headed down her respective way, wondering what the hell had just happened. Sure, girls were hot, but she had never really considered herself to be bi. Not until now anyways. She found herself wanting Anna like a puppy with a steak on the counter._ What the hell_, she thought to herself. New chapter, new experiences. She decided, promising herself to follow Anna up on her offer. She shook out of her train of thought as she pushed the door open with her foot. "I'm back." She called out into the house. Moments later, April and Lexie rushed towards her.

"Thanks so much!" April smiled at her and grabbed the coffee as she dashed out the door. Lexie managed to actually come to a complete stop as she gently plucked the cup from the teen's hands. "I'm sorry, I have to run!" She smiled apologetically. Alice shrugged. "No worries."

"Thanks again for the latte, you're the best!" The surgeon hugged her and then rushed out the door where an impatient April waited in the already running car.

* * *

><p>Alice breezed through her work for the day. Once finished, she sat on her bed, staring at her phone. She was contemplating whether or not it was too soon to text her. She shoved it away and went to the kitchen to get something to eat. Meredith was sitting with a mug of steaming coffee.<p>

"You're home at an odd hour." Alice noted, motioning to the clock that read 1 pm.

"I'm only back for a short while. What's new with you?" She asked.

"Huh?" Alice pulled her head out of the cupboard where she was hunting for food.

"What's new with you?" Meredith repeated.

"Inner turmoil, as usual. I met someone at Starbucks this morning. They gave me their number and said to text if I wanted to go out. Like, on a date. And I really want to text them, but I think I'll seem desperate if I send one the day of." Alice pouted over her bowl of cereal.

"Ah, boy troubles huh?" Meredith said, raising her eyebrows. It was nice to see Alice having normal teenage problems.

Alice laughed nervously and felt her heart speed up. Wait a second, should she let anyone know she was considering dating a girl? What would the residents think? Sure, they were fine with Arizona and Callie, but what if it was different with her? Alice knew she wouldn't be able to be with a guy. At least not yet. About a month ago, she had tried getting with Chip, just for old time's sake, and it hadn't worked out well.

_"So, do you want a drink or a bowl or anything-" Alice cut the stoner off. "Let's just do this." She said. She had had a rough past couple days. It was the one year anniversary of when she had gotten shot._

_Chip shrugged and he and Alice made their way to the couch. They were certainly comfortable around each other, and it didn't take long for her to pull off Chip's shirt and allow him to start taking her's off. It was when his hands brushed against her stomach on the way up that she froze. Her blood went cold and she worked on telling herself that it was just Chip. She had even warned him of the scars that marred her otherwise toned abdomen, which he had said didn't matter to him; she was still hot. But despite knowing he was harmless, she couldn't go on with it. Just being touched there by a guy brought back too many damn memories. _

_Chip had noticed her sudden lack of movement and pulled back. "Alice, you okay?" He asked, waving a hand in front of her otherwise blank face. She snapped out of it and looked at him apologetically. _

_"I'm sorry Chip. I can't do it." She said quietly, feeling bad for leading the boy on._

_"Is it because of the scars? Because I told you, you still look awesome." He said, sitting up on the couch. _

_"Not the scars...just where they came from. It's nothing personal." Alice attempted to explain._

_"Ahhh, it's okay. We can just hang out dude. I've got a bag hidden under my mattress...you wanna smoke?" He offered, giving her a forgiving smile. Alice hesitated before shaking her head. _

_"Sorry Chip, not tonight." Alice declined, standing up from the couch. He shrugged, but escorted her to the door._

_"Nice seeing you." The shaggy haired teen said, smiling a crooked smile. Alice returned it softly and left, still a bit shaken from the memories that had resurfaced._

"I say call him. He's probably waiting." Meredith's voice interrupted Alice's thoughts.

"Mmhm. Thanks, Mer." Alice said, signaling that she wanted to move on. Thankfully, the older girl took the hint and made small talk as Alice finished her cereal. As soon as she was done, she threw her dishes into the dishwasher and bounded up to her room, snatching her phone.

"_Are either of you guys home?"_ she texted Arizona. A few minutes later, her phone beeped.

"_Yeah, I am. What's up?"_ it read.

"_I need to ask you something. Mind if I pop over?"_ she replied.

"_Not at all"_ her phone showed. Satisfied, Alice grabbed her purse and trotted down the stairs. "I'm going to go see Arizona." She told Meredith.

"Sure. Want a drive? I'm going to the hospital anyways, and her place is on the way." Meredith offered.

"That'd be great!" Alice smiled gratefully.

* * *

><p>Once in the apartment, Arizona offered her some coffee or tea, which she both declined. She grabbed an apple from a bowl in the counter and went to sit in the living room. Arizona joined her on the couch a minute later.<p>

"So. What's up?" The blonde asked, looking at the teen expectantly. Alice decided not to beat around the bush.

"I got asked out on a date today, by a girl. And I think I just may take her up on her offer." Alice busied herself with the apple, rather nervous for the older girl's response.

"Alice, that's awesome!" Arizona smiled at her.

"You don't think it's...weird? I mean, I was with Chip for a while, but after that second time that my dad beat me up, I'm too anxious around him. Scares me to be around him a bit." She chewed her lip. Arizona was the first person she had admitted this to.

"Alice, of course it's not weird. Sometimes we fall for the person, not the gender. It's totally normal. And if being around her makes you more comfortable than being around Chip, this is an awesome opportunity to get back together with someone, especially when you are already initially more comfortable around them." Arizona assured her.

"But...but what if Lexie gets mad?" Alice asked uncertainly. She hated seeming so clueless, but she honestly had no idea what she was doing.

"Alice, trust me; no one's going to get mad at you. You don't even have to tell her until you're comfortable." Arizona comforted the teen. Alice nodded and then pulled out her phone. She scrolled to her contacts until she found Anna's name, and then took a deep breath before typing a message.

"Did you just text her?" Arizona said, smiling knowingly. Alice nodded and blushed. Since when did Alice blush?

"So what's she like?" The blonde doctor asked.

"Well, her name's Anna. She's gorgeous and we don't seem to run out of things to talk about. And, I don't know, the way she flirts and stuff, it's just so like….'I want you'...you know?' Alice struggled with her words, but Arizona nodded understandingly.

They fell into silence for a few seconds. They both jumped when her phone beeped. Alice regarded it as though it might explode. "I can't look." She shoved it away. Arizona picked it up.

"Tomorrow night. Dinner at Piccolino's maybe? Lemme know." She read out loud. "Girl's got a good taste in food." Arizona clicked in a reply before Alice could stop her. "You're meeting her at the restaurant at seven. You're welcome." She tossed the phone in the stunned teen's direction.

"But...but what do I tell Lexie?" Alice asked frantically. Her heart was racing, and she knew she was going to be on edge until the date.

"Relax, I'll tell her you're coming to hang with me and Callie. It'll be fine." Arizona assured the now panicked teen.

"Forget it, I'm cancelling." Alice swiped for her phone, but Arizona held it out of reach. "Give it back!" Alice huffed.

"Nope. You're not chickening out on her. Not fair." Arizona replied.

"Arizona, give me the phone." Alice nearly growled, narrowing her eyes. Arizona watched as the 'darker' Alice threatened to take over, but she held her ground. Alice shook her head and snapped out of it.

"Seriously, give it back." Her tone was more reasonable. "No bailing." Arizona reminded her as she gave her the cell back.

Alice spent a bit longer with Arizona, mostly grilling her on what to expect. When she felt sufficiently prepared for the date the following night, she headed back to the residents house so she didn't arise any suspicions. Lexie was waiting when she got back. "Where were you?" She asked, trying not to sound too accusatory.

"With Arizona. Call her if you don't believe me." Alice replied.

Lexie studied Alice carefully. The teen seemed worried, no, more like on edge. Before the surgeon could ask about it, Alex came in.

"Hey kid, we're playing 21, you in?" He asked, gnawing on a couple of pretzel sticks. Alice nodded and hurried past Lexie into the living room.

Alice took the only open seat on the couch next to Mark, and smiled at him. He returned the favor and dealt her in. Lexie came in as well, and sat on the floor, leaning against Mark's leg.

* * *

><p>An hour later, Alice had cleaned everyone out and was making her way with her winnings upstairs. Alex threw pretzel sticks at her, and then laughed in surprise when she caught one in her mouth.<p>

Alice had been thankful for the distraction, but now was in full panic mode. An unsettling thought popped into her mind and she groaned. What was she going to wear?

Alice whipped out her phone and started dialing Arizona's number. A few digits in, she stopped herself. It was late, and she knew the blonde doctor needed her sleep. She'd ask her first thing tomorrow. Different clothing combinations racing through her head, Alice sprawled out on her bed and attempted sleep. Finally, it came to her and she dozed off.

* * *

><p>The next day, Alice woke up and immediately felt her stomach twist when she remembered what she was doing that evening. Jumping out of bed, she raced to the mirror, expecting something like a massive breakout of acne or something. But, her face was clear of blemishes and anything else that would inhibit her date.<p>

She holed herself up in her room, going through several different possibilities. It wasn't an overly posh restaurant, but she wanted to look nice for the first date. Lexie came in an hour later and took in the disaster zone that was Alice's room. "What on earth are you doing?" She asked.

"Uhm, going out with a friend for dinner tomorrow. Not sure what to wear, it's Piccolino's, but I've never been." Alice lied. Lexie seemed to buy it.

"Ahh. Those jeans will totally work. What have you got for a dressyish top?" She asked.

Alice thought for a moment before rooting though the mountain on her bed. "Aha! What about this?" She asked, triumphantly holding up a cream colored blouse with ruffles and black buttons down the middle.

"Perfect. Flats, or heels?" Lexie asked.

"Flats, for sure." The teen replied. They spent a bit longer sorting through Alice's belongings until they were satisfied with the outfit. Alice went to bed feeling slightly more comfortable with tomorrow now that she had everything sorted out.

* * *

><p>Four pm rolled around the next day, and Alice headed for Arizona and Callie's. Arizona had promised to help her get ready. She was buzzed in and she brought her rather large bag onto the elevator, turning a few heads. <em>What a change, <em>Alice thought. A few months ago, she had been turning heads for her irrational, drug-deprived frenzy. She stepped off into the hallway and made her way to the apartment. Callie let her in.

"Oh, hey..." Alice had assumed that Arizona would be alone. She had no idea how much Arizona had told her about her plans for tonight. If Callie noticed Alice's hesitation, she didn't show it. "She's in our room." She smiled encouragingly. Alice headed into the master suite, where Arizona sat on the couch by the window.

"Hey!" She flashed Alice one of her infectious super magic smiles, and Alice couldn't help but to return the grin. "How about we get you ready and then hang out for a bit?" She suggested. The teen nodded in agreement.

"Do you mind?" Alice hovered her bag over the neatly made bed.

"Not at all." Came the blonde's reply.

Alice dumped the contents onto the duvet. "So, who is she?" Callie asked. Alice nearly jumped out of her skin at the sudden voice.

"You told her?!" The teen whipped around and glared at Arizona.

"Relax, she's not going to repeat it to anyone. What was I supposed to tell her when she wanted to know why you weren't getting ready with Lexie?" Arizona shot back. Alice looked away.

"Fine. Just don't repeat this yet." She mumbled.

"'Course not." Callie replied.

"Does this look okay?" Alice sounded doubtful as the other two looked over the outfit.

"Perfect. The jeans make it casual, but the shirt says you tried. Whaa, what's with the matching lace bra and panties?" Arizona raised an eyebrow.

"Gotta be prepared. Not planning on sleeping with her tonight though, if that's what you're implying. Believe it or not, I do have standards." Alice replied.

"Hmm. Get changed, we'll leave." Callie said.

"No, don't bother, I don't care. I can't even count the amount of times you guys have cut my bloody clothes off anyways." Alice pointed out. The two shrugged and stuck around. Alice tossed her clothes off and pulled on the new pair of panties and bra. She reached for her blouse.

"Hold up." Arizona said. Alice glanced at her questioningly. The surgeon stepped over the heap of clothing and came closer to the girl. "Have you been cutting again?" She asked, looking at the fresh knicks on her already scarred stomach.

"No." Alice replied a bit too quickly. She shifted to hide the cuts on her inner thigh. The action wasn't unnoticed.

"Alice," Arizona warned. The teen rolled her eyes. "Don't make this a big deal. Just let me look at them." The paeds surgeon in her kicked in, and she wasn't about to let this just slide. Callie watched on in surprise as Alice appeared to comply. She scooched onto the bed and sat down, but kept her thighs together and tucked her feet under her.

"C'mon, don't be so difficult." Arizona told her. Alice hoped that her unwillingness was interpreted as being stubborn, rather than the panic that she was fighting at the thought of being touched there; being so exposed and at the mercy of someone else.

"I'm late. Bug me about it later." She tried to brush it off. "You don't have to leave for an hour and a half. You can spare two minutes for this." Arizona replied. Alice shook her head adamantly.

"I'm not going to hurt you, you know that. Just let me check them out for a moment." She reasoned. Alice sighed heavily, realizing that Arizona wasn't going to let this go until she got her way. She slowly brought her legs out from under her, but still pressed them together.

"Cal, can you please keep Alice there for a second?" Arizona asked as she slipped as she disappeared into the adjoining bathroom. The water ran for a bit and she reappeared a few moments later, supplies in hand. She tossed the package of antiseptic wipes and tube of Polysporin onto the bed. "Thanks." She smiled at Callie and they traded places. Alice sat stalk still as Arizona quickly cleaned off the pair of cuts on her stomach.

"I know you're not a fan of this, but it's better to get them fixed up now to avoid problems later on. Scars are sexy, but infections aren't." Alice nodded stiffly.

"Done with these. Now, let me deal with those other ones." Arizona said.

"Please leave it alone." Alice whispered. Callie, who bore a frustrated look, softened. The teen's genuine fear and vulnerability tugged at her heartstrings.

"I can't even imagine how scary the memories are that this brings back. But these cuts will be so much better off if I can just clean them up, ok?" Arizona asked, gently pushing on Alice's shoulder until she was flat out on the duvet. Alice's trembling was much worse as soon as Arizona's hand made contact with her leg. She hadn't allowed anyone to touch her legs, much less her inner thighs where wounds both old and new were, ever since that sickening first night of the attack. Arizona gently pushed her legs apart, examing the cuts that Alice had made. They were in pairs, all of the self-inflicted wounds were.

Alice battled against the flood of flashbacks. Arizona continued to talk. Mostly conversational, but occasionally reassuring the frightened teen. Alice found it somewhat helpful, and she was able to get a grip on herself instead of blindly panicking.

"All done." Arizona announced. Alice heaved a sigh of relief as Arizona placed a band aid on and then pulled her hands away. Alice exhaled shakily as she sat up.

"You alright?" Arizona sounded concerned. "Eventually. If you think that reaction was bad, you'd be shocked to see me lose it." Alice smiled grimly. "Not pretty." She reached for her shirt and pulled it on.

"You really should try not to cut yourself." Callie spoke up.

"Old habits die hard I guess." Alice replied. "I know, I'm not out of the woods for the peachy conversation that is sure to ensue about this, but let me at least get ready first." She continued. The adults agreed to back off until she was date-ready. This didn't take long, considering Alice had already planned her outfit and didn't need a lot of makeup to highlight her naturally stunning features. Soon enough, she was ready. The clock only read 6:00.

"Damn." Alice muttered as she saw the time. She was hoping that she could have gotten out of the 'cutting yourself is bad, you need more help' lecture. She sat on the couch in the living room. They joined her on either side.

"So when did this start up again?" Arizona asked. Alice sighed, but knew it would be easier to oblige.

"After the thing with Chip." The blonde doctor nodded understandingly, while Callie looked confused. "What thing with Chip?" She asked, remembering how Lexie had described the stoner. She raised an eyebrow and Arizona gave her a warning look.

"Chip and I were going to hook up, but I couldn't do it. It's just, he's a guy and even though I know he's not going to hurt me, I still don't like being touched by guys, especially where the scars are." Alice explained.

"You know cutting yourself isn't going to help that Alice. So why do you do it?" Arizona questioned. She got a shrug in response.

"Does Lexie know?" Callie asked next. Alice smirked.

"Do you think I'd be allowed out of the house if she did? Lexie's got this image in her head that I'm all better, and I like to keep it that way. Takes the stress off of her and keeps us from fighting." Alice explained. Both of the doctors next to her frowned.

"So you don't really tell her anything?" Callie asked in surprise. She had figured that the two were closer than ever since Alice had gotten off of drugs.

"Not really. Like if something was really wrong I would. But she doesn't need to be worrying about it." Alice replied.

"Please don't tell Lexie." She said softly.

Callie raised her eyebrows. "She should know. You need help still. How long has it been since you've seen Jessica for a session?" She asked. Alice thought for a moment.

"A couple weeks." She fudged the number. In actuality, it had been a month. Truth be told, she was starting to get her bearings and be comfortable again. She didn't want Jessica to ruin that.

"You need to go back to your weekly sessions." Arizona offered.

"Hmm." Alice replied non-commitally.

"I'm serious. That's the deal. If you don't want me to tell Lexie about this here's the deal. You go back to Jess. You also let me or Callie check for cuts, and fix them if necessary, whenever we ask." She looked questioningly at the teen.

"Fine. Lexie doesn't hear about this then. I have to go; I'm late for the bus." She muttered and pushed off the couch, hurrying out of the apartment.

_Hey guys, please review and we'll try to have another update up soon! Thanks! _


	29. Chapter 29

Alice grabbed her purse on the way out and then shut the door behind her. She made sure to slam it a bit for good measure. As she started down the hall, she heard the door open behind her. Sighing, she stopped as Arizona called her name.

"What?" Alice asked, not turning around.

"Alice...go get her." Arizona said encouragingly. Alice didn't have to turn around to know that she was using a super magic smile, because she felt the corners of her own mouth turning upwards.

"Thanks." Alice said, starting forward again. She focused her mind on the task at hand; her super terrifying date.

Alice hurried out of the apartment building to the bus stop. She arrived just in time to catch the bus. She climbed on, handed the bus driver the fare, and then sat in the back. She had 4 stops until she got up, giving her plenty of time to battle with her inner panic.

As Alice's stop drew nearer and nearer, she felt her heart begin to race. What if Anna didn't want someone who had never been with a girl before? Or what if Alice's past was too dark for her. Not to mention she'd pretty much have to explain everything due to the scars all over her body.

Finally, the bus stopped outside of the restaurant and opened its doors. Alice got up from her seat and exited the bus, stepping down onto the street. She took a deep breath and walked through the doors, into the restaurant.

Anna was waiting just inside the doors. "Hey!" She smiled at her. "They've got a table ready for us." Anna told her. "Awesome." Alice cringed inwardly. Awesome? So riviting it was unreal. She cursed her nerves.

They sat down and ordered drinks and starters. Anna struck up the conversation. "So, where do you go to school?" She asked.

"Uhm, I used to go to Cardinal Carters, but I've been taking online classes. Grade 10 stuff. You?" She scrambled to avoid any questions that would lead to the reason why she wasn't in school.

"I've been wanting to take classes online, but my parents insist I stay in public school." Anna replied, rolling her eyes. Alice chuckled.

"Listen, Anna, I'm going to be honest about this. I've never dated a girl. Hell, I've never even thought about it." Alice admitted, also keeping the conversation from questions that could force her to admit anything about her past.

"Well there's a first time for everything right? I'm just happy I got to you before any of the other girls did." Anna smiled. Alice sighed and felt herself start to relax. This wasn't nearly as stressful as she thought it was going to be.

"Me too. Even though I didn't exactly make the smoothest first impression. I mean, dumping coffee on someone isn't normally how I flirt." Alice said, feeling her stomach flip when Anna's laugh rang out in the full restaurant.

"So it wasn't part of your master plan to get my number?" Anna asked, taking a sip of her drink, which the waiter had just brought.

"Sadly, no. It was just me being a klutz." Alice replied, chuckling a bit.

"Well, you're a pretty damn sexy klutz, I must say." Anna said, causing Alice to nearly choke when she took a drink.

"Is that so?" Alice asked, after recovering. Anna nodded and winked.

Soon, their waiter returned to take their orders, and both girls filled the waiting time with casual conversation. Alice found herself to be the most comfortable she had felt in a very long time. Her father, the scars, Lexie, everything was off of her mind. The food was great, she was at ease, and Anna was...amazing. Finally, the two girls finished their dinner and the check came. Anna insisted on paying, and though Alice protested, she secretly found it adorable.

Eventually, the two girls made their way out of the restaurant and stood on the sidewalk. Alice could see Arizona and Callie's car across the parking lot, and knew she would have to leave soon. Sighing, she turned back to Anna and smiled. Before she knew what was happening, her lips found themselves pressed against Anna's with her hands wrapped around her. Alice felt the other girl's hand caress her cheek and surprisingly found that the contact felt good.

The kiss ended, and both girls leaned back. Alice struggled to catch her breath and Anna smiled. "I'll text you later." The teenager told her, giving her a peck on the cheek before walking away. Alice took a couple seconds to collect herself before starting towards Callie and Arizona's car.

"You kissed her?!" Callie exclaimed as Alice got into the car. Alice looked at her in shock, surprised that she had been seen.

"Yesssss." Alice hissed, embarrassed. The two adults in the front seat giggled.

"So it went good I take it?" Arizona asked as she started the car and pulled out of the parking lot. Alice couldn't help but smile as she nodded.

"I assume there's going to be a second date?" Callie raised an eyebrow and looked in the rearview mirror.

"There better be." Alice replied.

"Judging by the way you two were macking on each other, I'm pretty sure date numero dos will be coming up pretty damn fast." Callie laughed, making Alice blush again.

The car soon arrived at the resident's house and Alice started getting out of the car when Arizona stopped her. The teenager turned to look at her curiously.

"I called Jessica and told her the circumstances. She isn't going to tell Lexie anything. But she did call her while you were on your date and said she'd like to see you. So Lexie scheduled you with her tomorrow." The blonde surgeon said. Alice's face fell, but she nodded.

"Thank you both, for the help." Alice said, before getting out of the car. The two women in the front seats nodded and waved as they pulled away from the curb and drove off.

Alice walked up the porch stairs and entered the house, gripping the bag she had taken her clothes in. She jogged upstairs, finding that her mood had been slightly ruined by the thought of a therapy session tomorrow.

* * *

><p>Alice readied herself for the session early that next morning, however begrudgingly. She would go to avoid a fight with Lexie, but she was not in the mood to talk. She was on cloud nine. Her life was finally settling down, and she felt that she no longer needed the help that the psychiatrist so often tried to force on her. She stalled in the atrium, making sure to arrive at the appointment ten minutes late despite Lexie getting to the hospital on time. At 9:10 on the dot, she sauntered in through the open door, latte in hand.<p>

Jessica looked up. Annoyance crossed her face and she started to stand up. Alice waved her off. "Don't bother. This won't take long. I simply came to let you know that these _sessions_," a look that was a mixture of disgust and contempt crossed her face as she spoke the word bitterly "are done. I don't need you anymore. If you have a problem with this, I'm sure that you can whine about it to Lexie. Oh, no wait. She's too busy being a real doctor as opposed to dividing her time between spouting off bullshit to her desperate patients and doing Starbucks runs. Cheers." Alice said drily, holding up her latte and then spinning on her heal before heading back out of the office, leaving the psychiatrist speechless for once. She slipped into an elevator and hit the close button before Jessica could catch up to her. She leaned against the wall and gave a self-assured smile. Oh yes, she was back and better than ever.

Jessica swore as the elevator door closed. She dodged around a nurse before opening the door that led to the stair well. The psychiatrist sped down the stairs, knowing Alice would be heading towards the main floor.

Alice sighed as the elevator stopped for the second time to let more passengers on. All she wanted was to get out of the damn hospital and enjoy her day. Finally, the doors opened on her floor and she stepped out.

Jessica burst out of the stair well, breathing heavily, just as the elevator opened. She spotted Alice walking out and grabbed her by the arm.

"Jessica, just let me go. There's nothing more you need to do for me." Alice said, almost pleadingly.

"You know there are things I need to help you with." Jessica hissed. Alice's mood darkened.

"I don't need your fucking help." Alice growled, wrenching her arm free.

Jessica yanked Alice back and put a hand to her stomach. The girl gasped and stared at her in shock. Jessica could feel the bandages under her shirt.

"This," Jessica nearly whispered as she put pressure on Alice's abdomen, "this is why you need my help. And if you don't get the hell back into my office, so help me I'll drag you right into Lexie's OR and make you tell her what you're doing straight to her face."

"Good. Cause you aren't going to win this battle, not today. I'm _fine_. I feel fine, I don't need this today. After everything that has happened, after losing complete control over my life, I have earned the right to make a decision for myself. So today, I'm not coming. And I probably won't be back for weeks, months even. Threaten all you'd like but it won't change my decision. You are a therapist. By law you have no right to force me to do anything. And get your fucking hand off of me. I'm not going to ask twice." Alice glared harshly at her until she withdrew her contact. Alice stepped back and walked out of the hospital, and all Jessica could do was stand and watch because all of what the teen had just said was true.

* * *

><p>Now that Alice was out of the hospital, she wasn't quite sure with what to do with herself. It was then that her phone buzzed. She pulled it out of her pocket as she headed down the sidewalk, away from the large building she had just come out of. Anna's name popped up on the screen on her phone and Alice couldn't help but smile. She opened the text, which read: <em>hey beautiful. Whatcha doing?<em>

Alice quickly typed a reply as she dodged pedestrians on the street_. Not much, walking around town. You? :)_

It only took a minute for Anna to reply; _I'm on lunch break at school. You should stop by_. Well, now Alice knew what she was doing for the next hour or so. She took the next right and started towards Anna's school.

It took Alice about fifteen minutes to jog to Anna's school. Most of the students were outside, enjoying the sunny day. Alice caught sight of Anna at one of the tables and hurried over to it. She was greeted with a hug and a light kiss, which made her stomach flip.

"Hey." Alice smiled, sitting down next to Anna, who put a hand on her leg.

"Hi. How'd you get here so fast, I didn't see you get dropped off?" The other teenager asked. Alice struggled to think of an answer that wouldn't lead to more explaining.

"I was already nearby when you texted, so I just jogged over." Alice said, hoping she wouldn't be asked where she was. To her relief, she wasn't.

"I see. I only have 15 minutes left, so we won't really get to hang out long." Anna said regretfully, glancing at the clock on her phone.

"Well then maybe we should plan another date if we want to hang out more." Alice winked. Anna chuckled and leaned her head on the other girl's shoulder. Alice found herself more than alright with the contact. In fact, she liked it. A lot.

The next fifteen minutes passed quickly as Alice and Anna planned to go to a movie on Friday. When the bell rang from inside the school, Alice was caught off guard with another kiss before Anna hurried away, into the school building. Alice smiled to herself and started back towards the sidewalk. Just as her feet hit the pavement, her cellphone rang. Alice sighed when she saw it was Arizona.

She promptly hit the ignore button. The phone started ringing again. She ignored two more calls before answering it out of annoyance. "What is it, Arizona?" She snapped.

"Uh, where are you? I was supposed to give you a lift from the hospital like ten minutes ago, remember?" Alice cursed under her breath. She had completely forgotten.

"Uhh, I got caught up in something. I'll be there soon." She hit call end and started in the direction of Seattle Grace, this time sprinting.

She made it back to the hospital in record time, slowing to a walk as she approached Arizona so she wouldn't be so suspicious. Alice realized it was a moot point; Arizona knew about her ditching Jess, she could tell by the look on her face. She was so busted.

"So, where were you actually?" The older blonde wasted no time.

"With Anna. I have my reasons for leaving." Alice replied defensively.

"Yeah, Jessica told me about your 'reasons'." Arizona said.

"Do what you'd like. I however would like to reserve a seat and bring some popcorn when you tell Lexie what you did. Speaking of, when are you going to come out about Anna?" Arizona asked. Alice shrugged.

"Soon, I guess. At least I'll have an explanation of where I went after." She replied

"Well, I guess I should get it over with." Alice said, starting into the hospital. Arizona frowned and hurried after her.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa. I didn't mean you had to do it right this instant." The blonde doctor said. Alice shrugged but stopped walking.

"What time does her shift end?" The teenager asked, following Arizona out to her car.

"I don't know. It's a long one, I think." Alice said as she stepped into the little BMW. "Lexie's place, or mine?" Arizona interrupted her.

"Lexie's, please. I've got some schoolwork to catch up on." Alice pulled a face.

"Ha, wait until you have to do paperwork. Paperwork is worse than school stuff, I guarantee it." It was Arizona's turn to make a face.

The car ride was silent for a few minutes. Finally, Alice spoke up. "How...how do I tell her?" She asked uncertainly.

"Tell her about the cutting or Anna?" Arizona asked.

"Both." Alice replied quietly. Arizona thought for a couple of seconds before she answered.

"I say, tell her about Anna first, because after you tell her about your cutting, you're both going to be pretty emotional. Just say 'Lexie...I've been dating someone and that someone is a girl', or something along those lines." Arizona suggested. Alice nodded.

"And the cutting?" The teenager said, turning to look out the window.

"As for that, you're going to figure out how you want to say it. I can't tell you how to tell her that." Arizona replied.

"Yeah well we can't all be perfect kid savin', wheelie rockin' angels in scrubs Arizona. I'm trying here." Alice retorted. Arizona's reproachful look disappeared. Alice hopped out of the now still vehicle, leaving Arizona in her silence. Alice let herself into the house.

"Hey, I'm back." She called out to no one in particular. Alex answered from somewhere upstairs. Both the time on the wall and the empty void in Alice's stomach informed her that it was lunchtime. She threw together a sandwich and glanced wistfully at the TV before heading with her lunch to her room to finish the schoolwork that she had put off. The seemingly endless projects took nearly six hours to finish, but alas Alice switched her computer off and shoved away from her desk, brain fried.

She sank down onto her bed and sighed with relief. The endless pile of work was finished. Her mind drifted off to thoughts of Anna, but her daydreaming was soon interrupted by the sound of the door opening. Lexie was home, and it was time to tell her. Alice's stomach churned with nerves. She couldn't decide if the confession about cutting, or coming out was making her feel this way. She reluctantly got off of her bed and left the safety of her bedroom and headed down the stairs.

"Hey." Alice said softly when she saw Lexie. The surgeon glanced over at her, and Alice watched as her face shifted into a mask of frustration and resignation.

"Hi. I heard from a less than pleased Jessica that you ditched your session earlier today." Lexie's tone was not amused. Alice glared at her, and then gave a sidelong glance at April who was in the kitchen. She didn't exactly feel like having a battle in front of someone else.

"Then I assume she also told you my reasons for doing so, which by the way are completely valid, so I don't expect to get a hassle over this. Drop it Lexie. I'm right this time." Alice replied firmly. The older girl gave her a look of disbelief before turning around and striding out of the kitchen.

_Perfect_, Alice thought_, just how this night should start_. She glanced over at April who was shaking her head. "Oh, don't even go there. I'm right." Alice rolled her eyes and snagged a carrot stick off of her plate as she passed, leaving April to protest to the wall.

"Lexie. Lexie!" Alice hurried after her and up the stairs.

"What now, Alice?" She sounded hassled.

"I left because I'm taking back the control over my life. I'm done with drinking, I'm done with drugs. I don't need someone dictating what I do, and uncovering the past that I'm trying to move on from week after week." Alice watched as Lexie's look softened. She couldn't argue with reason. "You know I'm right on this. So support me on it. Just because I'm not falling apart anymore doesn't mean I don't need you."

Lexie nodded. "Fine. Just be sure of what you're doing, alright?" Lexie responded.

"Absolutely." The teen nodded vigorously. "Since we're on the topic of changes and being in control of my own decisions, I have something else I need to say." Alice chewed nervously on her lip. Lexie looked at her warily.

"Alright, um, holy shit I don't know how to say this. Okay...I've been seeing someone lately. And that someone...and her name is Anna." Alice stumbled through, feeling her heart beat rise. She waited anxiously for a reaction.

"Oh! Well, that's a new one. I've got to say, I thought you were all for the shaggy stoners..." Lexie teased. Alice stuck her tongue out and swatted at her.

"Please. I'm so over Chip. Besides, it turns out guys aren't half the kissers, or the company, as the girls." Alice added in a sudden burst of confidence that was brought on by Lexie's causal acceptance.

"I will back that one up one hundred percent." Callie appeared at the bottom of the staircase. "Appetizers are ready." She added with a wink and then headed to the kitchen.

Lexie and Alice both made their way toward the kitchen, smelling the delicious aroma that the food gave off. Arizona and Callie were some of the best cooks they knew, and it was always nice to not have to worry about dinner for once. Lexie and Alice sat beside each other at the table and Callie and Arizona joined them soon, with plates of good looking food.

Alice was at ease for half of the dinner, joining in on the conversations and honestly enjoying herself. But about halfway through, she remembered that she still had to tell Lexie about the cutting. Suddenly, her appetite was gone, but she continued eating solely on the fact she didn't want Lexie to think something was wrong.

Alice made eye contact with Arizona, who was looking at her almost sympathetically. Alice suddenly put down her fork and knife, then opened her mouth. "Lexie, there's something else I need to tell you." Alice blurted out. Arizona and Callie both shot her surprised looks.

"Okay? Um, do you want to go somewhere more private?" Lexie asked, not liking tone in Alice's voice.

"Actually, Arizona and Callie already know." Alice admitted, refusing to look at either of the adults.

"They do?" Lexie's eyebrows rose as she looked back and forth between Callie and Arizona, who both nodded.

"Lexie, I've been cutting again." Alice forced out. The doctor's eyes rose and she glanced at the other two doctors.

"Upstairs, _now_." Lexie kept her voice low as she stood up from the table. Alice felt her heart jump, but she reluctantly followed Lexie out of the kitchen and up the stairs. Arizona and Callie exchanged worried looks.  
>Alice heard Lexie slam the door behind her, and then forced herself to turn around.<p>

"Why didn't you tell me first? And sooner!" It was obvious that Lexie was ticked. Alice struggled to answer.

"I didn't mean for them to find out. Arizona saw the cuts when I went over there before I went out to dinner that one night." She replied. Lexie didn't seem any less mad.

"If you're still struggling with this, then you had no right to walk out on Jessica." So that's why Lexie was so pissed.

"Look, Lexie. I came to you for help, not to get yelled at!" Alice said, starting to turn back to the stairs.

"You want help? Go back to Jessica! This is exactly why you needed her in the first place! I can help you some, but she's is the one to go for this!" Lexie's voice rose in frustration.

"It's not that easy Lexie! It's not some magic fix! You don't understand self-harm if you think that a few therapy sessions is the solution!" Lexie's eyes darkened.

"I understand all right. You're making the conscious decision to damage your body every time you pick up the knife! No one is forcing you to do this! Just _stop_ for god's sake!" Lexie's voice was now a shout.

"No, Lexie! It's not that simple! You know what, screw this. I trusted you not to flip out, and you've done just that! Why is it that you're the only one who can't be reasonable about this?!" Alice matched her tone. Their voices carried out through the entire house.

"Because this isn't something you can reason and deal with! It can't happen!" She shot back. Alice threw her hands up in frustration.

"Fine! If you can't deal with it, I'll find someone else who can." Alice's voice was venomous. She stormed out of the room and down the stairs, out to the porch. The voices of the talking adults were audible, but not clear to Alice. A few minutes later, Callie came out and sat on the porch step beside the teenage girl. "Pack your bags." She said quietly.

"What?" Alice asked in disbelief.

"You heard me. You're going to come stay with us for a few nights, until things cool off." Alice nodded.

"Thanks." She murmured and quickly headed inside to gather her stuff.

Alice got up from the porch step and went back into the house. She hurried up the stairs and grabbed the duffel bag she always kept under her bed. In a couple of minutes, Alice had packed everything she needed and walked quickly down the stairs. She came face to face with Lexie.

Alice averted her gaze from Lexie's angry one and waited for the woman to say something. But the doctor just shook her head and walked away. Alice bit back tears and walked out the door, slamming it behind her.

Alice sat in the car silently watching the porch. The door opened and Callie and Arizona stepped out. Lexie was standing in the doorway. They were talking, but she couldn't make out the muffled voices. They conversed for another ten minutes before Lexie gave a little wave and closed the door. Alice quickly tried to brush away the tears that she had finally allowed to fall.

"You okay?" Callie asked, getting in the driver's seat. She turned around to look at the teenager. Alice simply shrugged and kept her gaze locked on the floor.

"Alice, it'll be okay." Arizona assured her, looking in the rearview mirror. Alice didn't reply.  
>Callie turned around and started the car, pulling away from the curb quickly. She knew Alice would just want to get to the apartment and be alone, but had something else in mind. She knew Alice wouldn't exactly be stable after what had happened. They would need to keep their eye on her, at least until she went to bed.<p>

The car arrived at Callie and Arizona's apartment complex and came to a stop. Alice was the first one out of the car, slinging her bag over her shoulder as she walked. Both doctors hurried after her.  
>Alice kept her pace quick and stopped outside of the doctors' door several moments before Callie and Arizona did. She waited for them to unlock the door and then slipped in. The teenager made a bee-line towards the guest room before Callie stopped her.<p>

Alice turned around at the calling of her name and looked at Callie tiredly. Her eyes were red, but she had managed to wipe her face of emotion.

"What?" Alice's voice cracked as she waited for an explanation.

"Don't shut yourself in. We're not going to ask you to talk or anything, just come out and sit with us. We'll put in a movie or something." Callie said, hoping the teen would oblige. Surprisingly, Alice dropped her bag on the floor and nodded.

"Doesn't matter what movie, you guys can pick." She mumbled from within the cupboard where she was searching for the chocolate chips. She could hear the two adults bickering over the movie choice. She found the bag of chocolate long before they decided, but hid in the cupboard to avoid being the swing vote. As she shifted buckets and boxes back into their respectful places, she noticed that there were some bottles in the back. Alice pushed the sugar and flour aside, and smiled at what she saw. Several bottles of liquor lined the back of the cabinet, including Alice's personal favorite; tequila- a learned habit from Lexie. She quickly re-arranged the items to hide her find, making a mental note of the cupboard for later on.

As Alice sat down on the couch, she attempted to keep the booze out of her mind. Arizona wrapped an arm around her, and for once, Alice didn't protest. She leaned up against the blonde doctor and stared at the TV, wondering what Lexie was doing, and also how she was going to get the liquor out of the cabinet.

* * *

><p>Lexie wiped at the tears on her face and blew her nose. She hadn't been able to stop the sobbing since the moment the door had shut behind Callie and Arizona. The surgeon got up from the couch and made her way into the kitchen, where she found her phone charging on the counter. Lexie quickly dialed Mark's number. He answered on the third ring. The man immediately knew something was wrong when Lexie once again burst into tears.<p>

"Lex! Lexie, tell me what's wrong! Are you hurt?"

"A-Alice" Was all the surgeon could sob out.

"Alice? Is she hurt? Lex, what's going on?"

"W-we got in a fight, a-and-" Lexie's sentence broke off as her emotions took over again.

"Hey, I'll be over as fast as I can. It's going to be alright." Mark said. Lexie managed to get a 'uh-huh' out and hung up.

15 minutes later, Mark had arrived at the resident house and took Lexie in his arms. She had managed to pull herself together some, and was able to tell him the whole story. The younger woman could tell he was upset as well, but he hid it better than she had been able to. The two adults eventually crawled into bed together, forgetting that they both had early shifts tomorrow, and fell asleep.

* * *

><p>As the movie played on, Alice's plan of hitting up the alcohol seemed less and less ideal. If Lexie was upset over her cutting, she couldn't even bear to imagine her reaction over her relapsing and turning to drinking again.<p>

Alice watched the screen with a numb disinterest for a while. The movie bored her but kept her mind off of the fight with Lexie. She shifted on the couch and stretched out, eventually giving in and resting her head in Arizona's lap. She pushed the events of earlier out of her mind and fell asleep.

**_Hey guys, sorry the update took so long. Hope to see some reviews!_**


	30. Chapter 30

Alice woke up the next morning in the guest room bed. She had a few blissful moments before the previous night's events came rushing back. She felt her stomach twist, and she swore to herself. Who knew how long it was going to take to get Lexie to accept her again, if it was even possible. She had fucked up so many times already; Alice wouldn't blame her if Lexie didn't want her to live with the residents anymore.

Alice drug herself out of bed and threw on clothes from her duffel bag. She wandered around the apartment, wondering if either of the women were home. She eventually came across Callie in the kitchen.

"Morning," Callie smiled at her.

"Yeah hi." Alice mumbled back as she fixed herself a cup of coffee. She gave the cereal cupboard a considering glance but passed by it on her way to the barstool.

"Nu-uh. You're going to eat breakfast. I carried your skinny ass back to your room, and you were ridiculously light." Callie's tone was reproachful. Alice simply rolled her eyes. "I'm not kidding, Alice. It's not healthy how thin you are." Still no reaction. "Anna is going to have some very difficult questions for you when she gets an eyeful of all of those bones." That got Alice's attention. She muttered something unintelligible but settled on a piece of whole wheat toast. Callie shook her head, still not satisfied, and pushed the fruit bowl towards her. Alice picked up an apple.

"What's that saying, 'an apple a day keeps the doctor away?' Well, with the growing amount of medical professionals bothering me, I'm going to have to eat the entire fucking orchard if I have a prayer of keeping you guys at bay." Alice crunched loudly into the fruit. Callie made a face.

"You're in an even more awful mood than usual. What gives?" Alice glared at her.

"What gives? Are you seriously asking that question after what happened last night? For a proclaimed ortho god, you sure are lacking in the logic department." She snapped at the Latina doctor.

"Right, right, sorry. Look, Lexie's been having a tough time lately. She and Mark have been fighting, and she's worried about you." Callie refrained from snapping back, and attempted to comfort the teen.

"She and Mark have been fighting?" Alice asked. This was new.

"Over me, no doubt." Alice sighed heavily. "No, it's not that." Callie lied. "Of course it is. They've been fighting over what to do with the crazy teen that doesn't eat, sleep, and cuts herself more often that she'd like to admit. I need to go apologize. It's too soon to move back in but I at least owe her that much." Alice decided. Callie nodded slowly.

"When do you want to go?" She asked.

"As soon as I'm done with this if that's ok." Callie nodded in understanding.

"I'll go get changed and then we can go." Alice nodded gratefully.

* * *

><p>Alice waited anxiously for Callie to get changed. She went over what she wanted to say in her head, but she knew when the time came it would be no use. She and Lexie were done, at least for a while. Alice couldn't count the number of times she had hurt the woman. Looking back now, she hated herself for it.<p>

Callie returned, dressed in a sweater and jeans, and Alice stood up. "Ready?" The doctor asked. Alice nodded and followed her out to the car.

"She's going to forgive you, you know that right?" Callie asked as she drove towards the resident's house. Alice sighed in the seat next to her.

"Maybe someday, but not now. I've put her through too much." Alice argued.

"You're a good kid, Lexie knows that." Callie insisted, shooting a sidelong glance at her.

"How can you say that? You know what I've done!" Alice nearly yelled.  
>Callie didn't reply. They had arrived at the house.<p>

"Do you want me to come in?" Callie offered. Alice shook her head, got out of the car, and jogged up into the stairs into the house.

"Lexie?" Alice called out, kicking her shoes off as she shut the door behind her. Two seconds later, Meredith walked around the corner. She looked at Alice in surprise.

"I didn't expect to see you here so soon." The woman said.

"I'm not moving back or anything. I just have to apologize. Is she home?" Alice replied sheepishly.

"Upstairs, in her room." Meredith gestured with her head up the stairs and gave Alice an encouraging smile. Alice sighed and started up the steps.

"Lex?" Alice called out again once she reached the top of the stairs.

"In here." It was obvious Lexie didn't know it was her, based on the tone of her voice. Alice braced herself and walked into the older woman's room.

Lexie turned around and Alice literally saw her face fall. The older woman cleared her throat and went back to putting on makeup in the mirror. Alice sighed and waited a couple moments before speaking.

"I'm not here to ask to move back in or anything. I came to apologize. About Mark, and me refusing Jessica, and just...everything." Alice said quietly.

Lexie pressed her lips together and said nothing. "Please, Lexie. Don't hate me. I don't have a lot of people left in my life. I need you. I'll get help, I really will. I'll do what you want, just please don't abandon me too." Alice sobbed. Lexie sighed and put the eyeliner pencil down.

"Of course I'm not going to abandon you, Alice! I'd never do that. But why does it have to come to this for you to understand that you need to stick with it and get help?"

"Because the help never seems to help Lexie. Yes, I did need help to get clean, but that was a physical problem. Psychological ones are different. Therapy doesn't help because the other person never truly understands what you've gone through." Alice sighed.

"I'm going to go before we get into another fight. So I guess...I guess I'll see you around." Alice said, not having the strength to fight with Lexie again. She quickly exited the room, and was kind of disappointed when Lexie didn't call after her.

Alice gave Meredith a sad look before walking out of the house and into Callie's car. The surgeon looked at her questioningly, noticing that she didn't really seem relieved. "Did everything go okay?" The concerned surgeon asked, starting the car and pulling away from the curb. Alice shrugged.

"I don't know. I practically had to get on my knees and beg for her to talk to me. And now she wants me to get help again. But Jessica and I just aren't...compatible, you know?" Alice lamented.

"I see, and I'd kind of have to agree on that. But, we can figure this out later. What do you want to do today?" Callie asked, trying to brighten the mood a bit. Her eyebrows rose when smirked.

"Well...I sort of have a date tonight." Alice said, feeling her stomach flip when she thought about seeing Anna. Callie smiled.

"Ahhhhh, that's right, Anna. So, you really like her?" The Latina asked, coming to a stop at a red light.

"Yeah...a lot. She's just...she's just great." Alice said, feeling her face turn red.

"So when do we get to meet her?" Callie questioned.

"I don't know." Alice sighed, leaning against the window.

"Well at least tell me about her." The woman pressed, wanting to know more about this mysterious Anna.

"Okay. Um, she's gorgeous. Her hair is like, auburn and really soft. And her eyes are really, really bright green. She's tall, and has the most amazing freaking figure ever. And she's hilarious and her smile is just, oh my God, I can't even explain it." Alice ranted, staring dreamily out the window, at one of the ferry boats out in the distant water.

"Wow, you're really falling for her." Callie noted. It was nice to see Alice so happy about something.

"Correction; fell." Alice replied, laughing a bit.

* * *

><p>It had been a month since the big fight. Arizona and Callie made it clear that she could stay as long as she wanted, but there was still a void in Alice that only Lexie could fill. Alice sighed heavily and pushed the thought out of her mind as she finished getting ready for her evening with Anna. Tonight was the night she had promised to tell her about her elusive past, and she was already anxious enough without thinking about that certain brunette, Bambi eyed surgeon. "Do I look alright?" She asked Arizona worriedly as she walked into the kitchen. Arizona looked up from her book.<p>

"Yes! Looks great. I've got some flats that will go well if you want to borrow them." She offered.

Alice nodded. "That would be awesome, thanks!"

Alice finished getting ready and slipped on the pair of flats just as she heard the doorbell ring. A week ago, since Anna was just over a year older than her, had gotten her license. So now, she always picked Alice up.

"Bye guys!" Alice called as she opened the door and stepped out. Anna was waiting for her, and smiled as she took her hand. Alice leaned in for a quick kiss, and the two hurried towards Anna's car.  
>Anna had decided that she wanted to cook Alice dinner. So, she brought the girl home to her empty house. Alice was glad the two would finally have some alone time, and it was the perfect setting to tell her what had happened.<p>

* * *

><p>Anna turned out to be an excellent cook, and the girls ate their dinner and talked contently. It wasn't often that they got to be all alone, and this was nice. Finally, the meal was finished and Anna gave her girlfriend a devilish grin. Getting up from the table, she pulled Alice up from her chair as well. "Time for dessert." She whispered into the other girl's ear.<p>

Three minutes later, Alice and Anna were up the stairs and in Anna's room. Alice had forgotten about her plans to tell Anna about her past...until the girl started pulling her shirt off. Alice's eyes flashed open as she heard Anna gasp.

"Alice...what happened to you?" Anna asked, breaking her eyes away from the scars on her girlfriend's abdomen. Alice sighed and pulled her shirt back on.

"Look, I've been meaning to tell you for long time. A while ago, my...my parents got really pissed at me. And they, uh, they did this," Alice gestured to her stomach.

"Look, I've been meaning to tell you for long time. I don't live with my parents, for obvious reasons." She gestured to the scars.

"Wait, _they_ did this to you?" Anna sounded disgusted. Alice nodded. "They're drunks, and mentally unstable. It was somewhat my fault; I wasn't exactly easy to get along with. After the two incidents that left me looking like this, they left Seattle. I haven't heard from them in months, and I will never be in contact with them again." Anna nodded, looking both upset and overwhelmed.

"Where do you live now then?"

"Do you remember the shooting at Seattle Grace?" Anna nodded. "I was the one patient who was hit in the fire. The doctor who found me and saved me took me in after that, and then again when my parents left. We got in a fight recently so I have been staying with Callie and Arizona, two other surgeons, but technically Lexie is my guardian and her place is where I call home. Where I'm staying now is only temporary until I can fix things with her."

"I'm so sorry." Anna whispered, before kissing her girlfriend once again. Alice felt a huge weight lift off of her and she kissed her girlfriend back feverishly. Several minutes later, she felt the girl's hands pulling at her shirt again.

* * *

><p>Weeks passed. Alice felt herself getting restless to move back into the resident's house. She missed Lexie. A lot. Alice decided it was time to make her move.<p>

Alice took a deep breath and pushed open Lexie's bedroom door. She looked up from her book, startled. "Oh, Alice. Hi." Her tone was neutral. Alice smiled briefly and stepped in.

"I'm moving back in tomorrow." She announced, sitting down on the bed.

"Excuse me?" Lexie closed her book.

"You heard me. We're both too stubborn to admit that we were both wrong that night. So, I'm going to be the one to resolve this. I can't promise you that I'll never pick up a blade again, but as of that night I haven't cut since." Lexie looked at her in disbelief.

"I don't believe it." She said simply. Alice raised an eyebrow.

"I had a feeling you'd say that." She pulled off her shirt and stepped out of her shorts. "Look for yourself. No recent cuts, Lexie. I'm not lying to you." Alice insisted, pulling her clothes back on.

"Hmm. Fair enough. Alex ate all of your Captain Crunch though, FYI." Lexie grinned. Alice laughed in relief and leaned forward to hug the smiling surgeon.

* * *

><p>Two months later, Lexie and Alice were living nearly problem free. Sure, Alice would have the occasional flashback or nightmare every so often, but other than that, things were great. Anna had met the residents and seemed pretty comfortable with her slightly crazy life.<p>

"Hey!" Alice said, opening the door to see Anna standing there. The girl had asked if they could hang out and since the residents' house was empty, Alice had invited her over.

"Hi." Anna replied, giving her a small smile. She stepped into the house but didn't make any attempt to put her purse down or kick off her shoes.

"Um...you going to just stand there, or are you actually going to come in?" Alice laughed, tilting her head to the side. Something wasn't right.

"Alice, I came over here to tell you that I'm breaking up with you." Anna said bluntly. Alice felt her heart drop into her stomach and struggled to speak.

"Why?" The heartbroken girl choked out.

"I met someone else." Anna said simply. Alice fought back tears.

"Who is she?" Alice managed to ask. Anna smirked.

"_He_ goes to school with me." The older girl said, turning and opening the door to leave the house. Alice wanted to chase after her, but her feet wouldn't move. It was like her entire body was numb, except for her heart.

* * *

><p>The next few months for Alice were a downward spiral. Ever since Anna broke up with her, she had turned back to drugs, only this time more hard core. She hid it well from all of the surgeons, careful to make sure that they wouldn't find out and force her to sober up again.<p>

"Fuck." She muttered in frustration as she started to come down from her high. Although she was taking larger doses of Oxy, she was no longer experiencing as strong of a rush, and she came down much more quickly.

"Not strong enough bro. Try this." A dazed Chip held a needle out her way.

"Heroin?" Alice heard doubt creep into her voice. That stuff was no joke.

"It's fine, I'm fine right? Trust me..." He mumbled. Alice contemplated this for a moment before accepting the needle and shooting up. Chip was right. The reaction was instantaneous. A few minutes later Chip looked over in alarm as he noticed that Alice's breathing was shallow and she was unresponsive. He frantically searched for her cell and dialed the first contact- Arizona Robbins.

"This is Dr. Robbins." Arizona answered the phone sleepily, not bothering to check the caller ID.

"Oh good, you're one of the doctors." The voice on the phone sounded relieved.

"Excuse me? Who is this?" Arizona was now alert.

"Uh, Alice's friend. She's kinda in bad shape."

Arizona leapt up, searching for her shirt in the dark. "Who are you? What's wrong with Alice? What happened?" She demanded.

"Chip. She... I think she OD'd. We're at my house." He prattled off his address and Arizona ran out the door. "Call an ambulance. Keep an eye on her breathing- got it?" He mumbled a response and she hung up the phone and started her car.

* * *

><p>There were no speed limits as far as Arizona was concerned as she sped towards Chip's address. She was there in twelve minutes and practically fell trying to get into the house fast enough. When she burst through the door, she could hear a low voice coming from the living room.<p>

"Thank God." Chip said as the doctor appeared in the door way. She didn't reply as she quickly kneeled down next to Alice and felt for a pulse. It was disturbingly slow, as was her breathing. Suddenly, Alice arched a bit off of the floor and Arizona could see vomit start to trickle out of her mouth.

"Shit." Arizona hissed as she tried to fight back tears. The blonde woman quickly rolled Alice over onto her side and opened the girl's mouth so that she wouldn't choke on the fluid in her mouth.

As soon as Alice was in the clear from choking, Arizona rolled her back over and started CPR. She could see through the slits in the girl's eyelids that her pupils were extremely dilated.

"Is she gonna be okay?" Came Chip's quiet, nervous voice.

"I don't know." Arizona replied curtly as she focused on keeping the girl's heart pumping, and getting air into her lungs. Finally, the sound of sirens was heard in the distance.

Two minutes later, the ambulance had arrived and paramedics were hooking up an IV to Alice and getting ready to inject Naloxone inter her system. Chip had bailed as soon as he heard the sirens, muttering apologies as he left. Alice had passed out about two minutes before. Once the Naloxone had been injected, they loaded her onto a gurney and started wheeling her out.

Arizona started towards her car as Alice was loaded into the ambulance. She sighed before opening her phone and calling Callie, who answered her phone cheerfully. Arizona hesitated before speaking. "Alice overdosed...no, she was at that boy, Chip's house...he said it was heroin...I don't know, I thought she was clean...she was completely unresponsive, pupils dilated, shallow breathing, some muscle spasms. It was bad. Look, I'll meet you at the hospital. Tell Lexie." Arizona hung up her phone and attempted to keep up with the ambulance in front of her.

* * *

><p>Arizona parked her car and burst into the hospital, having already seen Alice's gurney be wheeled in through the emergency enterance. She arrived through the doors, gasping for breath, and was met by Callie. "Where's Lexie?" The out of breath surgeon panted. Callie shook her head.<p>

"She's in surgery. I didn't tell her yet." The Latina said. Arizona sighed and ran her hand through her hair.

"Alright. Where is she? Who's her doctor?" Arizona asked.

"Christina's got her. Figured she'd be able to keep from being too emotional." Callie replied, leading the blonde towards one of the trauma rooms. She opened the door and they both stepped in.

"Hey! You can't be in here." Cristina spoke over her shoulder.

"What? That's absurd." Callie frowned.

"I said no. She's an admitted patient this time, and you're considered family. Family waits outside of the exam room. Out." She shooed the pair out despite their protests.

Callie and Arizona sat outside the door, listening to the panic that was going on inside. A couple of minutes later, they heard the defibrillator charging, and made out Christina yelling "clear". This occurred 3 more times, which left Callie and Arizona holding their breath each time, until finally, they heard a muffled "she's stable" from inside. The two doctors relaxed, and their grip on each other's hands eventually loosened. Just then, Lexie came around the corner. She frowned when she noticed the two surgeon's odd positions.

"What's going on?" The youngest Grey asked, sensing their moods.

"Lexie, we need you to listen before you react here, alright?" Arizona said carefully. She saw fear spark in the young surgeon's eye as she nodded.

"Alice overdosed on heroin. She was with Chi-" Arizona was cut off as Lexie threw herself at the door with a despaired string of "no's."

"Lexie! Calm down!" Arizona said, pulling the nearly hysterical girl away from the door before continuing.

"When I got there, she was barely breathing, had a weak pulse, was vomiting, and she was having some muscle spasms. From what we've been able to hear, they've used the panels 4 times, and they were able to stabilize her." Arizona finished, watching as tears came streaming down Lexie's face.

* * *

><p>Half an hour later, Cristina stepped out of the trauma room. Lexie looked at her desperately.<p>

"She's alright." The doctor said tiredly. Lexie, Arizona, and Callie sighed in relief.

"She's being moved into one of the rooms on the 3rd floor right now. But before you go up, Derek and Meredith want to see you." Christina tilted her head down the hall, where Derek was waiting. Lexie nodded and started towards him.

Derek led Lexie into an empty on call room where Meredith was waiting.

"You guys heard?" Lexie asked, her voice hoarse from crying. Derek and Meredith nodded.

"That's what we wanted to talk to you about. I just got off the phone with Amelia. She's agreed to take Alice in, to help her. It could be good for her." Derek said. Lexie's eyes widened.

"What...what if she thinks I'm giving up on her?" Lexie asked uncertainly.

"Lexie, it'd be good for her. Amelia knows what she's going through, addiction wise anyway. She could help her." Meredith said. Lexie nodded finally and Derek and Meredith both gave her comforting smiles.

* * *

><p>Alice's eyes fluttered open as she groaned when the fluorescents hit her eyes. After they adjusted, she realized she wasn't alone.<p>

"Hey." Callie said quietly, giving Alice a small smile.

"What? Ohhh, shit." Alice shook her head at herself as the memories started to come back. "I screwed up _so _badly. I... she left me and I didn't want to think about it or hurt like that, and I went to Chip to get high. I'm sorry, everyone." Alice's voice was barely a whisper and she was too ashamed to even make eye contact.

"Shh, you're here. That's what matters most right now." Lexie forced a small smile, and willed her tears at bay.

"Guys, could I talk to Alice alone for a sec?" Lexie asked. Callie and Arizona nodded and left the room, giving Alice comforting smiles as they left.

"I'm so sorry-" Lexie cut the girl off before she could start again.

"Alice, you're alright. But we have to do something about this. We both know you're going to start having your cravings again." Lexie said solemnly. Alice nodded and bit her lip.

"Derek and I talked. His sister, Amelia, was an Oxy addict to. She's been through rehab, and has been clean for a while now. She works at a practice out in LA along with Derek's ex-wife. They've agreed to help you kick this." Lexie said. Alice's eyes widened and she didn't respond.

"You're giving up on me?" The teenager finally managed to ask.

"No! It's nothing like that! This could just really be great for you." Lexie assured her. Alice didn't seem convinced.

"I'm really not sure if I can be helped Lexie. You guys tried so hard last time and look where I am now. Hospitalized for an OD. Maybe I'm just not meant to be fixed." Alice picked at a loose thread on her shirt. Lexie shook her head.

"Seattle is poisonous. Go to LA, get a fresh start, get clean, and then when you're ready come back. This isn't me casting you off hun, this is you getting the opportunity that you really need." Lexie smiled in assurance.

"I'm scared of what comes next. As much as Seattle sucks, I know it here. I have no idea what to expect there."

"Amelia is super nice, so is Addison. They work at a practice which means normal hours for you. A change of scenery will help with recovering, and so will living with someone who knows what you're struggling with. This is a good opportunity, Alice. Please take it, let yourself get better." Alice didn't reply for a minute.

"Fine. But if I don't like it, can I come home?" She whispered.

"Of course, you know you're always welcome here. You don't even have to ask." Lexie replied. Alice nodded. She shifted to the edge of her hospital bed and patted the empty space beside her.

"Come sit, you look exhausted. You've been up at least 18 hours." Alice's tone was worried. Lexie sighed in exasperation.

"You most definitely don't need to be worrying about me!" She said but she lay down anyways. Alice wrapped her arms around the surgeon and in minutes they were both asleep.

* * *

><p>A few hours later Alice woke up to the quiet talking of Arizona, Callie and Lexie. Arizona glanced over and noticed that Alice was awake. "Oh shoot, did we wake you?" She asked worriedly. Alice shook her head.<p>

"Good. Hey, someone left you flowers at the house," Callie gestured to the vase on the side table. Alice raised her eyebrows in surprise.

"C'mon, we can talk outside." Lexie suggested, wanting to give Alice some space. The other two nodded and followed her out, leaving Alice to read the note on the flowers in privacy.

_Alice, Chip told me what happened. I'm so sorry, I never meant for this to happen. Hope you're doing okay,_

_-Anna_

Alice stared at disbelief at the note. Her vision was becoming more blurred by the second both by tears and anger. She grabbed the vase in disgust and hurled it at the wall in anger. The trio glanced up, startled by the noise. Lexie started for the door. "Wait here, I'll get this one." Arizona suggested. Lexie bit her lip uncertainly but didn't stop her.

"Hey! Alice! What the hell was that for?" Arizona demanded as she stepped around the shattered mess. Alice shook her head, eyes blazing, and handed her the note card. Arizona glanced over it and shook her head angrily, before adding it to the pile of flowers and shattered vase on the floor.

"What fucking nerve. She leaves me for some guy, ignores my calls, and then sends a nice little note and floral arrangement and hopes that it's all better." Arizona nodded her head in agreement.

* * *

><p>Lexie shut the door of the on call room and smiled at Mark who was already waiting. "How is she doing?" He asked, looking concerned. "Better, sort of. Cristina fixed her up, but she's struggling. You know, mentally. That break up with Anna really hit her hard. She's agreed to go to LA to get clean."<p>

"Lexie, that's great!" Mark grinned that infectious smile, but it disappeared quickly when he realized that Lexie wasn't smiling back. "Lex, this is good news! This will be great for her. Why aren't you happy?" Lexie sat down on the bed beside him.

"What if she thinks that I'm trying to pawn her off? Of course it isn't true, but I don't want her to take this the wrong way. I'm doing this to help her, but what if she doesn't see it like that? She says she understands, but you know how good of a liar she is. What if she's hurt and hiding it, only to go off to LA and do something like this again? No, I can't do this, it's too risky. She could so easily sneak off and get wrapped up in the drugs and OD somewhere in an ally and we'd never see her again-" Mark cut her off as she worked herself into a panic.

"Lexie, relax! Alice is a smart girl, she's not going to run off and OD with some dealer in an ally. She loves you Lex, and she wouldn't do that to you. Even what happened yesterday wasn't intentional. And all of that aside, say she did want to run off and get high. Do you think she'd manage to even sneak out between the watchful eyes of Addison and Amelia? Amy knows all the tips, tricks, triggers, and warning signs. Alice wouldn't have so much as start packing a purse and Amy would be onto her. She's going to be safe there. She's going to get better- truly this time. And when she is, there's no doubt in my mind that she will be back on the first plane she can and come home to you. Okay?" Mark's fingers brushed against Lexie's chin, tilting it up so her gaze would meet his. She blinked back the tears that had started to form and smiled at him.

"You're right. Jeez, it's like you've got this uncanny ability to make me feel so much better, all the time. Thank you, Mark. Not just for today, but for always." She cupped his hand and leaned forward to kiss him. It was slow at first, but the fire between them built quickly, and soon Lexie was yanking her scrubs off. She threw her pager on a nearby cot and for once, the only thing in the world was them.

* * *

><p>A week later, Alice was surrounded by an entourage of surgeons in an airport. Her hand gripped her suitcase in a white-knuckled grip and her stomach was twisted in knots. She was going to have to board soon. Swallowing the lump in her throat, she turned around to look at the small crowd of adults. One by one, they came forward to hug her. Tears glistened in all of their eyes and even Jessica seemed to be having a hard time letting the girl go.<p>

"If you hurt Lexie, I'll be on the first flight back here to rip your balls off Mark." Alice whispered in the older man's ear as she hugged him goodbye. His laugh boomed in the terminal, leaving everyone else to wonder what was said.

"I'll take good care of her." Mark assured Alice as he stepped back from the hug. She smiled and nodded before turning to Lexie. The two stared at each other for a couple moments before throwing their arms around each other in a tight embrace.

"Text me. Every day. Every hour." Lexie said, struggling to keep her emotions at bay. Alice nodded, biting the inside of her cheek as she held back tears.

"I promise." Alice replied shakily. She and Lexie leaned back from each other and Lexie squeezed the girl's hand once more before turning and heading towards her flight.

_**Hey guys, so we pretty much wrapped everything up in a super big chapter. This however, is NOT the end of the story, as we are already working on a spin-off in LA! But don't worry, there will be plenty of jumping back and forth between LA and Seattle! Also, we have been taking your suggestions into mind and hopefully will be incorporating some into the story! Please review!**_


	31. Chapter 31

So I finally published the first chapter to the sequel! It's called New Beginnings, so feel free to check it out and tell me what you think! :) Sorry for the wait!


	32. Chapter 32

_**Hey! So if any of you have been following the sequel to this (New Beginnings) Alice has returned to Seattle for a bit in it because of the situation with Jo. And if you haven't read it yet, go ahead and get caught up before diving into this monster of a chapter**_

Alice rooted through her bag, checking again for her flight paperwork. Satisfied that everything was in order, she tucked it under her seat and turned her attention back to her phone. The screen showed the text from Lexie that came in before she had switched the airplane mode on, which she had ignored. Lexie was all excited for her to come home, but Alice couldn't shake the sting of betrayal she felt for being left out of the loop of the major news of her pregnancy. Lost in her thoughts, Alice was startled by the jarring motion of the plane touching down. Mercifully, her luggage appeared quickly and the security and customs lines were brief.

Alice made her way through the crowds of tired travelers, anxiously searching the area where relatives and friends gathered to pick their loved ones up. Finally, she caught sight of Lexie. Although she was upset that Lexie was hiding her pregnancy, that took a backseat to her overwhelming happiness at being reunited with the adored surgeon. Weaving through groups of people, she closed the short distance between them and all but threw herself at Lexie as she wrapped her arms around her in a tight hug. After a few long moments, the pair disentangled themselves from their embrace. Alice picked up her bags as they headed in the direction of the parking lot.

"I really missed you, Lexie. I'm glad to be home." Violet had been encouraging her to be more mindful and expressive with her emotions, which was extremely difficult for the stoic teen who had spent so long avoiding her emotions.

"I missed you so much too, we all did. Mark wanted to be here to pick you up as well, but he's in surgery all day."

"I almost forgot how busy you guys get. It's a lot calmer at the practice." Alice replied. She watched as Lexie's smile faltered for a second and what looked like guilt flashed through the surgeon's eyes.  
>"So you really like it over there?" The brunette asked, opening the glass door in front of her for her younger companion. The two of them stepped out into the parking lot and Alice shivered involuntarily at the breeze.<p>

"Yeah. I mean, I miss everyone here. The weather's a little nicer though." Alice admitted, scanning the parking lot for Lexie's car. She spotted the small blue vehicle a few rows in and stepped onto the pavement, her guardian following close behind.

"I can imagine. Are you getting along with Amelia and Addison?" Alice rolled her eyes as they neared the car and Lexie popped the trunk.

"Yes. They're actually really helpful. I don't think Addison and I have really connected or anything yet, but I like Amelia a lot." Lexie nodded in understanding as she helped Alice to put her bags in the trunk. She had figured that the teenager would take more quickly to Amelia.

"I'm sure it'll just take time for you all to get completely used to each other. Everyone's waiting at the residents' house, but if you want to stop somewhere and get something to eat first, I'm sure they can wait." Lexie offered as the two of them got into the front of the car. Alice shook her head and glanced down at her phone.

"No, I'm kind of anxious to see everyone. And I ate on the plane," the teenager paused for a second, "Is Jo going to be there?"

"Yeah. You a little nervous?" Lexie asked, starting the engine and pulling out of the parking lot. The airport was only about 10 minutes from the house, which was exactly why she had suggested going for food. She had a feeling that Alice was going to be a tad anxious about meeting a family member she had only recently discovered, considering her track record with relatives.

"A little. It's just that she's a surgeon and all accomplished and I'm the drug addict that had to be sent to LA." Alice's eyes wandered to the window and Lexie noticed that her unwillingness to make eye contact hadn't changed.

"Honey, you're a lot more than that. I don't know a lot of teenagers that have survived what you have and saved a surgeon's life." Alice blushed at Lexie's reminder and kept her eyes fixed out the window.

"Still. Does she know about the, um, overdose? And the fact I dated a girl. And that time I pulled a knife on Jessica. Actually, both times I pulled a knife on Jessica?" Alice listed every huge issue she could think of at the present moment and then turned to look at Lexie nervously.

"No. We didn't tell her the specifics. That's up to you. All she knows is that you've had some trouble with drugs and that your parents are terrible, awful people." Lexie responded, rounding the corner onto the resident house's street. Alice sucked in a deep breath as she felt a huge wave on anxiety begin to swell up. The teenager attempted to focus on her breathing as they pulled up to the familiar building. She struggled to force away the flashbacks of waking up on the sidewalk as she stepped out of the car and instead chose to put her mind on the fact that she was about to see some of the people she had been missing terribly. Hurrying up the stairs, Alice burst through the front door.

"Alice!" A collective chorus of voices cried and the teenager hardly had time to prepare herself before she was bombarded.

"You finally put a little meat on your bones! What kind of LA exercise plans do they have out there?" Callie exclaimed, hugging Alice tightly and practically gasping when she didn't feel the teenager's bones sticking out.

"Yeah, well, it was all Addison's pasta and long runs on the beach." She chuckled, turning her attention to the blonde pediatric surgeon hugging her from the other side.  
>"And you got a tan!" Arizona squealed, pulling back from the teen. Alice blushed, yet nodded and then quickly scanned the room. There were more people than she expected. Meredith and Derek soon stepped forward to give her a hug and she couldn't help but notice the extreme similarity between the neurosurgeon and his sister. Next in line were Christina and Owen, and then Alice found herself face to face with Jessica.<p>

"Hey there." The psychiatrist said, her trademark smirk plastered across her face. Despite their past, Alice managed to smile back and hugged her.

"Hey there Devil Shrink." The teenager winked. She watched as Jessica arched an eyebrow and rolled her eyes before turning her attention to the last two in the room. Alex, and the girl who presumably was her sister.

"Sup kid." Alex waved, stepping forward and tugging the brunette beside him forward. The living room got substantially quieter and Alice felt her heart rate spike again.

"Hi. I guess you're Jo?" The teenager asked awkwardly. She couldn't help but admit the resemblance between herself and the doctor. Suddenly very self-conscious, Alice tugged her sweatshirt sleeves down further.

"Yeah, um, that's me. And you're Alice." The nervous edge in Jo's voice managed to give Alice a tiny bit of comfort. At least she was anxious about the situation too.

"That's me. I'm kind of infamous around here. It's nice to meet you." Alice forced a laugh and awkwardly stuck her hand out, not knowing if it was acceptable to hug her yet. To her relief, Jo laughed as well and shook it immediately.

"Well I'll be." A voice broke the momentary silence that had fallen upon the room. Alice turned her head, immediately recognizing the tone of her ex-therapist. "It's all in the smile, and your eyes. They're identical." Jessica explained. Jo shot her a puzzled glance, not quite sure how to respond.

"Yeah, it runs in the family, the amber irises. Everyone on my dad's side has got them…" Alice tried to diffuse the weird energy in the room, but in her haste ended up saying something that was next to no help at all. She cringed as a flashback to memories of her father threatened to take hold, desperately trying to fight it off with about the same success one might have with building a sandcastle in the midst of incoming tide. Deceivingly perceptive and empathetic to flashbacks, Owen was first to intervene with the swiftness of any good trauma surgeon.

"I bet Alice would like some time to unwind after her travels, and we've all got obligations to take care of at the hospital I'm sure." Alice shot him a grateful smile, as everyone in the room started getting organized to leave. With a chorus of goodbyes, surgeons took their leave until the only remaining people in the house were Alex and Jo, Mark and Lexie, and Alice.

"Why don't you two go out for a bit? Catch up over manicures, or whatever it is you ladies do?" Mark suggested with a grin, holding up his hands in mock defense as Alice playfully smacked him.

"Manicures, no. Catch up, definitely. Is that good with you, Alice?" Lexie piped up. The teen's grin faded ever so slightly as she realized that long talks almost inevitably led to difficult topics, but she wasn't going to miss an opportunity to spend time with her favorite Grey.

"Okay, let's go out to lunch then?" Lexie suggested, arching her eyebrow in anticipation for Alice's response. She could tell that the teenager had definitely been eating a bit more, but couldn't help remember her unwillingness to eat before leaving.

"I ate on the plane actually. How about a coffee run?" There wasn't a hint of insincerity in Alice's voice, and Lexie surprisingly found herself believing her.

"You always have loved your Starbucks. Let's go." Alice quickly waved goodbye to everyone and followed Lexie out of the house. As excited as she was to catch up with everyone, the welcoming crowd had been a bit overwhelming. She made sure to remind herself to make time for Callie and Arizona before she had to hop on a flight back to LA.

"You want to walk or drive?" Lexie asked, pulling the teenager back out of her thoughts. Alice thought for a moment and decided that a walk on her old running route would be nice.

"Walk." She answered definitely. With that, the two of them started towards the coffee shop at a leisurely pace. They filled the venture with small talk, knowing that there was no use getting into the deep stuff until they were situated with their coffees.

Within 15 minutes, Lexie and Alice had reached the vacant Starbucks and gotten their drinks. They had just sat down at a table when another figure walked in through the front door and Alice froze. It was her ex-girlfriend.

"Don't act weird." Alice mumbled to Lexie, who glanced around in confusion. The surgeon froze when she spotted the teenage girl and her gaze narrowed. The hope that she wouldn't be spotted disappeared as Alice watched Anna catch her eye from across the café and start over towards her.

"Alice, oh my god, um, hey. You look great. Where've you been?" The petite girl asked, nearing their table. Alice nudged Lexie under the table to keep her quiet and smiled up at Anna.

"LA actually. And thank you." Alice replied, noticing the fact that her ex was staring her up and down, wide-eyed.

"So are you back in town for good now?" Hiding a scoff, Alice bit her lip. She couldn't believe the girl that had dumped her was trying to flirt right now.

"No. I got back in a few days. You and what's-his-name still together?" Alice asked, arching an eyebrow. She watched as Anna's cheeks burned red and she averted her gaze.

"We actually broke up after a few weeks. Well, it was nice seeing you." Anna's voice died down as she walked away and Alice turned her attention back to Lexie.

"I can't believe her. She was looking at you like a piece of freaking meat." Lexie's voice was laced with disbelief as she watched Alice's ex-girlfriend place her order up at the counter.

"Eh, it's whatever. I mean, I know I look a lot different. So…you're pregnant." Alice went straight to the point. She watched, a bit guiltily, as Lexie averted her gaze and tentatively put a hand on her stomach.

"I'm so sorry I didn't tell you. I was just trying to wait for the right time, and I didn't want to screw up your progress." She apologized softly. Despite the initial anger that Alice had felt upon realizing that Lexie had been hiding something so big from her, she shook her head.

"It's fine. I completely understand. So when's the little nugget due?" Lexie smiled in relief as she realized the brunette wasn't mad at her anymore.

"In about 6 months. We'll fly you home the week I'm due, or as soon as something happens," Lexie paused a bit awkwardly for a few seconds, "So honestly. How've you been doing? How's therapy?"

"Better than it went with Jessica. I mean, I know a lot of people think she's good, but her methods were a little harsh." Alice admitted.

"I know. You two really just weren't a good match. I'm glad you found someone who's helping. You haven't…you haven't used again, right?" Silence rested between the two of them for a second. Alice took a small sip of her coffee before answering.

"No. I haven't. Don't you trust me enough to have told you if I had? Or at least Amelia and Addison would have." Alice couldn't keep the hint of hurt out of her voice at the question.

"Of course I trust you and them. I just…I had to ask, you know? We've been worried about you. You know…we don't really hear from you a lot anymore." Lexie admitted apologetically.

"I know. Between school and therapy and working out, I just get really busy. I'll try to call you more."

"So how is school? Have you met anyone?" Lexie asked, raising her eyebrows. She was relieved to hear that the younger girl had been doing well with her recovery.

"School's okay. And, well, I met this one girl and she and I are getting along pretty well. I'm not quite sure she rolls my way though." Alice admitted.

Lexie nodded hesitantly. Of course she wanted Alice to find someone who she could be happy with, but the surgeon couldn't help but fear that the new girl would end up breaking Alice's hard like Anna had and send the recovering teen into a tailspin. "Just be careful, alright?" Lexie said at last, alluding to the awkward encounter they had just faced with Anna and the months of emotional turmoil prior to that. Alice rolled her eyes briefly, but she understood the root of Lexie's concern nonetheless.

"So, you and Mark are obviously living together then?" Alice swiftly changed the focus off of herself, also choosing to bring up living arrangements as the anxiety about where she would be staying and who she would be with while in Seattle continued to gnaw away at her.

"We're staying in Mark's apartment, for now anyways. Once the baby is here and starts to get a bit older, we are obviously going to get a house, but for now that's not top priority. Callie and Arizona are still in their bungalow; Meredith and Derek are in the house they have built for themselves and the kids on that big woods property, and as you saw, Alex is living in what used to be our Residents' house with Jo." Alice nodded with wide eyes, trying to keep track of all of the changes that happened while she was gone. Being so attuned to the teen, Lexie picked up on her stress instantly.

"How would you feel about staying the night in your old room at Alex's? You can spend some time with Jo, in private and with no unexpected interruptions from a very remorseful ex." Lexie couldn't help but grin with pride for the small victory that Alice had just a few minutes past; the once sick and emotionally wrecked teen was finding her way back to the charismatic and bright teen that had saved Lexie's life while clinging to her own.

"Yeah, I guess that's a good idea. Can I ask you something?" There was an edge of anxiety in Alice's voice and Lexie nodded immediately.

"Of course you can."

"Does Jo actually want to be doing this? Or does is she just meeting me because Alex wants her to?" Lexie couldn't help but sigh as she watched the teenager's insecurity take over.

"Look, Jo has not had an easy life. She doesn't have any family. From what I've heard, she was passed around between foster homes and never really found a temporary one. So she's just about as confident in this as you are. Alex says she's been freaking out all week. Just give it a chance. Let her in. She's not going to hurt you." Alice glanced down at her coffee and nodded reluctantly.

"Okay. Can I stay with Arizona and Callie sometime before I leave too? I'd like to get caught up with them."

"I'm sure they would love that. Do you want to get going? I'm sure it'd be nice if you could have dinner with Alex and Jo." Lexie prompted. Alice couldn't help but smirk at the fact she was making no attempt to be subtle about this, but nodded anyways. The two of them rose from their booth, threw their cups away, and started back towards the residents' house.

* * *

><p>The doorbell rang, and Alice visibly flinched. The sudden interruption to the silence that hung in the air as Jo and Alice ran out of topics for idle chat startled the teen, who had slipped into the long-buried memories now that she was back in the environment where so much had happened. The older of the pair pretended not to notice, giving a slight smile as she stood up to go answer the door. Conversation that Alice couldn't quite make out filled the air and a few moments later Jo reappeared with a pizza box in clutch.<p>

"Kitchen, or out here?" The resident offered with a smile.

"Here's good. I'll go grab some plates." Alice offered, standing up and making her way to the kitchen. Acting on instinct, she had no trouble locating the plates, napkins and cups that she was looking for; leave it to Alex to keep the place exactly the same, likely out of laziness if nothing else. Memories of the countless times she had spent in this very same kitchen with Lexie washed over her, some days where they would be doubled over in fits of laughter, others in screaming matches as she stubbornly refused to eat. Snapping back into reality, she realized that Jo was still waiting on her and hurried back out with the plates.

"Find everything ok?" Jo asked?

"Yeah, not a thing has changed since I left, although it is Alex that we're talking about so I can't say that I'm exactly surprised." Alice winked. The older girl nodded, her eyes shining with amusement. "I wasn't sure what you drink, so I figured I would let you get yourself what you want." Alice explained as she handed over the empty glass. Jo popped into the kitchen, reappearing only moments later with a can of Sprite.

"Guilty pleasure." She shrugged, before taking a seat beside Alice on the couch, who reached out and cracked the lid on the box to reveal a large, extra-cheese with pepperoni and tomato pizza. Each girl helped herself to a slice, and finally Jo sat back, waiting patiently for Alice to take the lead on the conversation.

"I don't even know where to start. How do you even have a conversation like this? I mean, it isn't exactly casual dinner chat." Worry colored Alice's tone, it was obvious she was expecting Jo to judge her for what she was about to reveal.

"Just go from the beginning. How did you and Lexie meet?" Alice finally took a small bite out of her otherwise untouched slice, stalling for time.

"You must remember the shooting, the one where the husband of a dead patient came back with one hell of a vendetta? I was there; I got caught in the fire. I was the only patient to be hit. Lexie found me, and was trying to save me when the gunman came back. She was one of the surgeons on his hit list," a look of disgust passed over Jo's face "and I talked him out of shooting her. We kind of saved each other that day. From there, Lexie took me in while I was healing- Jerry and Lisa were out of town, God only knows what they were up to. I recovered, they came back, and I moved out, not seeing Lexie for a few months after. As you've probably figured, they were abusive- Jerry was always worse though, especially when he was drunk, which was pretty much always by that point. One night, he got too carried away. Lisa at least had the good sense to get me to the hospital so that they didn't have a really serious problem on their hands, so they dumped me at the SGMW emergency room and booked it out of town. That's when the real demons took hold; physical recovery was long and painful, but nothing compared to the mental struggle. I relied on painkillers to cope and I was addicted instantly. When I started to get back on my feet, I had another run-in with Jerry and Lisa that left me worse off than where I started. After that, everyone tried their damnedest to get me clean and help me recover but I was too far gone. I didn't want the help, not truly anyways. We realized that if this was going to work, I needed to commit and I needed to get out of Seattle; being here in the state I was in was just too toxic. So, that's how I ended up in LA- I'm staying with Amelia, who is Derek's sister, and her ex sister-in-law and closest friend, Addison." Finally, Alice took a pause from her rambling. The pent up nervous energy had fueled an endless recount of the somewhat censored story of her past. At last, she gathered up the courage to look up from her lap and meet the gaze of her sister. Jo's eyes were trained on her, an expression of the strange meld of shock, concern and admiration shaping her flawless features. Much to Alice's surprise, she couldn't detect even a hint of judgment or pity.

"Wow." She breathed at last, not quite sure how to respond. "Alice, I'm so sorry. I knew that they were out there somewhere, but I had no idea that they had you. I should have tried harder to trace them down, to uncover the truth and get you out-" the resident was the one who was rambling now.

"No, it's fine. Really, don't go down that path and beat yourself up over something you couldn't have possibly known about. Take it from me- the 'what if' game is torture. I'm not upset or regretful over what happened, because no one has the power to change the past. When you've been where I have, you have to realize that the only thing you can do is focus on the future because if you linger in the past you'll be out of a future to move forward to at all."

Jo squinted at the younger girl for a few seconds before replying. It was hard for her to believe that those words had just come from a teenager. "So you're clean now? Or at least you're doing well?"

"Yeah. I've been sober since I left. California was kind of a fresh start for me." Alice replied. The fact that she had managed to stay clean for this long was a surprise to even herself, but it was something that she was now grateful for. She could be having a very different, much harder conversation right now if she hadn't gotten back on her feet a bit.

"Good. I...I know that must have been hard for you. And I think that you should know I really don't have a great past either. As you probably know, I was in the system for a while. But eventually, I bailed and to keep this simple...I spent high school living in my car." Alice's eyes widened and she attempted to hide her surprise. Alex hadn't told her any of this on the phone. Quite frankly she was taken aback.

"I had no idea. I'm really sorry." The teenager said quietly.

"You don't have to be sorry. I mean, I mostly did alright for myself and I'm in a good spot now. Alice, I just want you to know that I'm here to help you through all of this now. I know you're going to go back to California but just know that you can always come and stay here if you need it. You really mean a lot to everyone here and I want to get to know you as well as they all seem to." Jo stopped talking and stared at her younger sibling anxiously, hoping that she hadn't been too eager. To her relief, Alice nodded a bit before replying.

"Yeah. I mean, yeah, um, I want to get to know you too. And as long as it's okay with Lexie, I'll try to come visit and stuff."

"I'd love that. And with her having the baby and all, I'm sure you'll be back in a few months anyways." Jo pointed out before stifling a yawn. Alice suppressed a smirk as she remembered what it was like to live with hardcore surgeons.

"You work tomorrow?" The teenager asked, throwing her pizza crusts in the now empty box on the coffee table. Jo nodded and threw her's in as well.

"Then go get your sleep. Trust me, I know how much you guys need it. I've dealt with my fair share of sleep deprived surgeons." Alice chuckled, standing up and taking the pizza box with her. The teenager quickly tossed it into the garbage can in the kitchen and then awkwardly stepped back into the living room. She wasn't exactly sure where to go from here.

"I'm sure living here when all the residents were here taught you that. Well, um, goodnight. Alex will be here in the morning and I should be home around 5." The two girls stood in a silence for a few seconds. Ignoring the unfamiliarity of the situation, Alice finally stepped forward and hugged the older girl. A bit surprised, Jo took a second before returning the gesture. From what Alex had told her, she hadn't expected Alice to be this comfortable around her.

"Goodnight." Alice said finally, pulling away from the hug. Jo offered her a small smile and nodded before the two of them went their separate ways.

Alice entered her old bedroom and quickly shut the door behind her. Her stomach twisted in a strange sensation of nostalgia as she surveyed the small room. Memories of her escapes with Chip made a quick appearance in her mind and she quickly shut them down. Alice hadn't expected to find the simple bedroom so intimidating. She had never thought of the amount of times she had laid on her very own bed, drugged out of her mind, ignoring Lexie knocking on her door. Or the amount of times she and the older girl had engaged in screaming matches until Callie or Arizona had to pull them apart. Shaking the thoughts from her mind, Alice made her way to her dresser, intending to throw some of her clothes into the drawers. When she opened the first one, she froze.

"Fuck." The teenager muttered, eyes locked on the small folded up baggie that poked out from under one of her abandoned t-shirts. Apparently, no one had decided to do a final sweep after she had left.

_"It's just weed_" the thought crossed her mind before she could stop it, and Alice couldn't help herself before she picked up the little plastic bag. Her piece was in its original spot as well, right beside the pot. And of course, her lighter rested undisturbed inside a pair of folded up grey socks.

"I guess it is just weed." Alice murmured to herself, taking the paraphernalia in her hands and shutting the door. The brunette crossed her room to the window on the other side and drew back the curtains. The sun had already set and she was surprised that she and Jo had talked that long. A pang of guilt hit her as she realized that she was about to relapse in the room next to the only family member she had left. Sadly, the guilt wasn't enough to keep her from opening the window and perching on the ledge. The smell that hit her when she opened the bag was enough to make her mouth water and her hands worked expertly to quickly pack a bowl. After a moment's hesitation, Alice lifted the small piece of glass to her mouth, flicked the lighter to life, and inhaled.


	33. Chapter 33

_**Hey, sorry for the wait, but here's an extra long chapter to make up for it! Please review and let us know what you think!**_

Ten minutes later, Alice was struggling just to focus on anything for more than two seconds. Her heart was pounding in her chest and instead of feeling relaxed, she felt like she was about to launch into a full scale panic attack. The teenager stared out her dark window for at least a half an hour, trying to keep her breathing under control, before finally giving into an impulse an pulling out her phone. Scrolling through her contacts, Alice managed to click on Amelia's name with a clumsy hand and held the iPhone up to her ear.

"Hello? Alice? Is everything alright?"

"Amelia I'm high." Alice clenched her eyes shut as the words left her mouth. There was about a three second time delay between what she was doing and what she was thinking and her mind was trying desperately to catch up.

"What? Alice, what did you take? Who are you with?" The surgeon demanded quickly.

"I didn't take anything. I just...I found some pot in my dresser and I'm having a really bad high. I'm freaking out."

"Who are you with? Does Lexie know?"

"There's no one in my room right now. Lexie's at her apartment with Mark." Amelia sighed on the other end of the phone. Talking to a stoned teenager was a true test of patience.

"But who are you staying with? Are you at Meredith's old house?" Alice nodded for several seconds before remembering that the older woman could not in fact see her.

"Yeah. Just Alex and Jo live here now. I think they're asleep."

"Okay. We can talk about this in the morning. Just get rid of the rest of what you have and go to sleep." Amelia's rationality about the situation was somehow managing to calm Alice down and she nodded once again.

"Alright. Don't tell Jo. I don't want her...I don't want her to ever know this part of me." Alice admitted quietly. There were a few seconds of silence between her and Amelia.

"We'll come up with a plan in the morning. Just sleep this off."

"Okay. Bye." Alice hung up the phone and then turned back towards the window. She crossed the room unsteadily and sat down on the ledge again, staring at the small pile of paraphernalia next to her. Maybe another bowl would make her feel better.

Three bowls later, Alice could hardly remember how to breathe, let alone stand. The teenager's eyelids were drooping and she slowly lowered herself down off of the window sill before crawling across the floor into bed.

* * *

><p>The bantering of voices slowly dragged Alice from her sleep. Gradually regaining consciousness, she began to distinguish Alex's voice from Jo's and make out bits of the conversation, which appeared to be happening not too far outside her door. Her iPhone sat on the nightstand beside her, buzzing incessantly. Squinting against the daylight flooding in from the drawn curtains from her earlier transgressions, she snatched her phone and winced as she saw the slew of missed calls, voicemails and messages. Most of them were from Amelia and a couple from Lexie but the last text grabbed her attention- it was from Elle. Alice felt a small smile spread across her face as she read the message; it was nothing super elaborate but the fact that Elle was at least initiating conversation and checking in meant that she hadn't totally blown it. Her thoughts were interrupted by a knocking at her door.<p>

"Hey, Alice? It's almost 11 o'clock- I know you're probably recovering from jet lag and all but you haven't moved since last night so if you could just give me some sort of sign that you're alive that would be great…" The groggy teen cleared her throat, mustering up the energy to form a coherent reply.

"Yeah I'm fine, I'll be down in a bit." Apparently satisfied with her answer, the couple backed off, leaving the teen to herself. Alice kicked off her covers and stumbled into the bathroom next door, splashing some cold water on her face in hopes to wake herself up. Just because she felt like shit, didn't mean that she could afford to look like it too and raise suspicions. Deciding she looked halfway presentable, Alice closed her bedroom door to hide the evidence of last night's events and made her way down to the kitchen. The front door came into view just as Jo was tossing on a coat and making her way out.

"I thought you weren't scheduled today?" Alice asked, making her sister pause in her tracks.

"I'm on call though, and the hospital is swamped. Duty calls." Jo smiled apologetically, gathering her things. Alice watched her hesitate, clearly not wanting to upset their fragile relationship. Alice waved it off, shooting the resident a reassuring smile.

"I've lived with surgeons for well over a year. I get it, go be awesome and try not to kill anyone." Jo rolled her eyes playfully, and with that headed out the door. Continuing to the kitchen, a preoccupied Alice nearly bumped into Alex who was hurrying through the hall and for the stairs himself.

"Sorry kid- I'll be upstairs if you need me, gotta find something for Mer. There's a fresh pot of coffee waiting on the counter though."

Alice waited until Alex had disappeared up the stairs before pulling her phone out of her pocket and dialing Amelia's number. The neurosurgeon picked up on the second ring, obviously waiting for her to return the call.

"Are you okay? You didn't do anything else last night, right?" Amelia demanded quickly, not even giving Alice the chance to say 'hello'.

"I'm fine. I...I smoked more after I hung up the phone, but that was it." Alice replied quietly, walking into the kitchen just to double check that she was alone. The teenager wasn't quite used to seeing the house so empty.

"God, Alice, did you even get rid of it yet?" The sigh that the teenager responded with was enough of an answer for her. Amelia barely suppressed one of her own before taking a deep breath.

"Do I need to come out there or can you handle this? You need to tell Lexie-"

"No Lexie. Amelia, she's pregnant and she's happy I'm here and she's happy I've been doing so well. Anyone but Lexie. Or Jo." Alice cut the surgeon off frantically. There were a few seconds of fuzzy silence on the line.

"Did you smoke because of your sister? Did things go alright?" Amelia asked carefully.

"No, no, everything went fine with her. I told her the PG version of what happened and we talked and it was fine. I just found the bag by accident and I couldn't help it-"

"What the hell is this?" Alice whirled around to see Alex standing in the kitchen doorway with her pipe and stash clutched in his fist. The teenager felt her heart drop and then nearly lost her grip on her phone.

"Amelia, I have to call you back. Just...just call Callie or Arizona if you can. They're good with this." The brunette murmured before hanging up the device. Alex was staring her down, face turning a deeper shade of red by the second, and Alice struggled to repress the instinctive fear that was building in the back of her mind.

"I found it in my drawer last night. I didn't know it was in there. I called Amelia as soon as it happened and you can ask her if you don't believe me. I just...I couldn't know it was in there and not do it. I'm sorry. Please don't tell Jo. Please." Alice begged, crossing the kitchen to look Alex in the eye. The surgeon's glare wavered and he searched Alice's face for any sign of insincerity.

"You can't do this to her, Alice. You can't do it to yourself either, but you really can't do this to her. She's never had family before and she's so excited about you. Don't destroy yourself again, and especially don't do it in front of Jo." Alice clenched her eyes shut as a wave of guilt hit her.

"I'm not trying to. I didn't come here and expect to find that. I've been clean since I left."

"I know you have. We've all been so proud of you for that. Especially Lexie. You've got to stay on track for her and for her baby and for Mark. Because I know they miss you and they want you to be able to come home-"

"Alex! Enough with the guilt! I feel bad enough already and I owned up to what happened. I'll probably be staying with Callie and Arizona tonight and I'm sure there's nothing there, so it's fine. Everyone who needs to know, knows. Just drop it." Alice snapped before reaching out and grabbing the bag of weed. Alex sputtered in protest, chasing after the teenager as she hurried down the hallway. However, once he realized Alice was heading for the bathroom, he stopped and watched as she flushed the baggie down the toilet. Maybe she was completely serious.

"Just get rid of the pipe before Jo gets home. I'm going to call Lexie and see if she wants to do anything today." The teenager sighed. Alice brushed past Alex and headed back into the kitchen. Much to her dismay, he followed her.

"She's not going to be mad at you. Jo's not like that." Alex pointed out. He got silence in return as Alice poured herself a cup of coffee and then retreated upstairs.

* * *

><p>"Hey babe." Jo smiled, kicking off her shoes as she entered the old resident's house. She found her boyfriend sitting at the kitchen counter, digging into a colossal bowl of cereal. He glanced up and nodded at her before shoving another spoonful into his mouth. Jo frowned in confusion.<p>

"Where's Alice? Is...is something wrong?" The brunette asked nervously. Her anxiety jumped when Alex didn't respond right away.

"She's fine. Callie and Arizona have her. You can't get mad at her when I tell you this, okay? She can't handle that and a lot of what happened really wasn't her fault." The pediatric surgeon started out carefully. His girlfriend nodded in agreement, concern lacing her features, and waited for him to go on.

"Last night Alice found a bag of weed in her room. None of us bothered searching her room after she left and I honestly don't think she knew it was in there before she stumbled across it. As soon as she messed up, she called Derek's sister and owned up to it. She really didn't want me to tell you, but I couldn't hide it." Alex explained carefully. Much to his relief, Jo nodded and sat down next to him.

"But she's okay?"

"Yeah. I think it shook her up a bit but she's handling it really well. And we're not telling Lexie. She wants to keep her stress levels to a minimum because of the pregnancy and I kind of agree with her." Alex replied honestly. The two of them were silent for a few seconds before Jo spoke.

"I was hoping I could see her again tonight. She's only going to be here for a few more days." The younger of the two sighed.

"Well why don't I call Callie and Arizona and see if it's alright if we drop over? I'm sure they wouldn't mind and Alice needs to see that you're not going to hate her when she messes up."

"She thinks I'm going to hate her?" Jo's voice had a touch of hurt in it and Alex took a deep breath, wondering if this had been a bad idea after all.

"Alice automatically thinks everyone is going to hate her. You can't take it to heart. It's just in her nature still. All you can do is prove to her that you're not going to. And showing up for her even when she's trying to avoid you is how you're going to show her that." He pointed out. A little hesitantly, Jo nodded and pulled out her phone before dialing Arizona's number and handing it to Alex.

* * *

><p>Arizona glanced at her ringing phone, seeing Alex's name flash across the caller ID. Mindful of Alice's presence on the neighboring couch, the surgeon feigned a medical call and excused herself to the other room where Alice wouldn't be able to hear the conversation. Arizona suspected that the independent teen wouldn't take too kindly to being checked in on by anyone, and especially Alex at that.<p>

"Hey, Karev."

"Yeah, hi Robbins. How's she doing?" Alex brushed pass any pleasantries as his girlfriend waited beside him, growing more anxious by the passing minutes.

"She's alright, distracting herself with homework for now. How are things over there? How did Jo react?"

"Fine, she took it in stride. She's mostly disappointed that she might lose out on already limited time with Alice and was wondering if she could drop by and spend some time with her?"

Arizona hesitated, worried that Alice might put up her walls and shut everyone out because of her self-inflicted shame. "I'll be super careful about what I say, I promise. I just don't want her to think that I'm going to turn my back on her because of this." Jo's pleading voice filled the line this time.

"I suppose you're right. C'mon over then." Arizona lamented at last.

Twenty minutes later, a hesitant knock sounded at the door. "Hey, Alice!" Arizona was nearly shouting to get the teenager's attention over the music that was blasting in her headphones. Startled, Alice glanced up in irritation.

"What is it?" She yanked an earbud out.

"I have to go pick up some stuff for dinner tonight, so Jo is here to hang out for a bit." Shock registered on Alice's face, which then quickly shifted back into annoyance.

"I don't need a babysitter." She huffed, before turning her attention back to her work. Well aware of Alice's defensive quirks, the surgeon continued to the hallway and greeted the resident at the door.

Alice listened to the idle conversation that took place between Jo and Arizona at the entrance. A few moments later, the door clicked shut as the paeds surgeon left, with Jo making her way into the living room where Alice was situated.

"Hey," Jo broke the silence, coming to sit on the sofa beside Alice. The teen, who was scowling in frustration at her workbook, finally glanced up and acknowledged her sister with a brief smile.

"Isn't babysitting a bit below your surgical residency pay grade?" Her tone was light and humorous, but she completely avoided eye contact, clearly humiliated.

"You know that's not why I'm here." Jo's voice trailed off as her eyes wandered to the problem that Alice was stuck on. "Oh God, I _loved_ the stoichiometry units." Alice gaped at her sister as if she had three heads.

"Wanna give this one a go then? I've been stuck for like half an hour." She angled the workbook towards the surgeon who studied the question and Alice's work for a few moments.

"You've got the formula right; it's just your significant figures that are off." For the next twenty minutes, the pair powered through the remainder of Alice's homework.

"Thanks for the help. Usually I'm good with this kind of stuff." Alice closed her notebook and shoved it into the backpack at her feet. Truthfully, she would have been able to get through the rest of the homework quite easily, but accepted Jo's help for the simple fact that it meant they wouldn't have to talk about personal things. Her stomach twisted anxiously at the various uncomfortable directions that their conversation could take.

"Alex told me about what happened-"

"Why the hell would he do that?" Alice stood up off the couch the second the words left her sister's mouth and she quickly distanced herself to the other side of the living room. Jo sighed as she remembered what Alex had told her in the car on the ride over.

_"She's going to get really defensive about this. Alice feels like everyone is out to get her, with good reason. She and Lexie used to go at it all the time because I don't think she could really trust that anyone was trying to help her. So just, you know, don't let her convince herself that you're the bad guy." Alex advised, pulling his seat belt over his chest and then revving his car's engine to life. Jo chewed on her bottom lip anxiously and nodded._

_"I think...I think what she told me about her past wasn't the whole truth. Like she mentioned all the things you did, but with the way everyone acts about it, I just get the feeling that things were worse than what she let onto." The young surgeon admitted, finally owning up to the uneasiness she had about what she had been told. Alex was silent for a few seconds before replying._

_"I'm just going to tell you. She's going to be pissed at me, but I don't want her being able to hide things from you. Alice was a hardcore oxy addict. It took Callie, Arizona, Jessica, and Lexie locking her in an apartment to get her clean and from what they've told me, it was a nightmare. She was stubborn and desperate and gave everyone a hell of a time. And then things were good for a while, until her girlfriend broke up with her."_

_"Wait, wait, what? She's into girls?" Jo cut in, confusion written all over her face. Somehow she felt even more out of the loop._

_"Well, yeah. Actually, I think she's into guys and girls. She was with some hippie stoner dude for a while. But anyways, this girl dumped her and Alice ended up with that guy and she overdosed on heroin." Silence rested in between the couple for a few seconds._

_"Oh my God. God, Alex, I should have been there for her. I should have tracked down my parents sooner and found her and got her away from them. What did they do to her, honestly? It had to be bad enough for them to leave town and not come back." This time, Alex was silent a lot longer before he answered._

_"The first night, they dumped her at the ER and she barely drug herself inside. Robbins and Torres were the only ones she'd let touch her, but they had to find Lexie before she actually calmed down enough to let them examine her. Her dad cut her up with a fucking knife. All over; arms, legs, stomach. She had broken ribs and a dislocated shoulder and her eyes were practically swollen shut. That night is why you're never going to see her in short sleeves." Alex's eyes had darkened and Jo watched as he gripped the steering wheel tighter. The brunette was forced to swallow the lump in her throat before she could speak._

_"And the second night?"_

_"She and Lexie had gotten into an argument about something and Alice went out for a run to clear her head. That kid loves running. But Lisa drove up to her on her route. They must have been watching her for a while. She built up some fake sob story that she had changed and wanted Alice to come back and live with her. So she went back to her apartment with her and they beat the shit out of her again. Knocked her out with a damn vase. Lex had to hold her while she got the glass picked out of her head. We found her dumped outside the house the next morning. She was out there in the cold all night before Robbins found her on her way to get the paper the next morning. After that, the drugs just got worse and worse." Alex turned onto Callie and Arizona's street and parked outside their apartment building. He killed the engine and turned to look over at his now very quiet girlfriend. Jo's eyes were fixed straight ahead and he could see her clenching her jaw. Cautiously, he reached across the console and laid a hand on one of her's._

_"Just go in and let her know you're here now. That's all you can do." _

"Because like it or not, I'm your sister. He told me a lot of other things too. I know about what happened before you left, after what happened with you ex. I know about you getting clean and being in this apartment for days on end. I know what Jerry and Lisa did to you. I know everything and I'm here and I'm staying, okay? So don't you dare try to shut me out." Jo deadpanned, getting to her feet and waiting for the teenager's next move. Alice stared at her, a little shocked at how blunt Jo had been with her, as well at how Alex really had told her just about everything.

"You don't have to be here for this. We're related, but you and I both know that doesn't mean a thing." She sighed. Jo started to feel a little less confident, but remembered what Alex had told her. She had to hold her ground.

"Well I want it to. So sit your ass down because I swear to God I will chase you down if you try to leave." Alice arched an eyebrow, but reluctantly crossed the room to sit back down on the couch. Jo suppressed a sigh of relief, nodded curtly, and sat down next to her.

"Okay. Thank you. I'm sorry if that was bitchy." Alice smirked a bit, but kept her eyes on her hands clasped in her lap.

"It wasn't." She replied quietly.

Their conversation was interrupted by the opening of the front door. There were some muffled thumps and then seconds later, the petite blonde surgeon shuffled into the kitchen. Glancing over from their spot in the living room, Alice and her sister wore matching grins as they took in Arizona's appearance. Purse draped haphazardly across her shoulder, her arms were completely loaded with grocery bags.

"Too much pride for two trips?" Alice quipped, earning a giggle from Jo.

"Oh shut up, you would have done the same thing." Arizona shot back, although the lightness in her tone suggested that she wasn't genuinely annoyed with either of them. Alice pushed off the cushions and stood up to help Arizona unpack. As she got to her feet, she noticed her vision blur as her head spun. Wobbling in place, she would have likely fallen over if Jo hadn't reached out and held her steady.

"Hey, what was that? Are you feeling ok?" The teen shrugged her off and stepped away, praying that her balance would hold.

"I'm fine, just a head rush." She lied smoothly, fully aware of the telltale sign that her blood sugar was low, a byproduct of severely under eating.

Half an hour later, the groceries were unpacked and the pasta was ready. The three girls migrated back to the couches, bowls in hand. Arizona glanced at the clock on the wall and her eyes lit up.

"The Bachelor is on!" She turned to the sisters with pleading eyes, thrilled at the rare opportunity to actually watch her guilty-pleasure show. Alice rolled her eyes but nodded. The more distracted Arizona was, the less likely she would notice what Alice was, or rather wasn't, eating. Stifling a sigh, she cast her gaze towards the bowl of ravioli that rested in her hands. Sure, it looked and smelled good, but the thought of actually eating it made her cringe. The stress of travelling, flashbacks, the mini relapse, and meeting Jo all had Alice slipping back into old coping mechanisms. When other areas of her life lacked any semblance of control that she so desperately sought, the familiar pangs of hunger brought a welcome reminder of the things she could control. She poked the pasta pockets around the bowl with her fork for a solid five minutes. Eventually, the emptiness of her stomach grew incessant and she relented, popping a piece into her mouth. Wincing as she swallowed, she gulped down half a glass of water to wash it down. After merely two more pieces and the remainder of the water, the trick had worked and her hunger subsided.

The show finally drew to a close, and Alice couldn't help but sigh in relief. The emotionally taxing day had left her tired enough, and the constant petty drama and flower-induced anxiety of the show offered little distraction from her fatigue. This time, it was Jo who stood up first.

"You two pretty much put everything away and fixed dinner, at least let me clear up." Arizona shot the resident a grateful smile, and handed off her bowl. Once the younger surgeon was out of earshot and had the water running, the paeds attending leaned over to Alice.

"Don't think that your lack of eating went unnoticed tonight." She said in a low tone, giving Alice a reproachful look.

"I wasn't hungry is all. Chill." The teen replied a little too quickly.

"No, I don't buy that." Arizona shook her head.

"You're going to go home tonight and fix yourself a dinner that you actually will eat. PB n J, yogurt and granola, whatever. I've already told Alex to make sure that you follow through on this. I'm guessing that Jo doesn't know about your eating disorder, and if you want to keep it that way then you won't give Alex a hard time. If not, he's going to tell Jo so that you've got a second set of eyes on you." Alice's eyes widened as she took in the surgeon's words.

"That is so unnecessary." She hissed. "I'm not twelve, I can make dietary choices for myself." Arizona shook her head and shrugged before heading into the kitchen to help Jo.

* * *

><p>"Are you okay?" Lexie's question snapped Alice out of her thoughts and the teenager quickly nodded. The two of them had been wandering the aisles of the baby supply store for almost an hour now and eventually their small talk had given way to a comfortable silence.<p>

"Yeah, why?" Although admitting it to Lexie was the last thing she wanted to do, Alice was really not okay. Coming back to Seattle hadn't been as easy as she had thought it would be. Sure, seeing everyone, especially Lexie, had been nice. And meeting Jo had actually been better than she had imagined. But there was something about the city that had pulled her back to the person she never wanted to be.

"You just look a little exhausted or something. Are you feeling okay? Have you been eating?" The surgeon began firing off questions and Alice stifled an eye roll.

"I'm fine. Trust me. Just a little tired." She replied calmly. Learning to keep her defensiveness under control was something that she was becoming truly grateful to Violet for. It led to much less fighting, especially with Lexie.

"Okay, if you're sure. I know coming home had to be a little much, what with a new family member and all." To Alice's relief, Lexie didn't jump to any conclusions about her disheveled appearance. Alex apparently had kept his word about not telling her.

"Yeah. So what are we looking for again? Gender neutral stuff?" Alice quickly changed the subject, choosing instead to focus on buying things for the baby that was bound to arrive in a couple of months. Lexie seemed to perk up and nodded enthusiastically.

"Yeah. Mark and I have taken care of the crib and car seat and everything like that. But we have almost zero clothes." Alice couldn't help but smile at the thought of Mark and Lexie having a kid soon. Considering the way Lexie had looked after her, she knew she was going to make an amazing mom.  
>The two of them spent the next hour or so rummaging through the tiny articles of clothing that lined the store. Finding armfuls of onesies, pajamas, and outfits that Lexie had deemed "adorable", they made their way up to the registers and paid. Bags in hand, the two of them decided to go on one last Starbucks run before Alice had to get to the airport.<p>

"You want your usual?" Lexie asked, handing her bags to Alice. The teenager nodded and went to grab a table as Lexie placed their order. It only took several minutes for the surgeon to return, drinks in hand.

"I'm going to miss you, you know. It's been so different since you left." Lexie smiled sadly as she sat down and handed Alice her drink. The teenager glanced down at her lap and bit her lip. Violet hand told her that stifling her emotions wasn't healthy, yet she couldn't exactly push herself to allow herself to break down in the middle of a Starbucks.

"Of course it has. That's called 'peace and quiet'. Better enjoy it until the baby comes." The teenager forced a chuckle and glanced out the window.

"No, Alice. We really do miss you here. Things just don't feel right. But I'm glad you're doing well in LA. Hopefully you'll feel like coming home more often." The surgeon offered lightly. Alice smiled at her and shrugged.

"Hopefully."


End file.
